Sinister: spending warm summer days indoors

[Caroline Mary Browne]

ah yes Ive been doing a lot of that recently since finishing my finals
(HOORAY) well it should be shouldnt it? but no, the simple things really
arent as great as you imagine them to be when your studying lots and lots.
I actually handled the old having final exams thing very badly and
decided upon insomnia, irritability, heartburn and irrationality as a
means of getting through them.  In the second exam I got that disapearance
of all thoughts thing that I thought only happened to other people who
only really made it up anyway.  I had to leave the exam hall to cry lots
only to be followed by an invigilator who tried to comfort me in
very pigeon English (he was Italian see) by saying such things as `some of
the most successful people in the world don't have degrees' and `you can
always repeat'. This made me cry some more but also made me want to go
back into the exam hall to get away from the least comforting man in the
world which was very embarrasing because every one looks up to see the red
eyed girl with a look of pity. I did manage to do the rest of the exam
though so it was alright (in case you were wondering)

I kind of wish I was out at picnics like most of you probably are.  I left
the house for the first time yesterday and kind of had a picnic.  first I
went to the cinema to see a film called the virgin suicides. We chose to
go and see that because we thought it sounded funny but disturbing was
actually how it turned out to be.  It was good though, very good
actually but I never really decide what it is that I like or dont like
about a film and lots of other thoughts about it until several days after
when Im walking down a road or on a bus or looking at a group of strangers
or something. Anyway we then went on our picnic before which we went to
pet dogs at an RSPCA stand thing.  We gave money to a man who, at first
appeared to have very nicely given up his Friday to collect for charity
but gradually revealed himself for the horrible sleezy man he was making
such comments as `while your down there' to my friend when she dropped
some change and 'here you should have a rabbit badge, I bet you go like
one ha ha ha ha'.  `your not interested in preventing cruelty to animals
at all' we said as we ran as fast as we could away from the horrible
man.  Later on we saw him shouting obsenities at frightened school
girls. Our picnic was a bit odd really we decided to place ourselves
strategically next to three crusty men with two litre flagans of cider who
decided upon us as perfect suitors and insisted we come over for a
friendly slug of their cider.  Each one picked who best of my friends he
was suited to and then one of them said to another  ` I dont like your one
much' which made us a laugh uncontrolably which made them thinking that we
were flattered by their attention which then sent a whole ball rolling
type scenario until it was time to go home. 

I saw the legal man video on no disco the other night there and I have to
say I didnt really like it that much.  It was just too all over the place
or something.  I also didnt like the way Sarah only gets a brief look in
at the start.  The only bit I really liked was when one of the two men
attempts to wave at one of the transvestites and the other man stopped him
at least I think thats what was happening but possibly I completely
misinterpreted it.   As for the song well I like it for what it is but
wouldnt really call for much more of that sort of thing in a big hurry  
if that makes any sense (mental image of all 7 members of belle and
sebastian taking a careful mental note of Caroline's insightful comments).

Im going to New York to get as far away from Dublin as I possibly can in
2 weeks. Not that I dont like Dublin but I just need to leave it for a
while but this scares me lots. My friend Bryan says that theres an
accomodation crisis there at the moment and that Ill have to live in a
rubbish bin like oscar out of sesame street.  I think things that are
likely to go against me in New York are a) being very shy and unassertive,
b) having no sense of direction and being very indecisive c) having skin
that burns in 5 minutes of exposure to the sun and well of course having
no job or accomodation.  anyway I would very much appreciate any help/
advice etc. from any kind New Yorkers.

Isuppose I better go now as I have red hair dye in my hair which I must
wash out which also seems to have permanently stained the palms of my hand
red and underneath my nails too.Oh I got Hefner's breaking gods heart and
its
quite beautiful.

Bye Bye Sinister
Caroline
xxxxyyyyyyzzzp.

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