Sinister: falling is fun

[Danny Farrell]

hello my wee lovelies,

I started this message by pasting most of Dimitra's post but then i realised 
that my contribution was limited pretty much to "yes","that's right" and "i 
agree totally" so i decided i couldn't do that. I still want to talk about 
love and list crushes though so whatever can i do?

Well we've had a lot of mixed reviews and a rather biased view on 
list-crushes and we have had the lovely lindsey baker be disillusioned and 
other lovely people be bitter and sad:

"Lindsey you must not think like this", the same goes for anyone else who is 
bitter or sad or disullisioned,except change the Lindsey bit.

Yes everyone can get very badly burned by love but the only reason it hurts 
so much is because having it is so beautiful and dare i say yummy. If love 
wasn't transcendentally beautiful then people hurt in love would just shrug 
their shoulders and walk away much in the same way as someone who has just 
lost 50 pence, the reason it hurts so much when love fails is because it's 
so beautiful. We should never give up on anything that is beautiful

I read the wonderfully nice JohnJohn's masterplan and how it didn't work and 
that made me think about my friend-girl again. I remember sitting in my room 
hatching a masterplan to woo her over, i decided on a poem rather than a wee 
cute sweetie because i knew she liked poetry. I sat writing it for days and 
it turns out it was actually pretty good although im sure that it'll never 
ever get into any romantic poetry compilations but it was good and just the 
ticket to win over any young girls heart. Anyway i sat down next to her in 
the library one day as i always did, she was a friend back then before she 
became my friend-girl, and as the bell rang for the next class i handed her 
it and ran out and into my next class knowing i wouldn't have to see her for 
a whole day. Anyway the poem actually did work but in the end she brutally 
crushed my heart as she decided to get back with her ex boyfriend. This was 
actually a recurring theme with me and my friend-girl.

Anyway after the first time my friend-girl broke my heart i vowed to give up 
on love and i did for a while until my friend-girl decided she wanted me 
again then broke my heart again and then i gave up on love again. But now im 
happy and like like really happy so the point is you can't give up on love 
no matter how many times your heart gets broken. Life is not a big test,you 
don't get a big medal at the end of, so while we're here we should try and 
be happy and for that while you may not need love, you should never ever 
become bitter and try and hide from love or dismiss it or give up. Something 
will come along,it did for me and im useless,not useless just used less. 
Than other people who are used more. hmmmmm.

I think i'll defend list-crushes by talking about the magic of love. I think 
it was James Gilmer who said it was the little things that matter and that 
love isn't fireworks and thunder and i think he's nearly right. I remember a 
lovely madeliene post a while ago talk about how love was mundane,well thats 
not quite right but it was similar, and it is to an extent but it is magic 
too and life is not a film so it can't all be a big epic love story but 
there are times when love is magical and these times are what make love 
yummy, transcendental special instead of just special.

The magic of love is easily transferable to list-crushes speaking on the 
phone to your crush and then having to run away for ten minutes to try and 
stop your grin reaching your ears so you don't need to explain to your 
friends how someone so far away can make you so happy. It's being so happy 
chatting to them that you can't stop glowing sitting at a computer and then 
maybe even getting up and dancing and then getting soup feet. Its sitting in 
a country park with your friends at 3a.m with B&S playing on a wee ghetto 
blaster with a flask of hot chocolate looking up at a beautiful purple sky. 
Wondering whether your crush is looking at the same sky and then receiving a 
lovely message from them that makes your heart skip a beat and causes your 
friends to enquire what's wrong and why you've went all dreamy.

This is the magic of love, the fairy-tale moments, whatever you would like 
to call them and you don't need physical contact for these just your loved 
one inside you,in your soul.

I have more but i've said enough already

Love, Hugs and Magic

Danny xxx



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