Sinister: Sad sickness - being differents fine but you go all the way to being weird

[Danny Farrell]

Hello lovelies,

Does everyone seem to be really sad and lonenly recently or is it just me? 
It kinda scares me one minute everyone was happy and then suddenly they just 
all got sad and lonely.I think theres some sort of sad virus going around or 
as Dimitra said maybe it's just the weather making people want love more 
tangible, i know it makes me feel that way.

All my nice non-sinister friends are all sad and my bestest friend in the 
whole world is really dejected because he has women trouble and i can't help 
him because i'm really sad too and have women trouble so i just hand him my 
big bottle of vodka and then put on Belle and Sebastian or the smiths and 
that makes it okay for a little while until bedtime, where i just lie and 
think about the futility of it all and i can't sleep unless i play really 
soothing music.

Im sad partly because im lonely but a big part is because i've realised that 
people refuse to accept me for who i am, i think my friends are too normal, 
maybe, but that sounds really horrible.I had a massive argument with my 
friend-girl because i wear my emotions on my sleeve and i tried to explain 
to her that i didn't know how to live differently and i didn't want to but 
she couldn't accept that someone would want to be totally honest in showing 
their emotions. Allegedly living according to your heart rather than your 
head makes you weak and she believes that everyone should just hide all 
their feelings,i can't understand that at all.

I sometimes think it might be grate to be normal and shallow because then i 
could be content and could get all excited about special offers on lager at 
the local superstore and about a new pub opening or even just a party and i 
would never be sad or lonely because i wouldn't even know what those 
feelings were. When im sad i sometimes think that creativity, intelligence 
and individuality are curses and i know that's wrong but normal people 
always seem to be so happy,it's frightening.

Im sorry i wasn't funny, i think thats two in a row now. :)

Hot Choccy and Kuhluas,
                       Danny xxxxx



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