Sinister: is this the end, or just the beginning?

AMEBIX13 at xxx.com AMEBIX13 at xxx.com
Thu Jun 20 19:41:52 BST 2002


Hello there Sinister,

I hope this finds all of you well.  I've been thinking a lot lately...about my life, about how the time in my life where I currently find myself fits into the grand scheme of things, about the people who are now in my life...about how they are changing, how I am changing, and how I fear they won't be there anymore before I know it...maybe even before I have time to say goodbye.  These sorts of time's can be very confusing emotionally, as on one hand they can be quite a downer for the obvious reasons.  Change can be quite scary, at least for me...although at the same time, I can't help remaining a bit hopeful...that I will find happiness in the changes that are occuring around me, that an adventure waits right around the corner, that things are going to get better.  Only time shall tell my lovelies, and I will keep you informed.  Am I alone in thinking that Idleberry's posts are the best!?  Surely I cannot be, I'm just always excited whenever I see one in my inbox, as I know it!
's going to be well worth the read.  The post she made about dreams was especially important to me.  It got me thinking a lot actually, about dreams in my life, about what they are exactly...and then I looked back at my boyhood, and looked at those dreams...The big one of my childhood, to go to college has been fufilled...at least partially, I'm not done afterall.  But when I looked at my life now I didn't really see myself going towards any of my dreams.  I've been making excuses for myself over the past few years, and well I think it's time for that to stop.  I am smart enough to do what I really want, I'm still young so there is still time, I'm not going to be stuck in Baltimore forever, and I won't settle for less.  I think that perhaps this is the first step to actually making these things happen, as if even I don't believe they can happen, the whole situation will just become a self fufilling prophecy, and that is the last thing I would want.  So that's where I stand...I!
'm going to go after these things...and feeling like I just may be going somewhere brings a smile to my face.  Dreaming keeps you young...and too often we get too old too fast.  I could say so much more on this matter, but I'm at work, and there are sound systems to be designed...with all this talk of the world cup I thought that someone may care that the company where I work designed and built the sound system in for the World Cup stadium in Korea...I'm probably wrong, but I already said it.  Well, my thoughts are starting to come apart at the moment, so I will wrap this up before I start babbling.
Keep Believing cuz you know things are going to get better,
Sean 

P.S. - B&S content...well sort of...I should be receiving a copy of Storytelling quite soon, so I can finally formulate my opinion on the matter.
xox
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