Sinister: Why don't they make Golden Nuggets no more?

[Robin Stout]

    I had a dream last night and Gerry Adams was in it. He seemed to be
quite a nice bloke, actually, although I don't think I'll base any political
opinions on this.
    All Tomorrows Picnics was pretty cocking fantastic! It's fun being able
to put faces to people's names, and I ended up with lots of food that wasn't
mine. Upon entry to Tigermilking I was given a packet of Love Hearts which
contained a series of rather forward propositions like "Kiss Me", "Marry Me"
and "Bend Me Over Baby". These proved rather embarrassing. Round here we
have buses with Love Hearts saying "Kidderminster" on them. Hooray! If Peter
Miller wants to know what a townie is he should visit Kidderminster where
townies (locally known as Kiddy Rappers) make up about 96 per cent of the
population. Bastards.
    A few words of advice for anyone thinking of travelling on the London
Underground. The red lever next to the door isn't a support for drunk
people, it's meant to be for emergencys. This often proves confusing for
people from Preston where, aboard the Preston Donkey Express, they have a
similar lever which they pull to have a chat with the driver about their
dyke skeez. It's a good job nothing like that happened in London, isn't it?
Mind you, Starry Sarah did dance to Slow Grafitti with me in a techno
stylee, so I'll forgive her. Not that she pulled the emergency stop lever on
the tube or anything. Oh no.
    Sorry, sarcasm's the lowest form of wit.
    Yesterday I bought the All Seeing I album and it's got some pretty good
tunes, although I don't think it would be anything without Jarvis. I like
the spot-the-celebrity CD sleeve, it reminded me of the Bowlie Weekender.
    This morning I was woken by a couple of Jehovah's witnesses - Big Loud
Womaan and Little Mousey Man - who told me about the love of God. You could
tell that whenever the woman spoke about how people would live in peace in
the kingdom of Jehovah she wanted to say "And they'd get up before eleven in
the morning too, you lazy bugger."

    back to bed then

                                    Robin xxx

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 +-+  "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+
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 +-+                     "jelly-filled danishes"                   +-+
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