Sinister: people try to make me do things

[juju fox]

halo again sinister.


::phew::

yesterday was my niece madissen's 13th birthday. i
took her shopping for some ballet things she really
wanted. then we ate lunch together. somehow, my veggie
burrito was wrapped in a chicken burrito paper, and
her chicken burrito was wrapped in a veggie paper. it
made me feel all dirty once i discovered bits of
chicken in my rice. i took it up to the counter to
explain how they'd mistakenly given me the wrong sort,
but then i checked madi's burrito, and discovered the
mistake. it still made me feel dirty. and i was afraid
to tell anyone about it. so there. i've confessed. i
may have eaten some part of a chicken yesterday, but
it wasn't my fault.


::i shot rockets::

after dropping her home, i drove to work. saturdays
are always puzzling when it comes to behavioral
patterns of traffic. i never know if i should leave
earlier or later than on other days. if people are
vacationing, i guess the freeways are more crowded.
but if people are shopping, the surface streets are
crowded. i wasn't aware of anything particularly
special happening this week-end, besides my niece's
birthday, but i left a bit early anyway. i think just
to get out of that house (so many kids). after
stopping for gas and a car wash, i still got there too
early. so i sat in my car feeling warm under the
windshield glass and trimmed my nails. they shot off
my finers like sparks. it was rather neat to watch,
but now i have to vacuum.


::lil bunny juju::

it has been cold and grey the past few days. april,
she thinks she's march. but may will be here next
week, and i want to run thru the redwoods before the
weather turns hot. my skin hates the sun. i have to
hide indoors, or under rocks. last night i was
standing at the end of the bar where i play piano,
resting my sore wrists, watching still clouds hovering
outside. i told myself i wanted to feel like a
mushroom. i wanted to feel tiny against tangible
giants. so tomorrow, once i get some rest, i will
drive to find trees. i will most likely end up driving
to the very town where *he* works. where he used to
live. where i fell for him. but i won't go there to
see him. i'll go there to borrow a friend's cello that
just happens to live where he stays during his weekday
commute from up north. ...now you can see how i get my
heart into trouble. so grate with the justifications.


::please erase the ? from over my head::

today i had breakfast with an old friend. he's
actually my housemate, as well as my bandmate... but
we haven't really been friends in a long time... not
since he met his crazy jealous girlfriend. but they
finally broke up last night (for the tenth time), so
now i get to ride shotgun again. he's the nicest guy,
and so talented and genuine, and he keeps going out
with the worst girls. you know, the kind that give the
rest of us nicer ones a bad name. i don't understand
it. ?


::too much time on my hands::

i think i'll attempt one more time to see e.t. i tried
to see it with *him* last month, but i'd be too
embarrassed to explain why that didn't happen. but i
saw that movie 20 years ago, loved it, came home and
played the theme song by ear on our old upright piano,
and from there taught myself how to read music, and
now look at me. juju's got a musical career all cos of
neil diamond. i just want to see it one more time,
come home to play the piano, and get on with my life
until the next 20 years comes round. (let's hope i
find something to do with myself by then.)


heartlight = on

juju



__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Health - your guide to health and wellness
http://health.yahoo.com
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+
        +---+  Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list  +---+
     To send to the list mail sinister at missprint.org. To unsubscribe
     send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to
     majordomo at missprint.org.  WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister
 +-+       "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper           +-+
 +-+  "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+
 +-+    "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000     +-+
 +-+  "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000  +-+
 +-+  "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001   +-+
 +-+               Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa                 +-+
 +-+               Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut!                +-+
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------+