Sinister: Lazy Line Primitive Painter Loving Llew

[Laura Llew]

Aww, I feel sorry for all those who had to slave over the holidays as I 
greedily popped jelly beans in my mouth one by one. Mmm so sad. Of course, 
Elena, you could be thankful that you didn't get the same reward for your 
work that Jesus got for his. Of course, if Christ was in my business he 
would have at least used that cross as effective advertising space as he 
carried it up the hill. Not that I can fault his publicity plan since his 
book is the most published one in existence...

Here in the states Easter has already been forgoteen seeing as it's the last 
day to file one's taxes. Along with sticking all of my money in an IRA today 
(deduct me, baby), I'm barely sliding my return in before the deadline. 
Instead of considering myself as lazy, I like to think I'm perfecting skills 
which I will use my entire life - mainly that of procrastinating and 
rationalization.

David Moore reminds me of Pappy Maverick a bit so I won't be hurt that he 
made fun of me. I'll just pretend he said something like, "Never cry over 
spilt milk. It could've been whiskey" or "Stay clear of weddings because one 
of them is liable to be your own." However, I have been getting a couple of 
questions about the
       *****TRANSATLANTIC MIX TAPE CHALLENGE 2001*****
so I thought I would clear some things up:
1. Yes, Jason "Jim Crow" McKinnon was right. There will be a separate but 
equal contest for CD mixes as well. Though there are completely different 
rules to making mix cds than mix tapes.
2. For those who have been worrying about the time factor (Peter Carter, 
Sweetie, Mr. Meskers) - don't. The deadline is whenever I get enough tapes 
to judge and no one else is saying there going to send another in. Of 
course, also follow the advice of Zippy's father and "don't dawdle".

I'm glad that Sam has rejoined us, even if it was because of a nasty skiing 
incident. It seems as if they have been all the rage lately and I hope that 
Jer and Rob Brennan are feeling better from their snow related mishaps as 
well. I think it all goes to show you that winter sports are OF THE DEVIL. I 
know this from firsthand experience when three of my male (AKA evil) friends 
persuaded me to go snowboarding with them in Sun Valley, Idaho. My first 
warning was that the infamous Bald Mountain has ski runs cut out so that it 
spells RIP.
Why didn't I run?
My second signal is that these friends are the ones who are always trying to 
involve me in activities which always cause me concussions (ie- hiking in 
canyons where humans shouldn't go, rockclimbing, etc). Why didn't I hide?
I had been snow-shoeing the previous winter and it turned out all right. In 
fact, I loved it! I even ended up in Bruce Willis's backyard (though I said 
if I ever retold that story that I would end up in his living room sipping 
hot chocolate.) So, I go out with them. Usually when I go sledding I end up 
tromping up the snowy bank once, sneaking the book I had in my pocket out, 
and sitting on a stolen inner tube reading in the snow while everyone else 
sleds. With everything being white, it's absolutely gorgeous. However, no 
one else likes this approach. This was my first time snowboarding and more 
of an introductory course (Laura's bum meet the frigid Snow. Icy Cold snow 
meet Laura's behind. Play nice since you'll be spending a lot of time 
together). It all ended with me having a bloody face and yet another 
concussion. To be honest (I'm not a boy so isn't hard for me to be that), I 
didn't actually get injured WHILE snowboarding. However, someone once 
overheard me discussing how exactly I did get hurt to another friend and 
they found it so funny they dropped on the floor convulsing with the 
laughter. After that, I swore I would never tell anyone how it really 
happened. So, I still maintain my original story that I was coming down when 
that baby stroller appeared from no where....

Speaking of illness and injury, I believe I have developed a syndrome. Not 
Tourette's per se but something akin to it. Every time I meet or see a girl 
named Adrian I completely want to yell her name out Rocky style. This is a 
curse!! Today, I'm getting my blood drawn by this kindly girl who is quietly 
humming as she shoves a sharp needle into my arm.* I'm trying not to look at 
my blood go into the little tube when I glance up to see IT. Right there on 
a small gold rectangle.  "Adrianne."  It was all I could do to restrain 
myself from leaping up, throwing my arms over my head and shouting 
ADDDRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIANNNEEEE! which with the blood and needle involved would 
not have painted a pretty picture.

Wasn't Sly Stallone in porn film? Don't worry I'm not going to recount my 
tales of me, Jewel Shepard, and the velour padded bra disco lounge again. 
Even if Vu did a lovely drawing of it. I always like Vu's drawings except 
when I'm in them. I think he gets his feelings hurt because I never like how 
he draws me but it has nothing to do with his abilities. Evidently, he says 
he can't post this one since I've already been drawn. I guess there's a rule 
or something. I say no one knows what I look like and so it's not as if the 
drawings will look alike. Go for it! Heh. Though I keep getting told by 
those who do know me that I look like the bass player from the Aislers Set, 
especially my smile. I've looked for pictures on-line but i couldn't find 
any and since I've only heard of them from Sinister posts - I don't know. I 
probably shouldn't say this since I don't have any idea what the girl looks 
like and she could be the type to make you want to hide under your bed 
(though that would be ace!). So, if anyone has a picture of her could you 
please send it my way so I know who is going around stealing my face. How 
big a girl is she? I wonder if I could take her?

*thinks of Kim Deal*

Those bass players can be pretty scrappy....

Laura

* No, Ree, there was no lolli involved. Unfortunately.
PS - Requisite Dorothy Parker bit: "Once in her long-running feud with Clare 
Boothe Luce, Mrs. Luce held the door open for Mrs. Parker to walk through 
and said, 'Age before beauty.' Mrs. Parker walked through and said, 'Pearls 
before swine.' Another time, when told that Mrs. Luce was kind to her 
inferiors, Dorothy said, 'And where does she find them?"
PPS - Why does Lisa get all the fun? No one has been throwing long, tall, 
rather attractive b&s fans at me!
PPPS - Steve you've been biggin up your team so much that I've decided to 
see them in Baltimore on Wednesday. You best be praying they perform well. 
I'm surprised you haven't entered in the mix tape contest yet. Not that I 
know about your mixin' abilities, but I figure that anyone who likes 
Maryland's athletic teams has to be pretty good about talkin trash when he 
can't necesarrily back up his words with action. hehe

*scampers off before steve can thwack her*

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