Sinister: "Your room smells like an opium den, young lady"

[JENOWL22 at xxx.com]

Hewwo,

The subject line is what my dad just said when he came into my room. I think 
he thought I'd been smoking pot, but I was only burning insence, which is 
fabby. I would never ever smoke pot. But my room looks really groovy, since I 
gave up on lightbulbs, and now live by sun and candlelight. Except when I 
need to see clearly.

Someone gave me a really nice winter present today. I was a very pretty 
celtic cross, and ring, and it was from the little girl that I teach guitar 
to. I feel really bad, though, cause I only got her a little beaded box of 
girly stuff like nail polish and lip gloss and parma violets. But it was 
purple, which is my favourite colour, and her's too, I think.

I got some of my prelim marks back again today, and I'm a bit happy, because 
so far I have got no more than three wrong in any test, and full marks in a 
lot. The best part was that I didn't tell my friends, so nobody really knew, 
except my mum (and now sinister), and they all think I got a really bad mark, 
because I didn't tell them. I'm such a minx.

I lay awake for a very long time listening to the Lazy Line Painter Jane CD, 
just smiling, because of all the amazing little touches that I'd never heard 
before. I really like A Century of Elvis now, which I used to hate, and skip 
it every time it came on. But now I think it's just fabby and grate and 
magical, and I wish Stuart David hadn't left. If I saw him in the street, I'd 
give him a bog frown. Kar'n and he are the perfect couple, and it's just sad 
that they're so lovely, but no longer part of one of my favourite things. 
It's a hard thing to describe, but I'm so sad that I think that anything 
connected with Belle and Sebastian in such a close way would be so suicidal 
to sever tha, because it must be something really wonderful.

Ooh, I'll just shut up. I'm just a sad little obsessive. 

Someone asked me (James the ginger perv), if the fact that i've kissed so 
many people makes me feel shallow. I've only kissed about 15 people, 
properly. But I don't see why not. Kissing is the best thing in the whole 
wide world, and you should share it with as many people as possible. A boy 
called Andrew said I was the Kissing Angel, because I would go to parties 
with him and snog (but god I hate that word) all the boys and girls who'd 
never been kissed before, because they were nerds, or all the boys and girls 
who were feeling depressed, and needed to feel wanted. And I don't think 
that's shallow, at all. I think it's a good thing, to be able to share that 
with people.

Another thing he said I was shallow for, was because I don't ever see anyone 
as completely bad. I always manage to find something nice about someone. We 
tried this, and I was sticking up for all the hard kids, and even Hitler, 
because I always felt kind of sorry for him, even though he did bad things. 
He said that I would never be close to anyone, because I can't properly hate, 
so I can't properly love. And I know that it's true that the two need each 
other , it doesn't need to be a perfect balance, does it? Besides, it's not 
as though I'm completely indiscriminate, I do like some people better than 
others, you know.

Aww, man, don't tell me I'm getting all mopey in my old age.

Back to the old me now, I have learned the Noddy theme tune in german. Wayhey!

I love you all, and I really mean that.

Hugs,
Jen

Ps. I put more stuff on my website. Well, one new Bob the Ghost Wasp thing, 
about the Bob Squad and how it was made. And some stuff I wrote for English, 
because the teacher said they were too long to hand in, and I didn't know 
what to do with them. 






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