Sinister: Never fool with fireworks

[robin stout]

On my way to the shop to buy some milk I passed some kids. "S'cuse me sir. 
Can you spare a penny for the guy?" The "guy" was a stuffed sack in a 
wheelchair, with some socks stuck onto it. It was horrible. I gave the young 
scamp a clip round the ear. No, actually I just ran away.

For Halloween the goths in the neighbourhood had a dress down day and hung 
about town wearing "slacks" and "jumpers" while everyone else tried to be 
scary. I went for the Lovejoy look.

Before I went to see Belle and Sebastian at the Royal Albert Hall I devised 
a system to help me remember how the new songs went. It was all to do with 
whether the next note was higher or lower than the last. Deceptively simple, 
like musical braille. Of course it didn't work at all. The next day I tried 
to remember how the songs went and got them completely wrong. "La la la... I 
love my car, I love my.. Oh no that's 'Lady In Red', let's try again..." So 
when I hear the new single it will be like hearing those songs for the first 
time. That's not a bad thing really, it it? I always enjoy the shock of the 
new. Or do I mean nude?

I took music GCSE, believe it or not, and I was so hopeless that everything 
I wrote sounded like a nursery rhyme. I ended up calling one of my 
composition pieces "The Jolly Pumpkin Man" to pretend it was supposed to 
sound that way. My two compositions were;

1. The Jolly Pumpkin Man
2. Music in a "Gamelan" style

Like I said, I was rubbish. Luckily we were all rubbish - someone I knew 
played "The Theme From Howard's Way" on the organ. He was rubbish. Someone 
else sang "The Wind Beneath My Wings". She was rubbish. I imagine everyone 
else in the country was rubbish too, because I got a B. I didn't deserve it.

I'm rambling now. On to something slightly more relevant...

I emailed jeepster today asking if they sell records with press-out centres 
for a jukebox. They don't, so... Does anyone know a Do It Yourself way of 
making these? Tell me if you do, it would be very helpful.

Thanks for the flood of emails to my Information Service, by the way. I'm 
always here to help! Keep 'em coming!

Robin.

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