Sinister: Ken that mean that I'm getting boring? Chu tell me...

[Rachel fruitloop]

HELLOOOOOO SINISTER!!!!!
Since so many of you kind lovely people out there have said some nice
things to me personally, or posted nice things, I thought it was high
time that I write one of my MEGA-POSTS! The first for 2002! Yay!


*****CEREAL KILLERS*****
Assman Walton wrote: "Ms Fruitloop's been quite quiet of late - I
suppose she's got the boy Apps to deal with, but still, one of her
huge recollective-post efforts wouldn't go amiss at chilly times as
these."  this post is especially for you, Stud Muffin.  

And also for Chris Pez who wrote: "whoever said that rachel frootloop
hadn't posted a huge summary post for ages was right, she must have
accumulated enough now. rachel, post again, i need to increase my
'i've been mentioned in a frootloop post' score.  its at 
4 at the moment and i'm sure others have more.  ben apps must be in 
double figures by now."
CHRIS PEZ, You are grate!!! hmmm... I dunno that I have mentioned
Benny all too much before my last couple of posts. It's hard to
remember!  All I know is that I *talk* about him ALL THE TIME! But in
any case, there's 2 mentions for you right there, just from quoting
other people's posts!  And there are more mentions of sweet Apps to
come!

Rachel Grapenut wrote: "I am so very happy for Rachel Fruitloop and
Ben.  Isn't everyone, though?  Please feel free to be as candy-coated
as you want to, rachel, it cheers me up."
Thank you Rachel!  Although I am not sure everyone is happy about
this.  Unfortunately, since my Reporting Back, Laura Llew has deemed
me a traitor for being lured to "the dark side" and has threatened to
kick my arse if ever I refer to Ben as "Sweetie" in public. 
Fortunately, Miss Llew can save her plane fare because that won't
EVER happen. (I call him "Bunny" not "Sweetie.")

Archel Toast, I hope your move went smoothly.  I also hope I provided
enough commentary on my version of the Sinister transatlantic
shenanigans!


*****WELCOME!!!*****
I would like to say welcome to Becky Wright.  And welcome back to
Bre.  And welcome to Toy Stephen, I am honored to be mentioned in
your first post, especially in the same sentence as the Dirty Vicar! 
And welcome to Andrew Barton--your story of discovering B&S was
lovely! AND welcome to Eliza Grae... I'll take cake over death any
day!


*****BIRTHDAYS!!!*****
Happy belated birthday to Matt Henderson!  Sorry about your Clash
record getting broken! Happy Belated Birthday also to our Bond Girl,
Ola.   Happy Belated Birthday to Belle the year old dog, and also a
Happy Belated Birthday to Kara Jean!


*****U-B ILLIN'*****
I hope that you are feeling better now, JenOwl.  Also Ken, Pamela and
Kirsten, I hope that you are well now, too.


*****GENDER*****
Astrid announced that she is in fact a girl.
Stine also announced that she is in fact of the female gender.


*****ASTRID*****
I like Astrid's posts because she would have been my best friend if I
were ten years younger and lived in her town.  You can tell she's
something special just in the way that she expresses herself. And I
remember the first time I realized that I had gained weight and I had
previously been "the girl who can eat anything" and I think I was
around 18 or so... Astrid makes me feel like I am really young again,
and in the best possible way. Astrid said that she is no longer
smitten with a 13 year old boy.  Also, she gets "super cool" points
for mentioning Pippi Longstocking whilst being Swedish.


*****STACEY DAHLING*****
Stacey Dahling wrote: "We actually thought we had lost Coral and the
sheep - how this is possible I do not know - when we saw a little
sheep head pop out from behind a kiosk and look in our 
direction. I almost peed my pants."
I went to the photo link to see this sheep myself and it looked like
a very good time!  I think that is something that my friends and I
would definitely do. And actually, it reminded me of a story in
Marilyn Manson's autobiography about he and his girlfriend going
around his hometown in Florida around Christmastime and replacing the
baby Jesuses in people's nativity scenes with hams.  and now I am
using the Jedi mind trick to make you all forget that I just
mentioned Marilyn Manson's autobiography! eeek!
Stacey Dahling also wrote about a club called Kitcherella: "Then the
lights dimmed and three screens came down from the ceiling and the
opening of Dynasty was projected. Lordy. Everyone hooted and screamed
in glee."
No fair!  I wanna go to this club!!  Why can't I hang out in Greece
with you guys!?

*****NEW YEARS*****
Needless to say, I was highly amused by Stacey Dahling's ghetto
holiday in Greece with miss Velocity Girl. I also liked the idea of
Stacey sitting in her black knickers and racy black bra with black
and white striped socks and Florence Henderson hair on New Year's
Eve.  I tried to picture what I was doing while she wrote that post.

Stacey Dahling also wrote: "I took note of everyone’s chosen way to
herald in the new year as if they were deciding how they wanted to
die. Wow, Coral wanted to go out in a strip club. Seemed apt. 
Me, I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t alone. Many others decided to
spend it in bed."
Me, I suppose I want to die with all of my closest friends.
Completely drunk and in the beautiful arms of Ben Apps. *sigh*

Will Salt wrote: "Tonight I am going to go out, and tomorrow I am
going to rest.  The day after, I want to go out and buy a notebook,
so I can start writing things down.  If I start writing things down,
I will get better at putting things into words.  If I start putting
things into words, I might be able to explain things a little better.
 If I can do that, I will be able to do anything.  Maybe even have
plaited hair in public a bit more often."
Yes, Will, you should have plaited hair in public more often!  And
writing is grate.  I don't write in my journal very often.  Just when
exciting things happen or if I'm in distress.  I was looking over
what I wrote last year and I can see how much my life has improved
and how many of my goals I've met and that makes me happy.  Maybe it
will make you happy, too.

Madeliene had the best year ever and has resolved to get pissed and
eat toast this year.

Becky Wright's new years resoulution is to learn more constellations
by sight: "I also look up at the night sky a lot nowadays but that's
just to find the seven sisters which is the only constellation I can
recognise."
Becky, I think that is the most romantic constellation ever. I like
the name "seven sisters" because it makes me think of being in London
and it makes me think of the song "By The Sea" by Suede.

Andy Williams wrote: "I got a dart board, and it is now my new years
resolution to score 180 in open play, hopefully against Matt Powell. 
My other resolutions are to have a song I write played on the radio, 
continue to stop smoking and write two books (one fiction, one
non-fiction)."
Wow, you are ambitious Andrew!  I wish you luck! (darts is a hard
game!)

Andrew also transcribed this from Stuart Murdoch: "I resolve to
become immortal. And then die."

Big Stu wrote: "I made two New Year's Resolutions. The first was to
do 50 sit-ups every day to get rid of the effects of the Christmas
alcohol, which has a tendency to turn your six-pack into a keg. This
resolution lasted, erm, about 0 minutes,since I haven't done a single
sit-up yet. The second resolution was to travel to Guatemala, Belize
and Honduras in May / June. Which should be a bit easier to stick
to."
I'd rather travel than excercise any day.  Unfortunately, I made the
resolution to lose weight, too.  How cliche, eh?

Rich.Gil. wrote: "I don't remember so much more. alasdair trying to
make me dance.  kirsten trying to make me dance.  ken trying to make
me dance.  me not dancing.  at twelve o'clock.  I KISSED THEM ALL.  I
don't think I missed anyone out.  if I did, I apologise.  or.  you
were too quick."
Awww, what a lovable huggable snuggable cuddleable glow worm you are,
Rich!  Now Ken can't complain about not getting kissed!

Cola Cube Cay wrote: "And there my dears lies the crux of my New 
Year's Resolution. To be a happier Miss Cola-Cube. I may fall down at
times, but I'll keep dancing."
That's a good resolution Cay! I think that we all should dance more
this year.  It will cure what ails anyone (except if your problem is
that you're missing legs; even then you can roll around on the dance
floor.  Either ON the floor itself or in a wheelchair on the dance
floor--your choice!)


*****IAN*****
Ian posted a story which in it's bizarre darkness, I found it to be
brilliant.  It reminded me of a dream I had on Tuesday night that the
sky was full of teeny-tiny 6 week old orange baby kittens in
parachutes.  Also my dream from Wednesday night that an A-Bomb was
dropped.  I'm not really questioning why I dreamed these things, but
why I *remembered* that I dreamed these things.

And then Ian wrote a grate story about Saint Peter and the heavenly
gates, prefaced by this: "zac foley, bass player with emf, died
yesterday.  the cause of his death has not been released, 
and it seems to have been more-or-less ignored by the News.  i'm
afraid this is another obituary.  the man deserves one for oh-so-many
reasons"
I hadn't heard of his death at all, just what Ian posted.  My friend
Vicky LOVED emf.  Oddly enough, so did my mother.  They are saddened
by his passing.
But the smarmy follow-up tale of Saint Peter coming round to look at
porn websites and running off to find the perfect Isobel Campbell was
really entertaining, and I could hardly wait for the next
installment!
And then Saint Peter himself posted to this blessed list and I
laughed so hard I nearly fell out of my chair!  And your suggestion
that Saint Peter disguise himself as a Hello Kitty pencil case
impressed me.  That is, I WOULD be impressed if he were trying to
"woo" me!  The lyrics to "the Armageddon" that Ian posted were most
clever.  It hit on a lot of my beliefs about the war.  Well done,
Ian!


*****DVD/VCD*****
So Neil Robertson revealed that there is a B&S VCD in the works and
added: "There are other TV things you haven't mentioned, but I'm not
going to mention them because if we don't use them I'll end up
getting chinned about it."
Oh no!  Now we're all going to wonder what *could have* been on it! 
Why why why must you torure us like this, Neil!!!

Lawrence Mikkelsen wrote: "A few days ago I got a copy of Suede's
"Lost in TV" DVD. It's great, for a number of reasons." 
Ohhhh, another mention of Suede in this post.  My old threads are
showing!  I am excited about this dvd because I used to live and
breathe and stalk Suede.  I am wondering if they used any live
footage from their tour of America in 1997 that I shot with Simon the
drummer's video camera. That would be pretty cool.  But I haven't
seen the dvd yet! :(  Is there much live footage, Lawrence?


*****SINISTER MINCE MEET*****
Melmoz should wrangle up whoever she can for a Sinister meetup in the
Dallas area... from what I remember in my Suede stalking days there
was quite an anglophile crowd out that way and I wonder if it's still
like that.  Crap!  I mentioned Suede again!  Sorry!

Archel Toast wrote: "yesterday i foisted the idea of a brighton
meet-up on the folks at #sinister, promising sex (well, SSX
snowboarding on the playstation 2),drugs (well, alcohol), and rock
and roll (well, DDR).  what i'll do now is keep mentioning it here
until you all think it's as inevitable as death and taxes and can't
remember a time when you weren't going to come to brighton on
<actually i haven't picked a date yet>."
I think you all should meet up whenever Archel says because she's
lovely and she will show you a good time!!!!  

Joe "Rachel Pancake" Vester wrote: "I also wondered if the sinister
world would like to take part in a sunflower growing competition."
I'm up for it, that sounds like a good idea. But of course my plants
usually die. But maybe this won't end in disaster! :)

Danny my little cutie pie Farrell wrote: "i met the adorable kirsten
marie kenyon who it seemed was just as much the fun queen in the
flesh as she is on our very own wee sinister,although this 
was only from five minutes as the poor wee soul was shattered from 
travelling et al. she gave me saltine crackers from someone,not 
someone random,someone in particular.my baker.bakers usually make
bread not crackers,this baker is special."
Awwwwwww!  I wanna meet Kirsten!  I am happy that she got to meet so
many of you kids in her travels.  And I am glad you got your special
crackers, cutie pie!

Madeleine wrote: "Laura, I hope you realise this means I am forced to

kidnap you, drive you to the Mexican border and marry you. Neither of
us have any choice in the matter, I'm afraid."
Where should we send the wedding pressies!?

*****MAKING IT*****
Rob Lorenson made Lame-o trade stickers and I think I may want to get
my hands on some!  He said: "Note:  Lame-o does not necessarily mean
crappy.  Well, maybe a little bit.  OK, most of the time, lame-o
means crappy.  But, maybe not in this case."

Archel Toast wrote: "i begin to think that if you're passionate about
music, the last thing you should do is write about it, because you
will inevitably disappear up your own arse before you can say 'i hate
starsailor, me'."
I think it might be that way in any creative field.  I'm finding that
if I get too comfortable in any job, that's sort of the way my
designing goes, too!  Lord knows I haven't painted anything decent in
a couple of years, but I can design a nifty magazine ad for shampoo! 
sheesh!


*****REALITY CHECK*****
Rachel Sunnyside-up wrote: "Accidentally sitting on the same ferry as
a band is good too.  Watching people, who write the songs that have
sort of become my own,  do normal things, made me happy.
At the same time it could have made me a little sad. Feeling guilty 
that was too much of an intrusion, knowing that songs don't really
belong to me. A reality check."
But don't forget Rachel, Stuart said "every song I ever wrote was
written for you..." and as long as they make their albums available
to us for purchasing, I firmly believe he's singing to every single
one of us! What a happy thought!

Amy "Rachel Applejacks" wrote about her brother Dan who is autistic:
"he's never had a friend.  never been kissed." and it sounds to me,
Amy, that he has a friend in you. That is something special.

Jules Markham wrote: "I know I should be helpful and honest, but I
feel like a freakshow. Just laid open and bare to be picked over by
people who mean well but curiosity makes them rude. Still, I
encourage the questions, more open-mindedness, and please 
dont burn me."
My mother went through that for a long time when she first began
telling her friends and family that she is Wiccan, but after a while
her closest circle accepted it as if she were always a witch and the
rest of the population usually don't need to know that she's a witch
and so she started feeling less like a freakshow and more at peace
with her own traditions and ceremonies. I hope that people don't give
you too much trouble about your beliefs.

Gordon wrote: "I find it magnificent to be upset and for life to take
one by surprise... "
That's inspiring. I never look at things that way. I like to feel
that everything is under control and even. But maybe life WOULD be
more magnificent with more upsets and surprises.  That idea scares
me, though.

Kieran Devaney wrote: "at which point does experience lose its lustre
twixt mind and paper, between keyboard and computer screen? will 
anything i tell you register in the way i want it? "
That's a good question.  I find it hard to write things down on paper
now.  Even when I want to write poetry, I find it easier to compose
on a computer screen and the only time I really write things on paper
is when I write retarded things to Ben.  And beyond that, so much
about conveying an idea is in the mind of the reader, not so much in
what you write.  It helps if you are a descriptive writer, but so
much of what you describe could be perceived in such a different
manner.  Besides that, it's hard to write about feelings and why an
incident strikes you the way that it does.  Who will ever get inside
every fold of your brain tissue? Will you ever really know all of the
inner workings of your own mind? 

*****LOVIN'*****
Danny Farrell wrote: "i have never known anyone to be quite like her 
and she is unique in ways that can bring me to tears.so i'm scared in
case there is a repeat performance of my whole life."
That's part of the risk you take in loving, I think.  I bet we are
all scared that we will be hurt in the same ways that we were once
hurt before. Sometimes you just have to throw caution to the wind and
go for it.

Kara Jean wrote: "I like the Rachel Fruitloop and Ben story because
it reminds me of Peter and I.  It will be our one year anniversary
very soon.  Throughout this year I have missed him alot, bawled like
a baby when we've had to part, sometimes bawled just because I miss
him so much, but I remind myself that he loves me and it's better. 
So Rachel, March, or whichever month you have to wait for, does come
even when it seems it won't."
I never would have thought in a million years that I would be
involved in something that could possibly rival the "Peter & Kara"
love story. Congratulations on your year anniversary!  That is very
sweet! I hope you're right about March coming even when it seems that
it won't. 

Elise J. Spry wrote: "So those of you who know me as somewhat of a
wanton vibrator-happy, party girl sex goddess will be either
pleased or disappointed to hear that I've officially Settled Down. 
The purple buzzy thing has been put away in my bottom drawer (NOT the
bottom of my drawers), and James G and I have set up house."
Whoo-hoo Lisey and Jimmy G!  I am SO HAPPY for you! (where's my
picture?  And thanks for the pressie--I LOVE IT!)

Ben Apps wrote: "I think she's waiting till I'm outta here to tell
you all what a dumb, lame slacker I am. "
You guys, now that he's really gone, I have to tell you what a dumb,
lame slacker Ben Apps is.  He is so dumb that he gets all of my jokes
and he's so lame that he wants me to be his girl and such a slacker
that he came all the way to California to be with me! Sooner or later
we will melt together and draw rings around the world...

Ken Chu wrote: "I got out a copy of Street Fighter II the other day
just to check again - and yes, Ken and Ryu still say "Adore Ken" when
they shoot out fireballs.. maybe I just love myself too much.
Can you blame me though?"
No, I can't blame you Ken. I think when Laura Llew comes over here to
kick my arse (which I'm sure she's about to do if she's read this
post!), we're going to be yelling "Adore Ken" as we shoot fireballs
at eachother! 

Pamela wrote: "Lovebites: good or bad? Discuss...."
hmmm. bad. they're ugly purple marks.  but good.  I *so* love to have
my neck nibbled!

*****INTERNATIONAL BOWLING*****
Carsmile Steve wrote: "KEN is the london bowling champion, despite
having been run a close second by BEN apps, who actually took the
first game by a whisker. "
yeah, the modest Ken, you sure took long enough to declare yourself
champion!  Thanks for clarifying that, Carsmile!

Robin Stout wrote: "The Kidderminster Sinister Bowling Extravaganza
was a cracking success. Actually, it was only me who went. And I
didn't go bowling; I went to a pub and ate a pie."
I think you should get a prize just for being so hilarious!

Jenn PB wrote: "encoded message:  SGSYOUARETHEBEST!
and also a pleasant hello to Ms. Edna Welthorpe.  I think I owe you a

drink."
I am happy to hear that you all had so much fun!  And whenever I read
about Mrs. Edna Welthorpe it makes me 'Prick Up My Ears'!


 *****A FFAIR*****
Robster wrote: "Anyway, if you live in America and you've been to/in
a
parade/county fair/monster truck rally - email me and
tell me about it so I can have some vicarious
experiences to match the images.  Mmmm..."
It's not so great to be in a parade actually.  I used to be in
marching band in high school (she banged the drums!) and it was
usually a living hell because of the outfits-- my high school mascot
was the Highlander and so the drumline wore kilts and I usually had
to march in the competition portion of the parade which entailed
changing my costume out on the street into the polyester trouser
outfit and big furry hat and it was always *hot* and awkward and I
HATED it and little kids would throw stuff at us and try to hit our
drums and during the competition portion, you couldn't break
formation so if a pile of horse shit was in your way, you had to just
step in it! Ecchhh!  Not to mention the blisters and heat stroke! 

*****SASSY LASSIES*****
Dirty Vicar wrote: "I've been listening to Kate Bush's first album
"The Kick Inside" a lot lately. It's a big bag of fun. We always do
expressive dances to the opening bars of the first track, which shows
how artistic we are. Does anyone know what other Kate Bush albums are
worth listening to?"
OOOH, I LOVE KATE BUSH! I can just imagine the dances you must do! 
"The Kick Inside" is my favorite, I used to think that she was my mom
on the cover of that album, because my mom looked very much like that
in 1977. I can play an acoustic version of "Moving", but not very
well.  Other grate Kate Bush albums are 'The Dreaming' and 'Hounds of
Love'...  Go get them NOW!!

Alyson wrote: "by the way, i've finished the quiz, and my music muse
is... fiona apple?"
Ok, I have to admit... I like her.  I have the album 'When The Pawn'
and I like listening to it during spring rainstorms. It just
*happened* I couldn't help it!

*****POETRY & PURRING*****
Pamela wrote of needing a name for her stray cat... I love the name
Agent Cooper for a cat because I also have a *wee* obsession with
Twin Peaks.  In fact, my brother Tony and his wife Tiffany have a cat
named Diane after Agent Cooper's "Secretary" tape recorder he's
always speaking memos into!  So your stray could have his counterpart
all the way here in Canoga Park, CA!  Awwww, how cute! I hope your
kitty is ok!

Johnny Shred then enlightened us with a T.S. Eliot poem about cat's
names which was grate!

Archel posted a very timely poem by Raymond Carver... about fear.


*****STUART'S CAR*****
Michelle Ruiz wrote: "I also think Struan has NASCAR aspirations with
his driving gloves. I'd like to see that racing car. It'd probably be
painted plaid with sponsorship from Fruit of the Loom t-shirts."
Yeah, but I'd love to see it with *Fruit of the Loop* sponsorship! ;)

Ken Chu wrote: "Stuart Murdoch's car: so is he a boy racer then? 
Does he have twin exhaust pipes (with a hole drilled in for extra
noise) and big fuckoff spoilers and air vents on the bonnet cover and
a "go-faster" strip and under chassis neon lighting and a big KENWOOD
sticker at the back window?  Does he pump out "I love my car" through
his KENWOOD speakers?  or does he have a special DRUM n BASS version
for his car?"
KEN!!!!! I was lauging already when I got to the part about "fuckoff
spoilers" and then you just had to go even further by making me
picture the window sticker and the drum n bass version of "I Love My
Car"! Damn! My stomach is going to burst!!!

*****!VIVA RACHELS!*****
The Mixtape battle continues!  The last I heard, the tape was in the
hands of Caleb Ben AKA RAW, and where has Mr. Caleb Ben been lately
anyway? I miss him! The tape is about to make it's way overseas next!

James the Dancin'Hatchback wrote: "If you've read this FAr you're
clearly a raving fruitcake."  I would like to say that if you've read
this FAR you're clearly a raving fruitloop!

and now for the moment you've all been waiting for:
*****FAVORITE QUOTES*****
"But these kids are not even back woods. They give being a
redneck a bad name."  -- Mr. Willitron300

"It is hard to write e-mails whilst a horse is giving you the "come
any closer and I'll jump over the fence and trample all over you
alright? Punk." look, especially without a computer."--Kenneth PY Chu

"I don't mind when friends smoke but when my car takes up the habit
it gets personal"--Laura Llew

"I don't have any fucking sins, I'm an angel"--Saint Peter of Heaven 

"well, only 363 more days to mess up..."--Archel Toast


Take care everybody, and love to you all!
love,
Rachel fruitloop


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