Sinister: "say aye tae a pie" - POPULAR baker's slogan

[BabyChris Crystalballs]

I saw that in town testerday.
I'm sorry that I'm mailing again, but the biology
teacher said that we didn't need to bother going to
class, so I am checking my mails again. 100. bugger.

I saw a program the other day about nature and
nurture. It led me to wonder about why I like b&s. Or,
more specifically, would I have liked b&s if it
weren't for certain experiences which I had gone
through.
I'm not saying that I like b&s music because of the
"scene", and things associated with it. I like it
because it is some of the most beautiful music that I
have ever heard - I can bring tears to the eye, or a
smile to the face, it can be uplifting, or gorgeously
empathatic. At primary school people would make fun of
me. It was only names, and the occasional punch, but
when you have to suffer this from the age of 7, it can
be bloody horrible. I didn't have many friends, as I
was quite a quiet boy. Then, on moving to secondary
school, I had gained a reputation as an easy target.
People stared jumping me, beating me up, you know, and
some stuff was really frightening. Say, on time, an 18
year old and his cronies decked me because one of
their little brothers said that I was a cunt. I was 13
at the time. Another time I was stabbed because I had
seen a guy dealing drugs in the pe changing rooms. I
had my nose broken 4 times, and numerous beatings.
This went on till I was about 15. On average I was
attacked about once a week. It wasn't fun. so, for
about 8 years, which is about half my life, I had
suffered at the hands of other people. I don't think
thatb it was through any fault of my own - I never
provoked anyone - althogh I was sometimes told by
people that I should have hit them back, but I
wouldn't as I don't believe in violence. I once took
the "turn the other cheek" thing literally, and ended
up with a severely bruised face.

anyway, this lead to me having a severe lack of trust
in people. And I figured that the people who were
tormenting me were really poular (which they were, for
some reason) and also really stupid. so I sort of
equated these facts to come up with the crystalballs
theory : 
           popular people are stupid and cause pain.
   therefore poular culture is stupid, and followed by
fools.
people who are popular in wide circles follow popular
culture, so to find decent, intellegent, kind people,
look at non popular "scenes" (I0 hate that word, and
don't consider myself to be part of any scene, I don't
believe in scenes, which sort of defeats my argument)

the following generalises a bit, so beware

posible scenes - moshers - smelly, don't like the
music
                                           junkies

                          goths - scary, tend to do it
for                                       attention

                    ah - glasgow indie, and other
ascociated                              types of
music. really nice people, happy to listen to
beautiful music, do not strive for attention, kind
people.
added bonus - music is fantasticly lovely.

but I'm not doing it for the scene. I'm quite a quiet
guy I think, not many people at school know who I am,
and most who do beat me up at one point or know me
beacause I'm tall or because people pronounce my name
"melon" and make jokes about my mum having big melons.
I have to say, I haven't met anyone on the list. But I
think that my assumption was correct - really nice,
caring poeple like really beautiful music.

hope I didn't bore you. I meant to say other things,
but I've been writing for so long that I've forgotten
them

baby chris
CRYSTALBALLS
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