Sinister: Drinking just for practice

[JAMES GILMER]

Ouch.

I got my yearly flu shot today. It didn't hurt really, but there's a sort of 
dull ache in the muscle now that's letting me know my arm's a bit annoyed at 
being used for typing.

Anyways, onto things that matter.

I love it when people talk about what B&S songs mean to them or what they 
think are meant by the lyrics, because a big appeal of B&S are their lyrics, 
and the many ways they can be taken.

Youn mentioned "Judy and the Dream of Horses", which is one of my favorite 
songs really, and said: "If you show me everything, then it will be as 
though, all along, I didn't know you."  So it could be a wish to be spared 
confessions, but perhaps, more than that, a comment on the impossibility of 
ever completely knowing another person"

So, I have to chime in with what Judy means to me. The narrator (the singer) 
is talking about a girl the singer knew (judy) and how she used to make him 
laugh when they were younger, maybe when they were children, but now it's 
later and Judy isn't making him laugh, she's writing sad songs and showing 
them to other boys (or maybe, to him, maybe he's the boy in school she shows 
it to).

So, Judy steals a book and has a dream about stealing horses and riding away 
(away from her life? away from school?), so I take it that Judy isn't very 
happy. She's walking the streets and there's no boys or girls that can make 
her happy, and she wants to be away from it all because she dreams of 
stealing a horse and getting away.

The boy doesn't want sad Judy, he wants the girl he used to know (or thought 
he knew), because he wants her to make him happy. He's built this image up 
in his mind of who Judy is/should be, and he wants her to be his friend and 
make him happy, and he doesn't even seem to want Judy to be his lover 
because nothing will happen on the picnic.

Poor bugger's built this image of Judy in his head, a Judy he's sure he 
knows, and if the real Judy pours out all her unhappiness, tells him how she 
really feels, then his image gets shattered, and he never really knew her.

It's a failing we all have. We build these images of 
lovers/friends/strangers in our heads and it just shatters us when we find 
out they aren't true. That the sweet girl isn't as sweet as you thought she 
was, that the nice boy wasn't as nice as you thought he was, that the person 
that you thought believed in true love was just another user, etc.

Which I suppose leads me into the area of list crushes. I think they're a 
bit silly myself, but there's no doubting that wonderful people who are 
perfect for each other who might have never of met have been brought 
together by the list. Whether as friends or something more, it doesn't 
matter, I know I've made some great friends because of the list, a few I 
haven't even met.

Here's the rub though, it's hard enough to find someone you're compatible 
with in real life, on the web I'd think it be even harder. Plus, when I 
think about the things that attract me to people I've loved in the past, a 
lot of it is stuff I'd never know from the rather impersonal nature of the 
net.

There was one girl I fell madly in love with because of the way she smiled, 
and the impression of Kimba from THE LION KING that'd she'd do. I'd always 
liked her alright, but when I heard her laugh and she gave a growl and did 
that Kimba, ouch, I was head over heels.

Hell, I once had a girl tell me she fell in love with me because of the way 
I held hands.

Those are the things you can't explain, that's where the love is, trying to 
explain to strangers why something as silly as a Kimba impersonation should 
make you fall in love with someone is useless, because it doesn't make 
sense. That's the really brilliant thing about love.

It's the little things that really make you fall in love with a person, the 
real things, and on the net I've seen too many people build up an image of 
someone they fancied over email only to have it shattered when they hit the 
real life things, as Amy Longcore said: "nothing prepares you for the 
persons glance, religous stances, political
beliefs, belching, farting, secret blue oyster cult obsessions ...". I 
pretty much concur with Miss Longcore's feelings on the crush list.

Everyone's looking to find a bloody epic love story, and sometimes you do, 
but most times love's a quiet thing, not as epic as you've been told. All 
you people going on about how you've never felt REAL love, sure you have. 
Real love isn't fireworks and thunder, it's Kimba impersonations and holding 
hands, and just bloody getting on.

Rachel Fruitloop said; "Jim...you are REALLY SWEET, you know! I'm a fan!" 
Ahh, I do feel like a star now, and I even have my first fan. Your fanclub 
t-shirt and membership badge/secret decoder ring will go out in the post 
tomorrow :P

Shouts out to the lovely Elise, her brilliant other half Sean, ~stine, 
Nikki, and the rest of the Chicago crew, and a loud shout to our long absent 
lovely Llew.

oh, and a 'meepmeep' to Miss Kenyon out there at her new job.

Today's amusing webpage: "Cleaning the fucking kitchen...For Dummies"

http://www.fridgemagnet.org.uk/kitchen.html

Punk Rock \m/

Jim

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