Sinister: typewriter tappers you're all just crappers

[Blake]

i feel like rambling on and on and on incessantly, elaborating to no end
about my troubles; digressing about my sorrows; detailing the horrors.  but
i won't.  i will simply make generic, blind statements that we can all
enjoy.

listen: i think love is an illusion.  somebody tell me i'm wrong.  actually,
i know i'm wrong.  but sometimes i think a group of middle aged, fabulously
well-to-do men in a white walled room, cold and sterile, came up with such a
premonition: love.  and they spread this ill conceived notion upon the rest
of us, making those of us not privy to its most intimate nuances feel
slightly worthless and unusable.  just a theory, you see.

listen: young girls are so brutal.  they are.  there are young girls on this
list.  you should be ashamed of breaking my heart every 2-6 months.  like a
clock!

listen: i don't think god is dead.  i think he's out of the office at the
moment; he got caught in traffic on the way back to the office.  and he's
got incredible road rage.  look out.

listen: i think that these are precious times.  everyone, run outside right
now and breath the autumn air.  it sounds really inane: cheesy, even.  it's
not.  i promise.  and i've never lied to you.  never ever ever ever
concentrate on the future.  just worry about where you are.

listen: i believe in love.  i believe it's out there.  it's no myth.  i know
it isn't.

a brief question: does anyone have a love/hate relationship with the
mysterious crush?  i know i've beaten this issue to a cruel and unusual
death on this list through the years, but i feel as though i've dedicated
enough time to the issue that i deserve an explanation.  why do i love and
hate being totally infatuated with a mysterious, young, lovely girl at the
same time?  is it the sickness upon waking up, knowing she's waking up too?
that she, like me, is incredibly normal?

through my years of heartbreak i have always put those objects of affection
on unnecessary pedestals: i pretty much took myself out of the running as
soon as anything started.  now, if we both brush our teeth, put on our pjs,
and read before bed, are we not the same?

things to contemplate.  if anyone has any answers, i will next time, post
about b&s.  i think.  i have stuff to say.

not meant to be a pity post, but that's what it is, isn't it?
very sorry, don't flog me
xxoo
blake
the nerdy shy-eyed pacifist

http://members.tripod.com/nucleartrout

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