Sinister: Laura Llew's Lengthy Lamentations: Post The First

[Laura Llew]

Markelby Minxed:
"As for the hot pants, it's just scurrilous gossip on a slow-news day. 
They're perfectly innocent shorts, bought for $2 at a goodwill store in 
Denver, and they don't reveal anything they shouldn't. I'm not that kind of 
boy!"

And on that sorrowful note, I shall now begin my Sinister Post of 
Lamentations.

Lament 1:1
Bright Eyes opening for Belle & Sebastian? I met a sinisterine at a Bright 
Eyes show a few years ago. Afterwards, he made a pass at me in a cemetery. 
I'd be interested to see what would happen with a whole swarm of 
sinisterines after Bright Eyes played. Not interested enough to actually pay 
to see Bright Eyes play, mind you. However, those going to the Cali shows & 
picnics - considered yourself warned.

Lament 1:2
I had heard from Sinister NY picnic mommy Eric that there wasn't a diluge of 
response to the announced Prospect Park picnic and was I  going to shame you 
all into coming. I mean the Gayest of Jays will be there! Do you really want 
to miss your chance to meet a real life North Carolinian?! (Be warned, they 
bite.) However, since Aruni's picnic announcement just came in I'm 
thoroughly confused on what is happening.

Will the two proposed picnics merge into one HUGE prospectful picniciking 
force or will there be a battle of the picnics - complete with food flinging 
and ant cheerleaders? If there's a fight, then I'm siding with Eric and 
Jay's picnic. They might be gay and might not know how to fight but at least 
all battle plans will be executed with style. Actually, I take that back. I 
hear GayJay wields a pretty mean foil. Personally, I just want an 
opportunity to yell, "Parry his flank!" in public. Heaven knows that my life 
already suffers seriously from absence of blade as it is.

I just realized how smutty one can get with fencing terms so I looked up in 
a fencing glossary on-line all the terms which begine with L. Here's a 
choice few: La Belle, Low Line, Low Invitation, and Lunge. Fencing terms sum 
me up completely! Who would have thought it?!

Lament 1:3
The other thing I'm looking forward to during the Llew Takes Manhattan 2003 
spree next week is the fact that the DOROTHY PARKER festival will be taking 
place that weekend. Wheeeee! I think if anyone else is planning to be around 
that you should come if interested. (You can sign up at: 
http://www.dorothyparkernyc.com/). I know I will be there - eating lunch at 
the round table at the Algonquin, doing a walking tour of all of Parker's 
old haunts through Manhattan (naturally, there's a bar stop after each 
actual home or old employment site), watching excerpts from the play "Here 
Lies Dorothy Parker, etc. The only sad part is that I shan't be staying at 
least one night at the Algonquin (which is on my To Do Before I Die list) 
because it's too expensive even with the fact that they're giving a discount 
to those attending the festival.

Friend: What do you have to do to get the Dorothy Parker discount? Commit 
suicide?
Me: I believe you have to sleep with all the males on the staff. Good thing 
she wasn't bi-sexual or you'd really be tired by the time you went to bed 
that night.

I tried to get someone to split the costs of the room with me but I think my 
warning that I'd probably end up hitting on them scared them away. Tsk, tsk.

Her name was Llew but they all called her Llewse,
Ll

PS - Is there anyone in the New York area who would let a nice soft sinister 
crash on their couch/floor/dry porch for any night on the beginning of next 
week (Monday - Thursday)? Obviously since I used the word "nice" I'm not 
referring to but I can vouch for them and am scrambling to find inexpensive 
places for people I know who will be up there.

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