Sinister: some old story about a boy who's just like me

[Rachel fruitloop]

Hello Sinister!
I saw the strangest thing on Monday night.  Two dorks sitting outside
of terminal 4 at the Los Angeles International Airport snogging for
at least an hour. And if you saw them, too, it was simply a
coincidence that one of them had a sort of red bowl haircut...
*ahem*.
I, of course, would never have been caught dead participating in such
a public display of affection, but you know, these kids today... such
thrill seekers! 
 
Don't listen to Ben, I AM a real person, I promise!  You know what's
funny?  I typed that and then had to question whether or not my life
is just a movie and I in fact am just a fabrication of some
screenwriter's warped mind... 

am I playing in your movie? you're in my magazine...

I didn't cry until I got into the car. And Tuesday night when I
turned out the lights and hugged my pillow and it smelled like him,
that made me cry again, too. I never thought that this would be the
way it would end up. I hoped that I wouldn't just fancy him because I
should, because it's a romantic thing when your list crush travels
thousands of miles to spend a holiday with you. The weird thing was
the lack of pretense. He just fit in so perfectly that there was no
awkwardness beyond the initial afternoon that we met. Like Ben said,
it feels unreal. Amazing.  He's just so... dreamy. 

I have said before that I am pro list crushes, but now I am REALLY a
supporter of that little function in our Sinister community!  I just
hope that any of you who have recently met/will soon meet your list
crush get on as well as Ben and I did.  I feel so fortunate!

I suppose a lot happened in those 8 days... I think the most
memorable time was on New Year's Eve.  We had a party at my house and
a bunch of people were on E (not us, though, we were just drunk!) and
everyone had such a good time and hugged at midnight and that's when
Ben first kissed me and I have never been kissed at midnight on New
Year's Day.

Some other memorable activities include seeing 'The Lord Of The
Rings' and 'The Royal Tenenbaums', watching Family Feud re-runs,
visiting my office, going out one stormy night to The Derby to watch
some swing band and drink with friends, Disneyland, the mall, going
to Santa Barbara and walking along State Street and then going to the
wharf at dusk and seeing some boats come in, and talking to a quirky
homeless guy who apparently has "been there, done that". Going to a
British pub in Santa Monica was an experience in itself!  We tried to
catch some highlights of his beloved Manchester United and I can now
say I've had a pint for breakfast.  And yes, I beat Ben in a game of
darts, but he let me win.  Then we walked to the pier and rode the
ferris wheel and had lunch in a little cafe. I drove him around the
mountains surrounding my hometown and we listened to tapes and sang
along together. We went to my parents' house, and mom and dad liked
him. One day we went bowling and Ben won, and then we were going to
have a DDR competition but I wouldn't play because there was a scary
looking guy who slammed his quarter down on the console and stalked
around us waiting to take the next turn.  Ben was not visibly
intimidated, but I was nervous!  One night Ben cooked dinner and I
helped cut up vegetables while he washed dishes.  And another night I
made him pizza and we drank nearly an entire bottle of wine and
watched 'What About Bob?' which is one of my favorite movies. 
Another night we watched 'Rebel Without A Cause' and drank cider in
my bed, but we both fell asleep before the end. Most mornings I made
tea and toast for him and he said that I make good tea and it made me
happy.  Sometimes I was still asleep and he'd make his own tea and
write e-mails and he even wrote me cute little messages while I
wasn't in the room, and I wrote back when he wasn't looking. He was
my dj, selecting cds to listen to, and he brought me Camera Obscura
and Tompaulin and even let me borrow his Moldy Peaches cd.  He played
guitar and sang to me while I napped and it was lovely.  That's where
I wish I was right now... right in that moment, in that place with
him.  It was just... perfect.

Since Tuesday, when I returned to work, I have been trying to get
back into the normal routine.  But it's impossible. I am driving my
housemates crazy because all I can think about or talk about is Ben!
I don't think life will ever be the same again.  So why fight it?! :)

I feel like Kirsten said. It's been hard to decide what to say about
such an experience, so I hope it's been slightly entertaining for you
to read.  I will have to post something less sugar-coated in the near
future (if that's at all possible!) 

And Ben, I can't stop thinking about how retarded you are!  March
will not arrive soon enough!

I hope that you all had a grate New Year's celebration and that
you're all well. For those of you who mentioned me and Ben in the
last two weeks of posts - thanks!  It was very exciting and special
to have you as a part of our adventure! 
Love to you all!

love,
Rachel fruitloop




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