Sinister: The Discrete Index of Lonely Days

Wed Dec 6 14:52:47 GMT 2000

A/ Ally96 
has returned to Scotland, and London is a poorer
place. He emerged from his specially-sealed time
capsule in the year 1996 to warble: "Pinefox on the
beach, pinefox making women gasp". And we wondered to
ourselves : what could the Pinefox possibly have been
up to? We can only imagine it refers to the sight of
the Pinefox in Shorts that graced Camber Sands earlier
this year. There is possibly evidence of this on Mr
Carslimes picture page. Yes, ladies, he IS still
available.

B/ Bow, Shiva take a, Shiva take a

The strangest bit of actual content has come to our
attention. Older readers may remember Sushil Dade, who
was once a Soup Dragon and is now a driving instructor
and a Future Pilot. His new cd, on Big Steve Pastels
new label, is a charming mixture of Glaswegian geetar
classicism and Indian devotional music, and blow us if
that isnt Mad Dog Murdoch, on a track that translates
as Bow down to Shiva", chanting away like George
Harrison in his prime for over ten minutes! And thats
not all, cos

C/ Content (continued) 

Isobel is on there too, crooning along with Katrina
Mitchell and Mrs Future Pilot. Its all very lovely.
Theres even a track featuring what sounds like Aunt
Sadie belting out "Beautiful Dreamer". We suggest you
investigate, forthwith.

D/ Dr Who 
Sarah Garret Sonner crashlanded into our list of top
ten posters the other day. Among other things she
mentioned how Tom Baker refers to himself as "the
ultimate Dr Who", which is peculiar as we had the
misfortune to hear Jon Pertwees Christmas single
recently, and he also refers to himself as the
ultimate Doctor. They cant both be right. We
personally side with Pertwee, not only for his
dandyism, but also because his surname suggests he is
both pert and twee, a combination we find
irresistable.

E-F/ Examine Foxgloves
Hoo hoo! If youre a lumberjack at a loose end, why
not pop along to www.chickfactor.com where the
photographs of Queen Gail OHara are currently
appearing in a ghostly fashion. If you get three
pictures of Foxgloves 1 in a row, apparently, you win
an evening out for two in the Muji store of your
choice.

G/ Gorey, Edward
Sarah GS also mentioned Edward Gorey, a couple of
whose books are being republished for the festive
market and would make ideal stocking-fillers for the
morbid fantasist in your life. We recently discovered
that Mr Gorey roomed at college with the
happy-go-lucky New York poet Frank OHara, a notion
which boggles our poor noggins.

H/ Hewitt, Stephen
mentioned the cover version the Genteel Daves did at
the close of their set the other day. Supposedly
called "and the beat goes on"  the one goes that goes
"la da dee da da, la dee dee dee dee" that isnt that
one about the homeless lady. Somebody, possibly Mark
Casarotto, claimed that this was a Sonny and Cher
b-side, but this sounds dubious to us. Who can put us
right?

I/ Isobel Campbell
Words cannot properly express how impressed we were
with the Mental Lathes the other night. The
arrangements were all lovely and Isobel sang very
nicely, and well we were quite charmed by the whole
thing. One point of contention, however: with her new
longer hair, does Ms Campbell still qualify as a
"gamine"? And how does one define a gamine, anyway?
Elucidation, please.

J/ Jackson, Stevie
As Julie coyly hinted the other day, we also had the
pleasure of sharing a urinal trough with Stevie J that
night. We didnt peek. But we think that he might
have.

K/ Kado, Steve 
said "by the way, if anyone wants to help me
understand later wittgenstein's thought with an eye
towards what would make a good/useful essay...and if
you can work Mikail Bahktin into it too, that would be
so rad."

The world, mused Ludwig, is all that the case is
Mikail thought this a discouraging basis
Preferring the charms of the dialogical,
The carnivalesque and the scatalogical.

L/ Love, Oscar 
from our Dublin brother magazine, Blather, kindly
donated that last poem. 

M/ Miller, Peter 
mentioned the film of Charlies Angels, which is quite
entertaining, and makes one want to learn kung fu, and
answers the question of what Crispin Glover is up to
these days. Strangely, it is a rare example of a
pretty good film in which Bill Murrary is pretty bad,
when the opposite is usually the case. We give it
7/10. Only two films have scored better this year. We
will leave you to speculate what they were.

N/ Nou Camp
Peter also advised Jordi not to pretend to be a cat in
the Nou Camp stadium. Which is sage advice;. the last
person to pretend to be a cat in a football stadium
was Peter "The Cat" Bonnetti in 1970. And look what
happened to him.

O/ Owl, jen
Said "I just gave him a bog frown" and we wondered
what she could possibly mean. Is it like a brown
study?

P-Q/ Pop Quiz!
Ally96 scurrilously mentioned people nicking poems to
put in their pop lyrics. Can you name the pop songs
and poems these words appeared in? The first person to
mail us privately with the correct answer wins a
mystery prize.
1) She walks in beauty like the night
2) Twilight turns to amethyst, then deep and deeper
blue
3) Butterflies with gilded wings

R/ Runion, Philip
Used the expression they knocked boots until the sun
came up" in a lewd fashion with reference to an Isobel
Campbell song. Bravo.

S/ Select magazine
is dead, apparently. We shed a quiet tear. It has been
terrible for ages, of course, but of all the UK music
mags it had seemed to be nicest about B&S. And of
course it did that 5-page feature on 200 hundred
troubled teenagers a couple of years ago, and featured
an interview with the dear departed Duke of Harringay.
Talking of which, Tangents looks like it is dead at
the moment too. Is the flame of P!O!P! to be so easily
extinguished?

T/ Twee interlude
A wee kitten is playing with a ball of knitting wool
and getting in a frightful tangle.

U/ Um

V/ V-twin 
Did anyone go and watch them being filmed the other
night? Did they turn on the charm for the cameras,
those loveable rogues?

W/ Wells, Bill 
What a cool-looking troupe! They have a member who
looks like Catweasel, another who looks one of those
scary potato men out of Dr Who and a gamine flautist
who looks a bit Amelia Fletcher - all in the same
band! You cant say that about many groups  - except
Sportique, of course.

X/ XFMAS
Hmmm. Does anyone else remember when the Sheepster
staff were leading the fight against the great Satan
that is the evil XFM corporation, way back when? Or
did we dream it? And why does no one on this list talk
about the Fortuna Pop Christmas lp which came out this
month, and features the Ailsa Set! Saloon! And the
Pines!

Y/ Year end polls
People always send these to the list in December and
it can get a little tiresome. Can some eager beaver
step forward to compile the End of Year 2000 Sinister
top ten singles/crushes/greatest wanks etc? If no one
wants to volunteer we dont mind doing it ourselves,
but we cant guarantee impartiality. Compared to us,
Jed Bush is one honest injun.

Z/ zzzz

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