Sinister: sodding Angry Testical Pinchers Festival.

[idle berry]

SOD ATP!

Sorry, but I don't want to hear another bluddy word
about it. So you had a grate time. Oh yeah, wonderful.
Well, can we like, just get on with things now,
please? ATP, thats sooooo last week!

So, while you lot were trying to be all cool to mogwai
and things, I was busy fixing a deal to own the world,
which is currently under pants. There are shares
available to be bought in my new governmental system,
and the more you buy, the more lax I shall be towards
you over breaking any of my new laws now in place.

which are as follows:

1. No mention of ATP before or after the event. Treat
it like sex. keep the details to yourself. Do we
really need to know what a major event of your
lifetime it was? 

 
punishment: Britney Spears force fed into your working
environment, by karoke, or bad commerical MW radio,
until bedtime

2. No eating mashmallows without offering me one first

punishment: having a discussion Margaret Thatcher
about society when she was in power and undestanding
the reasoning behind the poll tax.

3. clothes shops must be forced to sell clothes below
the price of £30 per item in order to make it more
accessible. You too gucci.

punishment: wearing shellsuits, sidey pony tails and
those boot like trainers and being forced to do 30
minutes a day work out to 2 unlimited. S+M for sporty
spice types.

4. do not interupt me when I am daydreaming.

punishment: having an alarm clock strapped to your
body which rings whenever you are allowed to go to
toilet.

and so the list could go on... haven't made my mind up
about the rest of the laws yet, but trust me, their
tough, unfair and ridiculous.


 by the way, I had a lovely weekend. dinner,
champagne, prostitutes (well, walked past a few and
wondered where they do "it" with punters) and
maltesers from the mini bar. 


OH! AND I SAW SOMEONE I KNOW ON "LOVES LIKE A DOG!"
THE ONE LAUREN LAVERETORY SLAGGED OFF! THE ONE WITH
THE SPOOKY BABYS CRIB AND THE YOUNG MUM! I KNOW HER!
AND THE "DAD"!

so there you go.

All hail me. 
yadda yadda yadda.

remember, no more ATP mentions.

By the way, now I own the word, I'm thinking of making
sinister village my capital. Providing you all behave
yourselves otherwise I'll make it a camp prison. Trust
me. I can make it scary for you.

love,
Idles.





=====
http://www.geocities.com/idleberry

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