Sinister: If You're Feeling Lazy Fold Your 3.6.9 Strap Tiger, You Walk Like a Legal Line-Painter on Wheels

[sgazzetti]

Yeah, the New York picnic was blrrbrll! What  fun it was, though, as is
customary in posts of this nature, I have to include the obligatory "wish
I had been more sociable" bit. But still, the folks I did meet were all
shiny and sparkly and nice, and I am sure that all the others were the
same--I should have gone around a bit more, rather than confining myself
to the exotic Asian fruits section. I have to give a special thanks to the
not-noticeably-inebriated Julie for posting such fine phallocentric
directions, without which I'd've spent the day wandering the Great Lawn
looking for cardie-wearers, not bloody likely with the hot weather we had.
And to commend Oon for actually getting up from her deep sleep to come
over and very outgoingly introduce herself to our little Asian fruit
subgroup, as well as offering some well-heeded advice regarding mixing and
lemon vodka and durian/lychees. And while on that topic again I need to
apologize for the Durian Debacle. I had really heard great things about
it. As it thawed the odor worsened, if that sounds possible to those who
were brave enough to try it while still semi-frozen (the durian, not the
people). But something exciting happened later: the special bamboo durian
spatula I brought just for the occasion took on a smell less like bad
onion/jockstrap/rotting flesh over the course of the evening, and
presently came to smell like almonds, vanilla, and butterscotch. As well
as a faint hint of durian, unfortunately. Still, sorry. I promise not to
bring durian to any more picnics, ever. In fact, maybe we should issue a
general B&S moratorium on durian.
One other thing, NY picnickers: I was instructed by Miss L. Llew to act as
her ambassador, proffering her regrets, etc, at not being able to attend
(though it is my understanding that she ne regrette rien, really) and I
entirely forgot to speak for her, so appalled was I by the ungodly durian
stench.
Another reason I have for posting now, non-picnic-related, is about the
whole tautology thread of last month. I have finally gotten the answers to
the riddles, aided at the eleventh hour ("but these go to eleven") by
really very specific hints from the friend who originally posed the riddle
(who, by the way, is not on the list, but saw in the archives that Nick
Dastoor had said:
>I'd say your friend isn't half as clever as you think and the oxymoron is
probably 'Summer in winter, winter in springtime' after all.>
She was not all that pleased at hearing how half-clever she apparently
is--smart enough I guess to coax drosophilae to sprout wings while
simultaneously chatting on Jeepy in the laboratory. For those who ever
were and/or still are interested in the riddle, here are her clues:
>looking for one oxymoron and a tautology in an ocean of lyrics isn't very
easy. So... hints... the oxymoron is on an ep; and the tautology, on an
lp. the tautology is in the title song of an lp, in fact...The oxymoron is
in a song about a girl who probably appears in more B&S songs than any
other. In one song, she has been abused, in another she is kissing men,
and finally, she learned alot from putting on a blindfold. The song with
the oxymoron is none of these, but it is all about this particular
character>
Good hints, eh? So soon I'll post her answers, though I imagine that with
these clues anyone/everyone who might possibly still give a tinker's cuss
about this will have sussed out the answers. Armed with these clues it
took me about  seven minutes, perfectly stationary, to succeed, as opposed
to many hours, covering 436 miles, to fail entirely. By the way, another
friend at the picnic, not too familiar with IYFS, thought the tautology
might well be "me and the midget don't see eye to eye." I think that that
one belongs firmly filed under "lemon-vodka-enhanced entertaining
mishearings."

Thanks again, NYC picnic organizers/attenders and durian tryers!
JD Stephens/schatz


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