Sinister: waste your time with a q-tip clean...

[Steven Kado]

hello

so i went to new york and bothered some strangers.  they were nice strangers
and didn't really seem to mind.  i also saw some pictures of lynching that
were on display at the ny historical society that almost made me blind.
when i went to 'the' park to recover (from the pictures, the park would have
been no place to escape a picnic [not that i wanted to escape the picnic])
this homeless man walked past and said 'commit suicide, faggot' to me, which
didn't really 'pick me up'.

in fact it did the opposite.

i liked the new york picnic muchly actually, perhaps because no one
suggested i kill myself...big thanks to julie and magmeg for setting the
whole thing up.  its surprising how well emailpeople translate into real
people, but also how different they can be...i suppose that is nothing new
to any other previous picnic types...  in fact thats probably the dumbest
utterance i've knowingly emitted in a long time.  i shall leave it in just
to show you all of just how deep the pit of failure can be.

BEWARE THE PIT OF FAILURE!  IT IS DEEP!

how come we never get picnics going here in th' T(dot)O(dot)?  i mean, they
do picnics in newyork, which means the toronto inferiority complex should
cause us to rush into action and picnic very hard.

if i have my way i'll christen the start of school with a micro picnic
involving me drinking wine in the park when the temperature gets nice around
twilight.  right now i'm naked as chris lampien due to the surprise,
unwelcome, unpleasant heat...so it needs to cool down before i can enter
outside nicely.

the other highlight of the day was that school started!
and it was also the first day of the afternoon tea season!
the school highlight was far and away my wittgenstein teacher who arrived
for the first class really drunk and bumped intothings and yelled loudly in
between mumbling things.  it sounded like this:  mumblemmmmgrrrlslg dasdfjlj
tractatus l;sdjflkurludwr...I DON"T CARE IF WITTGENSTEIN WAS GAY THATS GOT
NOTHING TO DO WITH THINGS lwkdjqiweurolasjdf j DEREK JARMAN
asdlf;lwjeruiasdoifaslkjdf .  he also admited that he didn't really 'get'
wittgenstein's philosophical investigations.  which is refreshingly honest.

then he berated us for not smiling enough.

i love school.  i really do.  i missed it for the 3 weeks i had off since
finishing architecture in the summer.


and then Lawrence Mikkelsen let rip with:
> And you are talking to a BIG Brian Wilson here.

which is confusing for two reasons:
1) saying a large brian wilson is about as silly as saying a large orson
welles.  there aren't really any other kinds
2) i thought lawrence was a lawrence, not a brian wilson.

oh well.

for the record smile (as i've heard it in bootlegs) is a complete and utter
mess in a bad way.
andreas dorau and die marinas are really good tho.  way better than the
fuggin beatles who everyone loves and who i love too, but see little point
in trying to get a masters degree out of.  ahem!

what is the word hermantics about?  i just heard it in a fall song.
its dark in this pit of failure...

s t e v e    n


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