Sinister: Pianta di ampio magnifico Collegio*

[Gordon]

I am between telephone calls. Sometimes politeness is insulting. At
least I could see it coming and it's gratifying to realize that the
people who know me tend to like me and the people who don't take the
time fire me, ever so politely, in offstage monologue. I'd like to be
described as a paranoid eccentric but all I get is office-style fluff. I
even had to telephone for the privilege of receiving so much dust. I
could turn it all around with a few carefully chosen words but why play
in a team? Why play in a team and the captain doesn't know you and
re-assembles stray and ill-researched facts so as to dislike you? I may
have a stange way of manipulating my own truth but I don't need to like
the see-through shambles of someone else's politicalisms.

I suppose I now have some free time. Once I get over the shit I might be
able to do something useful. The sweet perfume of resilliance.
Thing is, I actually like people. But a lion in a cage looking at
visitors of the zoo is not the same as the same lion looking at them in
the midst of the Savannah
Kandahar, Khugiana, Kajakat, Kash, Kang, Kush
Kattawaz

Is no ma' faut! He did it ! It wisnae me!
Aye.

I'm afraid this post is almost delirious, but the new Hefner album's
very good... the gloopy synths are, well, bouncy and melodic. And you
know what? thanks to you lot I now *listen* to lyrics. Well, sometimes.
And I read much more.
But I guess my places remain indescribeable and private.Well, talking of
lyrics,
well I went to this party last night/
a lot of people I hadn't seen in a long time
and they wanted to know about my life,/
but making me feel like it wasn't quite right
like where's your kids and where's your car?
I said I don't have either but I have a guitar
and I ended up feeling like a freak
so I found some wine and something to eat
and I talked to the dog to pass the time

I suppose if I'm sad the nearest escape corridor is entirely abstract.
One imagines being a film director obsessing over glowing extruded
parallelograms: visions of flow and spiritual instability. Visceral:
appealing as much as it appals? Out of control, as the editor of Silicon
Valley's *Wired* magazine entitled his book or the Stock Exchange or the
galloping horse: out of control as in 'not being controlled'?

Irresolution. Openness. Courage; foolhardiness... for each descriptive
appreciation of an action there is a desultory describing exactly the
same action. Such are the barely concealed secrets of rhetoric. Be
aware. Be wary.
I'm letting my mind out on a long leash: giving myself 'a lot of rope'
and, if you've actually read this, I'd suggest that you don't attempt to
make sense of it.
So why post? you might ask. I still am. Asking, that is.
I don't know.

"Will the gentleman standing behind the bush please stand up. Yes, you
sir, Mr. Toby Smythe, of Colefax, West Yorkshire."
"Thankyou for your attention, sir."

BOOM!

;}'

Gordon

[quotes are vaguely misappropriated from ms. Heather Nova and messrs.
Monty Python, all of whose rights have been vaguely unrespected, but
with respects as I am able to proffer]
*Piranesi: evidently the only existant plan from a man famed for his
perpectives of prisons

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