Sinister: i'd rather be fat than be confused

[Kirsten Kenyon]

  i haven't had much to write about lately.  i went out and bought a 
new composition book today and sat down with a pen, and nothing 
came.  it's a pity to have a brand-new notebook and nothing to 
write.  i'm afraid that speaks volumes about my very existence in 
this city...opportunity without motivation.  and rooms full of 
potentially-interesting people i'm too shy to meet, their numbers 
nearly matched by the dozens of interesting people i've met who, for 
one reason another, i never call.  one thing that's interesting about 
this place is that nearly everyone makes eye-contact as they pass, 
only for a moment, making me wonder what they're thinking and what 
they've been doing to keep themselves entertained all day.  probably 
just drugs.
  drugs, studies, and music seem to be the dominant uniting factors 
among people my age.  i don't do drugs, and my half-hearted attempts 
at independent study hardly make for quality conversation in that 
realm.  and music...being far too poor to go about spending money on 
records has done its part to drain my confidence in discussing 
anything released after 1998.  maybe these are the reasons why i 
always find myself engaged in lengthy conversations with middle-aged 
men.  another possibility, of course, is that single 50-year-old men 
are hopelessly drawn to lone girls who, while comfortably past the 
minimum age requirement for "consenting adults," still look young 
enough to get carded every time they buy cigarettes.
  i've decided that another factor contributing to my lack of 
youthful companionship is that most people my age have made the 
necessary connections to obtain fake IDs, enabling them to stuff 
themselves into noisy, crowded "college bars" and, given the 
confidence provided by massive consumption of cheap beer, meet 
attractive strangers to politely push out the door in the morning.  
maybe that's not exactly "companionship," but it does seem to be a 
more popular past-time among 20-year-old people than sitting on a 
plastic chair, drinking tea and dodging a 54-year-old man 
persistently attempting to sell them bootlegged recordings of brahms' 
liebeslieder waltzes..."cheap."
  in any case, last night was the first time in ages i'd sat down 
with someone whose hair was bubble-gum pink by choice, as opposed to 
faintly purplish in the sun as a side effect of silver chic hairdye 
in a shade called "frosted twilight."  it was strange...i sort of 
felt like her grandmother, assuming her grandmother smoke parliament 
lights and giggles at dirty jokes.  
  i guess that's all.
  xoxo
kirsten (who, regrettably, looks like neither jennifer lopez nor 
kirsten dunst)


Care2 make the world greener!
http://www.care2.com - Get your Free e-mail account that helps save Wildlife!
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+
        +---+  Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list  +---+
     To send to the list mail sinister at missprint.org. To unsubscribe
     send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to
     majordomo at missprint.org.  WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister
 +-+       "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper           +-+
 +-+  "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+
 +-+    "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000     +-+
 +-+  "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000  +-+
 +-+  "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001   +-+
 +-+               Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa                 +-+
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+