Sinister: Ps. I have never kissed the editor of Radio Times

[JENOWL22 at xxx.com]

Hewwo,

Firstly, thank all for replying to my Monty Python question. In fact (this is 
the amazing bit), there were quite a lot of replies. So I decided to put them 
up on my website.  You can find all the answers so far at 
http://www.angelfire.com/weird/mmmhowqueer/index.html. It also includes Bob 
the Wasp, and my puritan Ribena views. Not that you wanted to read that.

But please also still send replies, cause that was only the ones I got after 
a day. 

soph asked innocently:
<<it's *apple* ribena!! (what do 'bena purists feel about the new flavours? 
jenowl?) >>

And I burst a blood vessel. No, it didn't really. But the thing with 
non-blackcurrant flavoured Ribena is, it's wronger than wrong. If you were to 
combine Eminem lyrics with Cardinal Winning, pour with George Bush sauce, 
sprinkle lightly with a ground copy of the News of the World and microwave it 
in Hell to the tune of Who Let the Dogs Out until it simmered gently, then 
fed it to Anne Robinson and got her to vomit it back up, you still couldn't 
get a worse thing than non-blackcurrant flavour Ribena. And as for Toothkind 
and Light, it's not Ribena, it's wee. Even Blackcurrant. It's a perversion of 
the sacred ribena berries, and all they stand for.  

Ok, i'll stop now. Before the pretty white van with the soft walls comes to 
swallow me up.

I had to trail around shoe shops with the blonde for hours today after 
school. So I ran off with one of her shoes, while she was trying sandals on. 
It was a red knee high boot with a six inch heel, and i did a little dance 
with it. But she couldnt run after me on account of her having one boot on, 
making her look like she had one leg shorter than the other.

I had a debate last night, and we lost. I was gutted. I've only ever lost one 
debate before and it was the final of my first ever tournament, when I was 
13. And we lost to the guy that pinched my bum while I was talking to the 
judges at the last debate. I was rather cross. Especially since even the 
teams that went through's coaches came up and apologised and said you should 
have won", and the presiding judge said we were better than St Aloyisius and 
should have gone through. Still, I consoled myself by taking all my fizziness 
out on a St Als pupil who insulted the blonde. I looked her up and down,  
frowned and said "The St Aloyisius uniform is terrible dowdy, don't you 
think". Man, she wasn't happy. She'd never heard of B&S either, and went on 
for half an hour about how indie she was for liking Morcheeba. I'm turning 
into a hard kid, I swear.

The blonde died her hair auburn the other week. She said 'I was hoping it 
would turn out your colour', but it never. It turned out kind of orange with 
blonde patches. so her gran made her bleach it back, but now it's sort of 
blonde with orange patches. Oooh, the poor soul. 

I always wondered what would happen it B&S did the Star Wars soundtrack. It 
would be quite scary, to be honest. Like "Monday morning wake up knowing that 
you've got to clean the droids..." or "I fought in an intergallactic battle 
between the empire and the rebell alliance...". Or equally not-witty or 
unamusing things.

I keep having dreams about Baxendale. Maybe I've been drinking too much 
Ribena before I go to bed. Nah, you can never drink too much Ribena. Unless 
yr Desmond and it makes you vomit. But that must be a genetical flaw, so I 
won't blow up his house or anything. I'm not a psycopath, really, but there's 
not telling what i'll do once I've got a few ribena's in me.

Ooh, I meant to say, remember the B&S auction? Someone (holly I think) won my 
scarf, and I wonder if she could mail me and let me know if she still wants 
it? And in what colours and stuff.

I did a talk in English about George Bush being stupid and everyone laughed 
and thought it was good, except for the boys in the front row, who booed. 

I don't like hard kids, they keep throwing ice and stones and me and it's 
sore.

Hugs,
Jen

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