Sinister: Shoot the textual parakeet

[Ken Chu]

Hello,

I have reached a personal landmark in my life yesterday, erm, besides
drinking the 10,000th ever can of Red Bull*, that is, I have absolutely run
out of money.  The bank machine gave me a very friendly message saying "Your
request has been denied by your bank" when I tried to take out cash, which
was nice.  Of course, I was in the middle of London then (post-RAH) and had
no money to get home.

A very kind sinister person, after I busked with my freeform version of
Wonderwall by Oasis, lent me 15 quid for a train across the ocean, um I
meant the bit of grass in between London and Milton Keynes, so I'm home
again and possibly not going out for a while before I find some way of
replenishing the bank account, and I still owe another kind sinister person
money for the RAH ticket itself arrrgh.

RAH! tho, was like well good, on the top of RAH there was even a curtain
thing with a logo on it which says... "RAH!", on it (I think it was without
an exclamation mark tho).  Which was funny, slightly lower than that all
around are the stalls where people sit really high up.  By the end of the
evening a lot of them decided to stand up there anyway and dance, I feared
for their safety cos I believe when they built the Royal Albert Hall they
didn't anticipate people to want to dance up there so they didn't put in any
barriers, and the people there dancing look quite drunk.

Hmmmmm Monica Queen was there again for a Lazy Line Painter Jane encore and
she was great and was live and kicking and boxing.

The John Peel session was great, after a very kind sinister person lent it
to me, and Sturan's girl probably does have a miraculous technique in order
to make him to churn out this fountain of love, ahem, that's a metaphor for
a good tune, of course.

The pre- and post-RAH picnics were great fun too, drinking first vodka and
Red Bull and then cheap wine, and playing footie in Greenwich and won
woohoo, and getting expert babysitting tips from fellow sinisters, if I have
a brother I will now know exactly how to look after him hehe :-).

Then watched Camera Obscura at the Spitz and they were great, they played
80s Fan which was a great song so we celebrated at the end by doing "80's
dancing" moves which involved pretending to hold a cigarette and chewing a
piece of gum and bopping your head.  I hope to see more list mummy dancing
soon!

Oh the poetry parrot has flown into my window, and started singing something
about feeling happy for a day in 1975, scared the shit out of me but I'm
okay now after brutalising it and shoved it in a cage, before you call the
RSPB, I didn't really brutalise the parrot, I love birds, they taste lovely.

Really I didn't do anything bad to it, apart from tying a string to its leg
and then yanked it backwards, just so that I can tell people I just pulled a
bird.

Centre of Town by Karen E Norman
============================
The centre of this town really sucks
It's concrete and smelly and full of muck
yuck, just my luck,
I stepped over a patch and now it's stuck

The centre of this town really sucks
it's just a load of roads and full of trucks
cluck, the driver shrugs
as one hits you like a hockey puck

The centre of this town really sucks
it's bland and it's dull and full of shmucks
you duck, as stones are chucked
they're starting a riot and running amuck.

A stone is thrown towards the front of Starbucks
as the anarchists got infiltrated by a ruck of thugs
The town burns, but you don't quite give a fuck
cos the centre of this town really sucks

<The End>

The parrot after I recited this poem to him had realised that Milton Keynes
really sucks, and flew up the M1 to Leicester towards miss Madeleine McNeil.

Poems and Red Bulls
Ken
* it probably wasn't the 10,000th can exactly but it was close, and it was
kindly bought by another lovely sinister person.  I am such a scrounger.

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