Sinister: for jobs that are big...

[Nick.Dastoor at xxx.uk]

Fiona fiona fiona

>  she should try making anything rhyme with fiona

How about 'There's this girl Fiona / She's mine but I don't own her'?

That wasn't completely my own work.  When are Hopkirk & Lee going to release
another record?

> also, is there anyone on this list who has some sort of shared
> house arrangement and doesn't hate their flatmates.

In my experience there is always one flatmate who doesn't fit in with the
others.  They become a the whipping boy/girl.  It's healthy, except when you're
the outcast, which happened to me once.  This rule applies no matter how small
the household is.  If you live on your own, you will end up blaming yourself for
things you didn't do.  You will also talk about yourself behind your back and
develop a crick in your neck.

My solution to the slip case issue:

Enter a land of make believe.

There appears to have been an upsurge in people using 'twee' as a synonym of
GRATE.  It's NOT.  Twee backwards is nearly 'eewch', which is the sound you
should make when someone is being twee. Remember - Belle & Sebastian R hard, not
'cloyingly sweet' or 'affectedly precious'.  This isn't true or anything, but
it's much more cute if you think that way.  I seem to be saying I'm cute.
Stuart Murdoch wrote to me once and he had the following to say on the subject:

>>It's a funny thing twee. I wish I could be twee just so I could be seventeen
again and act like a baby. But it's in the eye of the beholder. Perhaps the
workman beholds me being at my most mature and thinks "Twee fucker." I'm
envious though. I'd like to be able to take my knitting to a club again. And
dribble into my cider.>>

But you shouldn't listen to what he says.  Twee fucker.

I do have cuddly toys in my bed, but only so that I can make girls can go 'aah!'
but not want to sleep with me, and get lectures from exasperated friends (mainly
female) about how I am ruining my scoring potential.  Tweeness as a
bloody-minded expression of a self-destructive urge.

More mature readers will remember the song the song snake wrote for Belle &
Sebastian, 'If only I had lips I would kiss you'.  Well the other day I was
flicking around on cdnow and I came across an old song with a very similar
title.  So the song snake is not magic at all.

My potted film reviews:
American Beauty - not so good.
Wonderland - terrific.

Nick xxx


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