Sinister: In a beach tree rudely carved, NC loved me.

[Peter Carter]

Well, for some reason everyone always breaks up with me just before VD
(apart from last year, but that girl is a horrible, foul thing that lurks
under rocks, as I later discovered), and it happened again a couple of weeks
ago after 7 months. So, I went out last night, expecting to either find some
girl at random, get drunk, or be depressed, most likely some combination of
all three.

What I found, apon going to a club with 2 single friends (both female), and
one whos boyfriend is away, is that a reasonable time can be had without any
of these things, reasonable, not good, and I have no idea why it was
reasonable, because on paper it looks shitty. I spent most of the night
looking for vaguely indie/hippie looking girls, with a maximum of two
fitting the category, and then only in the broadest possible sense... I hate
the clubs in bath, I see loads of attractive indie/hippie girls in the
street, but then I go into a club and there don't appear to be any... mind
you, seeing as I usually stay in the union bar myself... Anyway, I'm not
being shallow, I wouldn't only go out with indie/hippie girls, but they are
nicer to look at and tend to have more interest in me (fitting, as I do,
somewhere in the vague range between indie, hippie and habitual sex
offender). What I did get is some drunken irish guys having an un-invited
conversation, about nuclear power of all things, for about an hours, while
constantly sitting too close.

It didn't really help that two out of the three girls I was with proclaimed
that they could never go out with a guy with long hair, which I have (not
that I have any interest in them at all, it was just a little annoying).

Oh, and to top it all, I usually live near enough to Manchester that I could
go down there to see the Electric Honey thing, but now I'm at uni in bath,
damn, damn, damn. [note belle and sebastian content :)]

Anyway, back to valantines day... in poetry class, for the creative writing
half of my degree, we were asked to write a love poem, I came up with
this...


Visiting Rachael in Leicester


The evening was used up
crying, for your attention,
you were distracted by a friend, more dramatic
than even me, allowed me an appendage
to squeeze at, to press your fingers together like a raft.
Leaving with me, to comfort, I thought
you were kindness, in a dull room
your mouth took me away.

The morning began like a cliff,
leaning forward, waiting to feel something solid,
falling. Not noticing
at first I pulled at a loose woollen thread,
held on like a life rope, hoping
I could turn your head to me.
Your friends were mocking
the dark red marks above a shirt I had found
too small. Only once could I touch you,
then only briefly, as the taxi arrived
to take me away.

The train was death, simple
as a passage to God. Blurred like ghosts,
street lights, house lights stumbled past
and a knoll trembled though the black
plastic in my ear. Home was not
where I wanted it to be.


not that I'm bitter or anything... ho hum. (that isn't about the recent one,
that's about my first love)

I've been listening to Dog on Wheels E.P. a lot recently, for some reason,
that and Elephant Shoe by Arab Strap. All good. Elephant Shoe is depressing.
Why do I never meet any B&S fans?

"...and of course everyone felt appropriately shocked and saddened by the
women's affliction..."

The Happy Reaper

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