Sinister: ~ is the word

[ian]

~ is the word
its the ~
that you heard
its got ~
its got meaning
~ is the time
is the ~
is the motion
~ is the way
we are feeling


hello my fluffy bunnies of rage. i hope you are well.  in fact, i hope you
are better than well.  i hope you are ~

you look confused, i'll explain.

this morning, i got a letter from texas.  my hands trembled slightly as i
opened it, because i knew who it would be from.  i've been in sporadic
contact with the polyphonic spree* for some time now, i've written them
stories, sent them my songs and my musings on life, shared jokes with them
and they have, on occasion, written back.
the last letter wasn't very positive, but i KNEW this was the one...the
one..
they want me in their band, they do..

'Dear Ian,

Whilst it may appear that we are peace-loving, white-robed hippy cultist
gorgeous lovely happy people, you should bear in mind that we are also
Texans.  We know people with VERY BIG GUNS.  If you don't leave us alone,
they'll SHOOT YOU

Best Wishes
The Polyphonic Spree

p.s. you're nearly 30 now, its time you learnt to use capital letters'

oh.
i wasn't expecting that.
i put the letter down, made myself the usual morning brew (white spirit with
just a spot of milk - no sugar, i'm careful about what i put in my body) and
pondered who i knew with BIG GUNS who i could send out to avenge myself.

how could they?

how COULD they say such a thing??

nearly 30?

i'm.... as old as my tongue and slightly older than my teeth.  and that's as
old as i'll stay.

and...capital LETTERS??!?!?!?!?!!

my list of friends with nasty weapons:-

1. archel playforth - problems: not so much a 'friend'.. more of a sworn
adversary.  but i HAVE heard her talking about her 'buzzing bazooka'.  that
said, she's probably at some all-week s&m party right now, and she might not
help me anyway

2. saddam hussein - problems: kind of busy at the moment.  and i don't
ACTUALLY know him.  but if i tell him i voted for him he'll probably believe
me.  lots of people did, i hear..

3. the little boy across the road that throws fireworks - problems: he might
throw one at me.

saddam hussein it was, then.  but he's very difficult to get hold of right
now.  i tried to talk to his chums, but they kept saying things about
infidelity and hanging up on me.

i sat there, staring out of the window.  (it wasn't raining, marianna, but
there was a bit of dew on the ground) and i realised there was nobody i
could turn to.

it is said that all the great mystics have to endure a dark night of the
soul.  st john of the cross; teresa of avilla (or somewhere similar); julian
of norwich; sylvia of peterborough... all of them suffered great agonies
before The Truth was revealed.

bloody ancients.  always so melodramatic.
i made do with a grumpyface over a cup of tea and i thought of my PLAN.

sinisterines... we shall form my...er that is ..our own CULT.

i have seen the light

and the light is ~

consider the ~

i bet you never have.  look closely at what is before you.  no, put that
away and look at the keyboard..
what was it shakespeare said? :' there are many things in earth and heaven,
horatio, which aren't quite what we think they might be.  some of them are ~
'
sheer poetry..**
the ~ .  it sits, quietly, in the back of our minds.  we all
know the ~ exists, but how many of us have ever taken the time to consider
it?  i mean, really, really consider it, and its inherent possibilities?


does this time of year, or any time of year, make you feel strange? (i KNOW
it does..)
do you sometimes feel a sense of dissatisfaction, without really knowing
why? (i KNOW you do)
do your sex toys always break before you've had them very long? (mr
casarotto, this one's mostly for you..)

it is because your ~ is imbalanced.

you're smiling.  you don't think you have any ~ .  but have you ever looked
within?
still your mind for a second.  no words, no thoughts.  you can stop them
coming in if you try hard enough.  hold just one thing in your mind.
the ~.
  feel the ~ flow through you, imparting its ~ishness all around your body
as it goes.  feel the ~ from your head to your toes.  feel the ~ flow out of
your nose.
and back in again, of course.

how did it feel?  are you at one with the ~?  do you feel a sense of peace?

practice this once a day, my friends, and you will know The Truth.  you will
never need
music, or drugs, or sex, again.  although when we're a proper CULT we may as
well indulge in them, because they'll probably make our experience of the ~
even more profound.

and we will write our own music.  and we will be great.  and the message of
~ will flow around the world.

for the moment, though, you can just send money.  to:

the ~foundation,
selly oak,
birmingham.

it'll get here.  i've bribed the postman.

love and ~~~~~~~~~~~~

ian


* if you don't know who the polyphonic spree are, go here:
http://www.thepolyphonicspree.com/main.html

** the passage about ~~ in shakespeare's much overlooked work 'that hamlet,
and how he couldn't make up his mind' was removed by many early editors who,
under the fist of whatever religion prevailed at the time, were prevented
from revealing the inner secrets of this great man's work.  this absence is
now beginning to be recognised, and modern audiences will soon be able to
gain a whole new insight into areas of old will's plays that were denied
their predecessors.
 maybe




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