Sinister: a laughing matter.

[IsabelLark at xxx.com]

Today I feel like an Arab Strap song...all raspy and sexy...all drinking and 
bed wetting. all abusing and misusing. all dirty and molesting. all fondling 
my balls in your name...all calling you out as a game. 

Anyway, back to this matador thing. I bought a couple of compilations (which 
i rarely do, but 5 CDs  for twenty dollars...a bargain) Anyway, I wondered 
for a while why there wasn't any Belle and Sebastian on any of them. I mean 
Arab Strap is on there even. I understand that there was some sort of hiatus 
between the two, but I thought it was rather brief...so brief that B & S 
could have been on one or both sets. Let me know if you know cause its this 
sorta thing that keeps me up at night (not really.)

Last night on HBO, I watched this show "Reverb" which had Built to Spill and 
Pavement. It was awesome. I was pumped up and ready to rock at like 2 in the 
morning....not a good thing, but not bad either.  Pavement, oh Pavement, what 
happened? Steven was talking on about the highlights of touring and one of 
which sitting down to eat a good meal together. I thought that was so sweet.  
In all that you do, having something as simple as a good meal with people 
that you genuinely like...we should all hope that something so small could be 
so wonderful. Did you know that Steve and Steven used to be security guards 
together in a new york museum? I thought that was clever too. 

Right now I am listening to my comp CD...which has a slow live version of 
sugarcube (ylt)....so beautiful. I saw them live a couple of months ago...it 
was the best show I have ever seen. but I saw them with an ex-beau of mine. 
it's best to see shows with good platonic friends, I think...so when the 
relationship goes down the drain you dont have to be reminded of it everytime 
you listen to a band or whatnot. Incidentally, I wrote him a letter that I 
never sent. It's ugly, but I want to share it with you anyway....just to show 
you what I mean by this Arab Strap mode of mine.

it read like this:

'You're nothing but a joke to me. Someone to manipulate. silly putty comes to 
mind everytime I think of you. A joke and nothing more. you would do better 
to never allow me to talk to you again, but you always do. And I just 
couldn't care less...closure means nothing to me...it never has. 

And you may struggle with some witty reply, but I am the one that holds the 
score card anyway. So nothing that you can do or say is going to make you 
better than what you are right now. and what you are right now is not much. 

So now here is what you do:

Member directory search and find another one...a joke like you must 
occasionally have some fun.

and to answer that nagging question that comes while you jerk off. "no, you 
never were"

So fuck you...not tonight not ever again. You're not worth the waste of wet.

thanks for the laughs. '

Incidentally, I never sent it...cause truth be known he is the one that broke 
my heart...and not the other way around...and he is the one that holds the 
card for score keeping. but it's fun to pretend, you know.  


Anyway, I hope Sunday finds you all doing something wonderful or nothing at 
all, but nothing , I mean nothing, inbetween the two.

Yours,
Isabel Lark
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