Sinister: Shoes

[Robin Stout]

Hello, my name's Robin Stout

Sarah: "Robin, are you a weatherman yet?". No, not yet, I'm going to 
TV Centre on Wednesday for a Popstars-style audition. I'll tell you 
what happens then. It will probably be a tale of humiliation and woe, 
tragedy and romance, rain and sunny spells, warming up later.

I've gone rather overboard and bought four tickets for the Royal 
Albert Hall. The woman on the phone said they were "at the back". I 
hope this doesn't mean behind Big Stu. There should be an option 
on the website for "Not behind Big Stu", so if you end up watching 
the concert around Stu's ears you get a reduction. Or they could give 
you big shoes, like in a bowling alley, Big Stu Shoes, so you can 
see over his head.

A friend of mine bet 2 pounds on Liverpool winning the treble and  
won 104 pounds. I bet 50p on France winning Eurovision and won 
nothing. Where's the justice in the world?

Like Jesus, I think the best way to understand life's problems is to 
tell stories. Here's a little parable, based on a real life event, called 
Robin and the Egg. Maybe it can help cast light into our dark and 
meaningless lives. Or maybe it's just rubbish.


Robin and the Egg

Yesterday I bought an egg. Just the one, for a meal I was cooking. I 
bought it from the shop on the corner, where the people are all 
miserable, and it cost me 25p.

I carried it home, cradling it in my hands. I skillfully dodged the six 
delinquent kids from two houses down who were riding their bikes 
on the pavement. I deftly tiptoed past a man in a puffa jacket who 
was strutting down the street with his elbows out. When I was back, I 
slid through the door, and gently placed the egg on the kitchen table.

Then I went to get a bowl, and I turned, and the egg rolled slowly 
from the counter and fell on the floor.

I tried to catch it, but I was never any good at cricket. All I had left 
was bits of eggshell, and a mess on the floor.

A moral lesson for us all, I think, um, put eggs in eggcups, or 
something.



Robin.
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