Sinister: If you go down Pigeon Street...

[Martin Robinson]

...these are some of the people you will meet...

It's OK it's not another Children's TV spectacular though they did have 
excellent triangular trousers which I unfortunately couldn't find last time 
I was in Marks and Sparks. I was just the other day ,though, subjugated to 
the strangest form of literary criticism. I was on my way home from a bit of 
a pop spectacular at Covent Garden's very own Poetry Café on a London 
Underground tubular vehicle when the train unfortunately terminated at 
Northfields. Whilst waiting for the next Heathrow train I continued to read 
my book, Arthur Koestler's "Arrival and Departure", on the platform when a 
pigeon decided it would crap on said book and also splendidly dribble it's 
greeny excretion down my jacket. Which was a bit much really. So I shook my 
fist angrily at said pigeon and told him a bit harshly to plop off somewhere 
else in no uncertain terms. To which he responded that he was doing me a 
favour and that as a fictional representation of the failure of idealism in 
post-revolutionary power said book served a purpose only historically and 
aesthetically and meant little in this new millenium. He emphasised the need 
to look forward and not distort the future by focussing too much on the 
past. Which I was momentarily confused by, but I think I responded quite 
cleverly by saying, 

"As Arthur Koestler once said himself "If the creator had a purpose in 
equipping us with a neck, he surely meant us to stick it out." But I'm not 
sure he thought the same about pigeon's arses."

Alright so that's not true. Instead I responded with "oh yeah Professor 
Pigeon! I'm going to send you my dry cleaning bill." But he got the message. 
Anyway the evening had a happy ending as we kind of got on after that and 
we're going to form a book club for intellectual vermin and vegans in the 
London area. Which is nice.

I'd also like to take this chance to apologise publically to the residents 
of Greenwich as some new neighbours are arriving that are likely to lower 
your property value and spend most of their time loitering around local 
areas of public congregation drinking alcohol and mouthing obsceneties. 
Least that's what I like to do most weekends. 

Te ra,

Martin

ear confection recordings
(http://www.send.demon.co.uk)

p.s Speaking of ear confection... your not? Well I am, recently I keep 
reading about how bands are having the first ever mp3 single, single on the 
web and stuff. If I was a pigeon I would plop unmercifully on their 
articles. Maybe. Actually if anyone's got any top tunes they want to put on 
there give me a shout.

p.p.s. Oh and I think twanging an elastic band against a ruler would be more 
pleasing than watching that Elastica band the other night. They were, in my 
opinion, most pants.






	


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