Sinister: Dirty!

[Alder, Lucy]

Dear little innocent Holly, straight out of the nursery and all wet behind
the ears said
>>It is so refreshing  to come across a list where the biggest debate is
not...who do you most want to shag

How long is it that newbies stay in the nursery these days?  Two weeks?
Does that mean there hasn't been any filth for TWO WHOLE WEEKS?  Where are
the Sinister smutmeisters when you need them?  I feel the burden weighing
heavily on my shoulders, but I'm far to good a girl to write about that sort
of stuff.  I might blush.  I might blush even more than when I mentioned
wanking in front of my manager this morning.  You know when you get an email
that makes you laugh out loud and then everybody around you asks "what's so
funny?" and you're sort of obliged to explain?  That's what happened today
and the email mentioned the word 'wank'.  So then, I became embroiled in a
discussion about wanking in America and whether or not it exists, and I said
"I think the word is not so frequently used, but as for the activity..." and
it all got a bit embarrassing, see?  And I hung my head in shame that my
colleagues could hear me talking so.  Now you see why I'm no good at writing
smutty posts and why I'm burning up as I type this.

And here I am, being an old miseryguts about the dearth of rude stuff, and
into my inbox pops psychic Sam with
>>naked people
which will do for now. 

But come on folks, spring is sprung!  Birds are NESTING on the windowsill
outside my bog!  Bunny rabbits are presumably AT IT like, um, bunny rabbits
up and down the country!  I know it's Lent at the moment, but honestly!
Sinister smutmeisters!  Show us how it's done - make me snigger!  And the
rest of you, let me recommend an author called Georges Bataille, who is a
master of all things rude.  And I really do mean ALL things rude.

Right, on to other stuff.  Why does a brand new denim jacket cost £30  and a
second-hand one £40 in Topshop, eh?  What is this?  Antiques Roadshow?  When
I was a kid, you wore second hand things because they were cheap, and then
PRETENDED you were being groovy.  Why, it wasn't unusual to mistake a
student for a tramp, especially if they had a bottle of White Lightning in
their hand.  And what are those ridiculous new pantaloons that people are
calling Levis?  (Lucy shakes her stick and growls menacingly) Young'uns
these days, really!  Pass the Werthers Originals, will you?

According to new research High Fidelity is a 'boy book'.  I read this in
Metro, so it must be true.

Terry Hall was 41 on Sunday.

Socialise with Pukka Pies.

Juicy Lucy


ps.  according to my spellcheck, Topshop should be Topcon and Pukka should
be Puke, which seems about right to me.













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