Sinister: I feel like Alan Minter

[nicolson ian]

This is ace.  You know how lots of people are posting
about being students and being back at college and
stuff?  Well, I'm currently masquerading as a student
who's back at college.  Cause it turns out that even
though I graduated in the summer I can still log onto
the computers, therefore get free internet access! 
Huzzah!  I'm not really sure that I'm supposed to be
doing this, so I'm hiding in the corner of the
computer lab crapping myself that I might be thrown
out onto the street at any moment.  Actually, my
matriculation card doesn't expire until August next
year, so I'm beginning to suspect that I've maybe
still got a year to go and nobody's told me and the
whole graduation thing was just a particularly vivid
dream.  Maybe I'll wake up tomorrow and find Bobby
Ewing in the shower.

So I've spent this morning catching up on the posts
I've missed in the past few days when I've been
suffering from Olympic withdrawal.  You know, staring
at blank TV screens all day and all night.  Actually,
I was pretty much like that before the Olympics as
well.  But it was like losing a friend when it
finished.  It's inspired me to become an Olympian
myself, though.  Can anyone think of any sports for
unfit lazy people with little commitment and a
disturbing lack of co-ordination?  Me neither.  The
modern pentathalon looked fun.  Very swashbuckling -
horse riding, shooting, fencing, running and one other
that I can't remember.  Errol Flynn would've excelled
at it.  Especially if the other was philandering.

Jen's work experience tales have confirmed all my
worst suspicions about old people.  The cunts. 
They're just as bad when they're on the loose in the
outside world.  Pushing in front of you in bus ques
and stuff.  (Sorry, I know that talking about buses is
such a horrendous cliche round these parts).  A while
back a friend of mine told me that when she's old she
wants all her current friends to meet up and live in
the same old folks home and cause havoc.  Although
obviously not to helpless work experience girls, just
the evil staff.  Best to try to avoid the ones run by
nuns, mind.  This is actually National Old People week
in Britain.  And today's National Poetry Day.  So if
you're an old person who happens to be a poet you're
onto a winner.

John Maxwell enthused: 
"I saw Blue Peter.  That new girl is so much better
than Katy Hill.  I can’t remember her name at the
moment.  She must be the perfect BP presenter.   She
smiles all the time, she’s intelligent-ish, she is 
reasonably good looking, and she’s a good cook."

Sounds like a lovely little wife for you, John!  She
has a very angular haircut as well.  They had a
feature about the Spanish Civil War last night and had
their serious faces on.  Neat-o.

I'm not at all confident that this post isn't just a
total bunch of arse.

Lurve
Ian N.


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