Sinister: There's a lot to be said for lifelong love and sex and security

[Mr Smiley]

Hello,

    I've been thinking, for some inexplicable reason, about the 5th Duke of
Portland. I think I'll tell you a little bit, because it came to my
attention that my posts are usually too relevant for their own good.
    He was a funny guy, was the 5th Duke of Portland. He had a great big
house, Welbeck Abbey, which is now used to build murderous robots. Oh sorry,
I mean it's now an Army training college, but in the 19th century it was
something more interesting.
    So anyway, he had this great big abbey to live in, but he decided that
he would only live in 5 rooms of it. He painted all of the walls pink, and
the rest of the abbey began to fall into ruin. And - this is the really
interesting bit - to say he was a recluse was an understatement. He was a
RECLUSE. He built tunnels underground, 1000s of metres of underground
tunnels. They went around his estate, and one went to Worksop town centre
and the other went to Worksop train station. He also built an underground
ballroom (a pink one). When he wanted to go anywhere, he would get in his
coach, trundle off down the tunnels to the train station, then his carriage
(with him still in it) would be loaded onto a train wagon and off he'd go.
    Apparently, he was a kind person. He used to muck in with the workmen,
or something, so he wasn't a very good duke as dukes are supposed to be
snobby - it's the rules. He once donated a collection of miniatures to a
display in Manchester, but someone pinched them so he never did that again.
    And at some point he died from one of the many diseases that had plagued
him all his life. He'd never really done anything, his brother was some army
guy who got involved in politics and stuff I think, but our shy duke spent
the best part of his life in his underground lair and his 5 rooms in the
abbey. I wonder how he got on without people, to talk to him and stuff. Or
maybe he just didn't need people, but myself I cant understand this, as I
tend to go a bit mental when I haven't spoken to anyone for a while.
    Anyway, I was just quite fascinated today by the thought of this lonely
duke living in his abbey and throwing balls (I mean the type with music and
dancing and stuff) in his pink underground ballroom.

Platonic hugs,
Mike
ICQ: 73775341
Email - smiley at rebelmonkey.freeserve.co.uk
The Black Den - http://www.rebelmonkey.freeserve.co.uk

Tomorrow (or soon) I think I will go and have a look at the remains of this
tunnel. I saw the pink underground ballroom once, when Welbeck Abbey had an
open day. But if I tried that now I'd get shot by an over enthusiastic
guard.

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