Sinister: Next stop....HELL

[RythSoul at xxx.com]

         The religion topic really interests me, especially when hearing from 
others who are skeptical. Being from a quaint little suburb in California, 
where ninety percent of the community is Christian, I don't get to engage in 
any sort of religious debate without automatically feeling as if I am already 
burning alive in the firey pit of hell. I can't tell you what a relief it is 
to read opinions from other people that are the same as mine. My best friend 
and I always joke with our Catholic friend about how she doesn't have to pray 
for us anymore because we've already accepted that we're going to hell, 
hmm..for some strange reason she never laughs. 
     i just don't buy it anymore. the whole heaven and hell thing. and now 
that i am at this point in my life where i have questioned my faith i can't 
believe that i was ever naive enough to just believe what a book told me, and 
that i could just trust something that  i had no proof of. And yet on the 
flip side, I miss having that faith, something to believe in and hold on to. 
in some ways i feel like it's my innocence that was lost along with it. 
    I don't know if i will ever regain my faith in God. Not the Christian 
aspect of God at least. I've seen too much suffering, my own and those that I 
love. I don't say that I'm an atheist though, because I do believe that there 
has to be a God, I just don't know that I can trust him yet. 

        Well i'm sure that i've bored you all so i will go.
Lissa
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