Sinister: Got my sunshine - I'll get by

[Vegard Enlid]

Hi, all you lovely people. This is my first post, so bear with me.
My name is Vegard, I’m 26 and living in Trondheim (Norway). After the noisy 
Swells/NME debate, I don’t know if I dare to tell you my current occupation. 
I’m a mainly a music journo (don’t kill me, please), but because I work as a 
freelancer in a daily newspaper, I also write about a lot of other stuff.

I’m just back from a week’s binge with some mates from back when I was a 
student (2 years ago). I always look forward to these meetings. Mostly 
because I get the chance to see my beloved friends again, but also because I 
know I’ll be drunk for days. I guess we have this "romantic" view about some 
bohemian lifestyle. One of my best friends have this dream: When he gets old 
and rich, he’ll buy  himself a house on the French Riviera. Then he’ll sit 
on his porch, look out towards the sunset and the sea, writing bad poetry 
and drinking himself slowly to death on expensive wine. We get all 
misty-eyed when we talk about this. A stupid dream perhaps, but it never 
fails to lift our spirits and help us down another drink.

I also went to a class reunion this weekend (10th anniversary), and it was 
really a great experience. Almost everyone had done fairly well, even the 
"trouble makers". Everyone said I had changed the most. Not so strange, as I 
was just a tiny, invisible toe-rag back then. The situation reminded me a 
bit about the liner notes (or whatever you’d like to call it) on IYFS, you 
know the part about Chris Geddes, him playing the piano on national radio 
while the casuals are sweeping up in Burger King. Not that I’ve ever been 
close to playing the piano on national radio, of course. But it was really 
strange to see this newfound respect in their eyes. I don’t really bear 
grudges towards any of them though. They never bothered me much (I was just 
anonymous, not very geeky). One of the guys, who used to be the hardest in 
the class, a real pain in the ass, explained how he’d been totally neglected 
by his parents when he was a kid. He was so proud because he’d managed to 
get a steady job, a girlfriend and a kid he loved. He got really soppy, and 
it was a moving moment for a guy like me, who strongly believe that every 
human being has the potential to do good things. So, that’s the "once a 
cunt, always a cunt", theory down the toilet. Some of the people who didn’t 
do very well in school had great jobs and nice families as well.
I also had this long, nice talk with the girl who was my girlfriend when we 
were 12 (we hadn’t seen each other at all for the last 8 years). You know, 
back then we didn’t have the nerve even to hold hands, and we certainly 
didn’t kiss (I remember just the thought of it used to make me so nervous I 
got sick). We really hit it off, and we ended up snogging. She said it was 
"pleasant" to see me again. In a strange way, I think that’s the nicest 
thing a girl has said to me for a long time. Certainly better than "cute" (a 
word all the girls used about me in school when I  was nothing but a tiny 
mascot. I wanted to be "handsome" and "desirable", not "cute"). The downside 
of it (there’s alway one, isn’t it?): Her (huge) boyfriend plays centre-back 
for my beloved local football team. Maybe he’ll find out, get sad and play 
like shit for the rest of the season? Oh dear...

Well, that’s enough from my messy head for now. I guess I’ll try the 
chatroom soon, but it really scares the hell out of me. I’ve never tried IRC 
before in my life, you see. I’m afraid it’ll all be in-jokes and slang I 
don’t understand. But some of you have been kind enough to invite me 
already, so it’ll be nice I guess.

Love,
Vegard

***
Take me out tonight
Because I want to see people and I want to see lights
– The Smiths –
***

P.S. The subject line is taken from a song on the latest Mojave 3 album. 
It’s lovely, and all of you should buy it…

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