Sinister: Dog on Glue

[DansonHatcher at xxx.com]

    I've been getting up far to early lately,
  my body's well up for getting out of bed and walking about but the 
brainpower needed to perform such a task is still in the land of Zzzzzz 
.  .    .    .  . . . . .. . . . . .  . . . . .   .  .  . . . .  ..  . . .... 
. . . .. . .   
Like last night/this morning I woke up in the dark,
   I put my trousers on but "where the f**k is the zip", it's not there.
      I wonder if perhaps these are my sisters jeans?
    Then I saw the time, (quarter to five!!!) "oh no I can't be doing with 
getting up now"
      and I took off the jeans noticing that I'd put them on the wrong way 
round and went back to bed.
      Now at some point between then and half eight I had a dream about the 
jeans being Levi's and that all I needed to do was twist the rest of my body 
round to match the jeans. (to much telly does this to you)
       Then of couse as I wake up this morning I'm in a bit of a state cos I 
think that last night I'd been in The Exorcist (spinning body parts etc..).
       It sounds so silly now I think about it but at the time I was well 
spooked.

   and this is not the end,
         I heard footsteps coming up the stairs which turn out to be Sally 
the dog,
 after trying to climb in bed with me she got bored and wandered off into my 
sisters room.
   a few minutes later she came back to show me a hairbrush she'd stolen, she 
looked quite proud of herself and found it hard to tell her off and put the 
teethmarked brush back.
           Then I fell asleep
 I woke up again soon after cos Sally licking my arm, it felt really strange, 
not like normal dog tongue/slober/hot breath but all rough and hard instead.
        I looked down at her and the thought "what a mess", she looked like 
she'd eaten some make-up or something and had like strands of white foaming 
dribble hanging out her mouth and into a puddle on the carpet before her.
       
   I went into my Sisters room and the same mess was spread about in there so 
I clambered over the bomb-hit that is her room and on the other side there 
was tube with a leak, it appeared to be moisturiser ,            
 turns out it wasn't a tube of moisturiser but of "Homebase double action", 
me and you would call it superglue and thats why I'm typing with hardened 
fingertips and Sally's got a soap in her mouth.
          What really amazes me is that the lumps of glue that are hardest to 
get off are the bits on her tongue, I wouldn't have thought it would stick 
there very well with it being so wet.
,,,,,,,,,................///////////////ppppppp
    I think the crescendo of fuck up's has just reached it's peak,
   about a minute ago.
      I'm here telling you lot about this morning's events
   and I've just spilt Swiss Style Alpen all down the keyboard.
    Stupid, stupid, stupid.......(repeat to fade)     
                                     
       Check out the animal art....
                                          
                (( ' ' ))                                                
                   'jj'                               
              Elephant
 
     If you've read this FAR you're an absolute STAR!            James.
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