Sinister: I drink like Ian Beale

[Craig]

It's shocking but true, I could barely believe it myself.

The guardians of all that is good and pure in this crazy crazy world,
Guinness Breweries plc have invested a vast sum of monies in studying the
way we drink and it seems I'm very much the protective over-pint-huncher.
Anyway for those with way too much time of their hands feel free to evaluate
your current drinking style at


http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/dynamic/food/review.html?in_review_id=369265&i
n_review_text_id=314654

Ian Beale.... pah, it'll never happen.

Anyway "Hi again Sinister" is must be about 6 months since I last posted, I
went away and had to unsub for a month or so and are only now just getting
back into the swing of things but it's good to be back. I've missed out on
lots though so will have to fight the nagging feeling of incompleteness I
sometimes get when I'm not 100% sure what's going on or where I am.

I never quite got around to listening to Chris's MP3s, but I guess if the
band and Jeep'sta didn't want the MP3s circulating then that's fine as they
pretty much own them. Isn't the standard ROCK response to dodgy quality
bootlegs to release an official live recording ?, I certainly hope that
happens one day but right now I'm just excited about all this talk of live
dates as I've missed out the last few times they've played in London,
admittedly due to poor planning on my part. I always arrange holidays when a
band I like is touring and unfortunately airlines take a dim view of people
trying to claim refunds "cos the Gentle Waves are in town", Hefner are of
course a totally different kettle of fish.

Various lovely people have been talking about con-persons, well completely
by accident I think I've come across the perfect defence - pretend you're
French. You might scoff but it really does work & the only thing you've got
to watch out for is the ever present danger that the con-er speaks better
French than the you (which sadly in my case means anyone who can spell
"croissant" without the aid of a spellchecker) so I recommend having another
more obscure nationality ready to fall back on, something South American
perhaps ?. The success rate for this clever ruse is direct related to the
distance you are away from France so it's iffy at best in much of Western
Europe , but never fails in the US of A.

I received an email today from a pal which somehow got me thinking how I'd
like to end up as an old codger. Obviously we can't all be John Peel, for
starters there's just no demand for a million of them and I think Carsmile
Steve has received a formal offer so the rest of us are plain out of luck,
so instead I've decided to be Rod Stewart.

It had to be someone who's slightly cheeky and a wee bit of a hit with the
laydees, I briefly considered Peter Stringfellow but he's just too tacky and
lacks Rod's sophistication and massive popular appeal. So it's all decided
then, when I hit 45 (thankfully many years away) I'll trade in my jeans and
t-shirts for classy well tailored suits and before you know it I'll be
fighting off Super Models and fledgling Hollywood Starlets. I'm quite
looking forward to it.

There may also be a brief flirtation with classic Oliver Reed-dom... but I'm
still undecided on that.

Ok I must go before I outstay my welcome. Thanks for having me, anyone need
a hand with the washing up ?

Craig x





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