Sinister: You're once, twice, three times Slim Shady

[Lucy Alder]

RIBENA DRINKERS, YOU BASTARDS, YOU ARE KILLING ICKLE PUPPIES!

Kara Jean sent her first post and wrote

> I like cheese.  Be my friend.

I'll be friends with anybody who likes cheese.  What's the king of
cheeses?  I like it blue - gorgonzola or stilton at room temperature.  No
crackers for me!  I'd rather eat it by the chunk.  Mmmmm, cheese.  If I
could only eat one food for the rest of my life it would be cheese. 
Ricotta for breakfast, grilled chevre for lunch and a giant slab of extra
mature cheddar before bed.  Cheese before bedtime never gave me
nightmares, only sweet dreams of love.  Speaking of which...

Struan makes a great roadie.  Several times, he took it upon himself to
turn his back to the audience, then bend over to fiddle with his cable. 
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we got a prime view of his arse.  It's a bit on
the small side - personally, I like a bum I can grab - but it's not
unpleasant and the elasticated waistband of his trousers formed delicate
pleats across his cheeks.  I can't believe I'm writing this.  Sod it,
onwards...  I can also confirm that Struan has lovely hands.  Fairly small
and perfectly formed, his manicured fingertips are obvious testiment to
regular use of the nailbrush and possibly even an emery board.  Most other
details, I believe, have already been supplied by Mr Moore.  Speaking of
which...

David Moore said 

> Strange Fruit's music policy is described as "Off-kilter indie". Ask
> Lucy
> whether off-kilter is an adjective or a noun ;)

*Definitely* a noun.  I'd like to see B&S do some off-kilting.  Struan,
Stevie, Isobel and Sarah line up at the front, swaying their hips and
clicking their fingers in time to TBWTAS when swoosh!  The boys whip away
the girls' kilts in the style of Bucks Fizz.  I think that would go down a
storm, don't you?  Speaking of which...

Camera Obscura did a storming gig.  I urge anyone with anything resembling
decent musical taste (and that's all of you, obviously, because you all
like my favourite band) to go out and buy anything they can get their
hands on.  Also, watch out for the video for the forthcoming single -
certain members of this list placed successful bids to appear in it in the
auction a couple of months back.  While on the subject of Saturday's gig,
I should pay homage to the Lollies' keyboard player, who proved herself to
be the Toni Braxton of indie by wearing a frock split so high up the sides
you could actually see her arse.  Really!  That brazen hussy!  I can't end
this paragraph with 'speaking of which...' because I am about to write my
name.

Juicy Lucy

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