Sinister: Ian Ian Ian Ian. As Long as Ian is your name.

[Sarah Clarke]

Dear you lot, 

first post of the new millen-ian-m (milennium) and I must say I'm not
impressed. Already I'm ripping off jokes from Fist of Fun. What's next! Harping
on about bloody Ancient Greek mythology and writing epic poems about it just to
torment English students in Y3K???! If you want to know what I'm on about read
Keats - load of shagging bollocks is what I say. I don't mean to come across
all ever-read-any-rabelais but English Classic Literature? Deritivative wanking
more like. If it was Pop Music, top still WRITES IN CAPITALS hack 'Swells'
would slag it all off and tell us to read some modern hip young spark. Like
um...Tim Hopkins or Keith Watson or Trevor McDonalds memoirs. Yeah.

Crikey thats very intellectual for me. You'd think I was a BLUDDY STUDENT.

You know I've never been sent the poetry pisswanking bird? Thank god. Cos I'd
only post some doggerel along the lines of this:

On Missing the Tube, But Hopefully Someone Will Have Taped It, I hope, If It
Was Anything That Special.

       I missed Da Toob. 
   What a Boob!
I'd need some Lube!
           For up the bum sex, 
If I was being Crude.

(Starry, copyright me and stuff)

Good eh?

My new years resolution is to ride the number 85 bus to Putney one day. And
another resolution is to go to Waterloo Bridge in Swinging Lunding, and get a
bus going to PENGE. For all of you not in the know, Penge is the land of the
undead, where fools fear to tread. I've never been there but I wish to
understand it's immortal ways. Kinder like I imagine Buttfuck, Illinois to be
like. But without the um... you know whatting.

WOULD YOU LOT ALL SHUT UP ABOUT SEX? I almost miss the WHO. No actually I
don't.
Michele will you tell us about Classic Rock please?

Love, Sarah
xo


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