Sinister: 300 dollar dictionaries are big

[bus stoppers]

dear sinister,

how is everyone doing?  my new vice --the headache-- is still
being a bastard, but i hope that none of you have one right now
and that everything else is completely wonderful.

half of my summer classes are done.  well, one out of two.  so
only two more weeks of school.  for now.  sigh.

my grandma yelled at me the other afternoon because my stomach
was hurting.  i have been sleeping a lot more now that the
english class is over and having suuuper ouchie stomach
problems.  stress.  it's a bad thing.  so i get yelled at
because i'm stressed out.  at least it's not as mad as she would
be if i came home with bad grades...

anyway, at work, i found this big huge $300 dictionary.  i
mentioned to the other girl up there with me that it was
beautiful.  she fully laughed at me and called me weird.  for
someone who reads her sex books, it's fine by me.  i don't care
if i'm weird.  and besides, is it really that weird to think
that words are pretty?  

i didn't think so.

i'm sorry that this post is such crap, but i'm a bit hungover. 
as many times as i say that i will never drink again, put me in
a bar (in california) that still lets you smoke inside and that
has tons of the cure in the juke box...i'm a lush.

anyway, i think i do have a point to this post.  i need help
with a strange situation::

my friends sonia and steve are married.  sonia has a daughter
from when she was a teen and together they have 2 boys.  so
three kids all together, because her daughter thinks steve is
her real dad (which he kinda is in a way). 

alright, so sonia and steve live in the town where my parents
live and i haven't seen them in a while, having moved an hour
away with no car.  well, one night a few months ago, steve
called me drunk on my cell phone from his brothers house.  

uummm...

which is the best way to um...get your friend's husband off the
phone while he insists on saying inappropriate, but not dirty,
things, while he's drunk...?

well, i never told sonia.  
should i have?

this is already his second marriage and they are jehovah's
witnesses and so that also would complicate things.  he had
tried to call a few times after that and i jus didn't answer the
phone.  i think he might be an alcoholic actually.

then sonia called me a coupla weeks ago.  really pissed at me. 
snapping and talking rudely to me.  i felt bad, but in the
process of not knowing what to do about steve, i stopped calling
her because i freaked out.  i miss the childhood innocence of
not knowing a difference between knowing what's right and
actually doing what's right.  do things really have to be this
complicated?  

it's just been weighing on my mind for some time now and maybe
by some weird chance, one of you has been in a similar situation
and can give me some advice...

thanks for reading as my posts go deeper and deeper into the
pooper as i feel poopier and poopier...

love,
sara



=====
all the people'd stare as if we were both quite insane

someday my name and his are going to be the same

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