Sinister: Umm, what shite shall bore them with today?.......Oh I know!

[DansonHatcher at xxx.com]

 picniconthe18thpicniconthe18thpicniconthe18thpicniconthe18thpicniconthe18th
  
primrosehillprimrosehillprimrosehillprimrosehillprimrosehillprimrosehillprimro

sehill   

                                It's not a typing error but
                                a secret message that'll
                                    burn itself into your
                                      subconscious. Got that?
                                               Good.

    Hello sinister
 
      This just in..
               Sainsburys 15p bread is no more.
                         They've have replaced it with something of similar 
quality but 
                                  upped the price to 19p,   Bastards!
                        As for Farmhouse loaf, thats just an excuse to make 
bread that falls 
      apart really easy and put 14p on the price over proper bread.           
  
                    
     I may have a new job tomorrow to fill a two week money gap till I'm back 
in 
                            Beautiful Camden Town
        I sound's like a proper nasty job but it is in Walkers crisp factory 
so maybee I'll 
   come out a bit bigger round the middle 
       (and with big ears and be good at football, right?)
..............................................................................

........
             BIG PAIN
   I'd forgotten, but a few weeks ago I agreed to *spar* with our local 
policeman/Bruce Lee. 
      Just for a laugh like.
    
       Well, he found me this evening......

           What the fuck have I got my self into? 
       as a blur of fists and shins chase me round the patio. 
 Then local constabulary's meanest combine harvester suddenly asks "Having 
fun?" 
     I look back at the kitchen window to see horrified looks on the three 
little                                                        
      kids faces watching daddy beat fuck out of the lad from the over the 
road.
   
   This goes on for about 45 minutes and towards the end I'd  
 stopped thinking how much it hurt and just found myself laughing like a 
loony 
 at the craziness of trying to fend off this bloke when you 
                                         can't feel your arms or shins 
anymore. 
.................................,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,..............

.................,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,      
       Oh Ken
    I know the feeling
       Just the night before last,
                Helena Bonham Carter suddenly appeared at the  
                          foot of my bed dressed in rather less than nothing
    and whilst this isn't exactly a terrible thing to happen in one's room,
  her continual plea's for me to dress up in the spare gorilla suit she'd 
brought and
             that it was getting on a bit (quarter past three in morning!) 
    I did the only thing I could do, I took her home offering advise 
regarding a cold shower and half a bottle of something fiery.
        She rang me today 
                  "I'm sorry James, I don't know what came over me" she said 
embarrased 
      
    of course I said she could come round later to "talk" it over,  ha ha ha 
aha! 
   ...............................................................
    
      Anyway the real reason I have written to you all out there is a cry for 
your help.
       See, as you probably know the worlds most fantastic brill picnic mummy
        Cay (I have not in any way been bribed) has threatened to run off 
with all my 
    CD's currently stored on a shelf in her wood paneled Drawing room.
      Unless she see's at least 100 sinister people 
       assembled upon Primrose Hill on the 18th of November 2001.
          Please don't let us down and
                                     you know your duty.
           
           Disclaimer.
  Some parts of the Miss Bonham Carter story are more true than others.
  Largely the parts regarding me being called James and claiming to sleep in 
a bed. 


   You obviously have read this FAR so you're all absolute STARS.          
James.




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