Sinister: a gorgeous man with a swimmer's build

[Damon Seils]

Piddles, gather round.

Important developments of the last few days...

1. Adam Apparatus may inadvertently have discouraged certain "rowdy
girls" from taking part in the sweet delicate pudding that is the body
parts page. Let's please have none of that. Rowdy girls, do with your
body parts as you like. Mr. Apparatus, I'll speak with you in the back
office, please. Please.

2. The breasts are Kerry's, apparently. Let's all pretend we didn't hear
her admission. I mean, what if you've been dreaming they belonged to
someone else? What if you were hoping they belonged to Honey, or to the
girl down the road, or to Mother Russia? I know of two people in
particular who've laid down good money that they're Isobel's. And then
Kerry comes along and let's it out...so to speak. Let's keep pretending
the breasts belong to someone else. Dreams make life worth living. I
learned that in a movie about American football. You can learn a lot
from movies about American football.

3. Now that this Will Porter has achieved a sort of minor celebrity
status among some of us, I think it's time we start applying some
pressure. Time for Mr. Porter to follow the rules. It looks like he's
mentioned his bottom in a recent post. Let me check my notes. Yes,
that's right. His ass. And something about the pointed end of a cowboy
boot. Well, technically speaking, only the ass falls under my purview
here. So let's see to it.

No content of any relevance here, really. Well, I mentioned Isobel,
but... Does that really count? Um. Oh, I think the new box set is a dumb
idea, and all the kids should boycott it. Say it with me... Oh nevermind.

Damon Langerflitzen
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