Sinister: a blustry day

[s. lord]

- it has been a while since i have been able to post - not that i really do 
much posting anyway - but i finally have some time so i decided this is as 
good a time as any - i have been quite busy as of late fighting with my as 
of late boyfriend - it has been a rather interesting week - i am now surely 
rethinking that decision i made to move in with him - it has been fun for 
the most part - but as of late - well it is just getting unplesant - but at 
least there is someone else living with us to break the tension - and he is 
more my friend then the xboyfriend - so i believe i have the upper hand 
there - if there really is anything to gain -
  - honestly -
- i really am not sure yet to why we were fighting so much - it seems there 
is a bit of miscommunication somewhere cause he is always accusing me of 
something i did not do and me likewise - from now on i have decided that 
when i speak with him i will draw out a flow chat of what i am meaning to 
say that way there is to be no confusion for him to later yell at me for - 
but then again perhaps what i say is really mean and he is reacting in a way 
that is justified - i do not believe that though - a friend brought to my 
attention that what i think is not always right - to which i responded that 
i am always right - and i usually am - well mostly - but that is not the 
case - what is - is that i am at a loss for what is happening - case in 
point - the most recent dialogue went like this...

- - - - - start dialogue - - - - -

me - how long have you been at the bar, you seem dirty
him - why, are you calling me a whore

- - - - - end dialogue - - - - -

was that necessary - seriously - i really was not implying that he was a 
whore because he was at the bar for a long time - i was merely implying that 
upon returning he was carrying a heavy stench of bad cigarettes and worse 
smelling booze - to which he responded in a quite irrational way - i believe 
i am right about this - i guess it could have been the way i said dirty - 
but i doubt that - there was no secret connotation to the word that i was 
trying to get across - unless he had been doing something - in which case i 
switch my self around and go with the calling him a whore thing
- - - - - - mmm - - - -  so confusing - - - - - -
- - - - this whole things is really a bother - i am beginning to believe 
dating is so overrated - sure there are somethings that i can't do by myself 
- and then i have my friends - not implying i will date them of course - 
just saying that who needs boyfriends and girlfriends - i just want my 
friends - that is all i need - they are the most accessible - and they are 
more fun - plus you don't have to go through the torture of dating people 
with friends - shit - friends are better any day -
- quickly -
- before i leave and let you all discus what a nut i am - i need to quickly 
give a nice little thank you to the best girl laura - you were perfect - you 
knew what to say and said it - quick and to the point - you are amazing - so 
love to you dear - and thank you for listening to me - i should have 
listened to you sooner - -

-- love to everyone --

      -- scott --









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