Sinister: Date: Thu, 1 Jun 2000 21:11:30 +0100

[James Glossop]

hi kids

well. simultaneous equations are mighty interesting, you don't agree?

just wanted to report a (very vague) b&s moment to y'all...... so i've spent
the past week revising a bit and have designated the evenings as internet
time; work gets no-where near my room after six, but the internet, in all
it's vastness and entiriety, had little to offer after an hour and a half,
so at half eight i decided to go on a little walk around the estate. i can't
cope with silence very well, so i picked a cd from my collection. it happen
to be bwtas, so i walk out of the house and head west to the green part of
my estate, where i can see lots of trees and the sunset and a little house
on the horizon. i could probably download this type of image, but it's not
the same, y'know? so i stroll away, trying best to make sure i don't step in
time with the music, it makes me feel uncomfortable, even if the beat did
happen to be the same, i'd slow down or speed up. i don't want to create
this microcosmic richard ashcroft thing, it freaks me out.
    i'll get to the point, i pass this guy who i recognise. about a year or
two ago he head-butted me because my friend flagged him. my friends stood
bemused as this guy (who is about 25, when i was 14) speedily parked next to
us, i stopped to be courteous and he gets out of his sports car, comes up to
me, says "got summat to say?" i say "no" and he head-butts me square in the
face before forcing me to apolgise to his friend in the car. totally
humiliating, he speeds off, laughing no-doubt, and i mumble under my breath
the names of some hard-kids who wouldn't beat someone up for me if i paid
them, but it helped me think i was going to get my revenge. anyway, i walk
past this guy, who's cycling round-and-round in circles in the middle of the
(quiet suburban, mind) road. i release that isobell campbell and stuart
murdoch are singing angelically in my ears to a background of brass
instruments. now, i don't have in-ear headphones, so the whole street can
probably hear it. i don't want to look like i'm too intimidated, so i keep
the volume as it is (max) and continue walking, shitting myself inside and
praying that he doesn't come to taunt me about the fact that the shit i'm
listening to isn't fast enough. i get away in the end, i look sideways, to
catch a mere glimpse and see him persistently going
round-and-round-and-round-and-round-and-round in the middle of the road.
bizarre. i walk on, reaching the highest point in the estate, with a nice
view of the surrounding at-least-2-miles and realise that all i want to do
to this guy is not shoot him, maim him or re-arrange his facial features
with a bottle, i just want to apologise to him for something, which is
weird, cos i hadn't done anything wrong to him, it was my dumbass of a
friend that flagged him when his dance music was to loud in his car. i just
wanted to hug the guy. which is all very twee. (or sad, depending on the way
you look at it).

stop it, you're killing me...........

love

your mail-order host,

-JiM- xx

PS: tee-shirt idea for the masterminds behind camden market and similar
individual clothing stores: "i fucked it all up, but, hey, i'm happy".
central, in a nice-n-plain font. in a really
it's-so-tight-i'm-unsure-about-his-sexuality fabric. green, white, or maybe
pale blue.

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