Sinister: I heard you let him touch too much, on the back seat of the bus..

[robin stout]

Two.

I'm trying to work out a way of taking a photograph of someone without them 
noticing. You see, the man who drives the number thirty bus looks just like 
Johnny Cash. It's uncanny. The first time I saw him, I'd been reading Harry 
Potter in the bus shelter and had it in my hand when I climbed on the bus. 
He eyed me up as I climbed in. His grizzled chin hardened.

"Harry Potter?", he asked.

"Erm, yes", I replied, slightly embarrassed.

"Get off the bus."

"But I've got a ticket."

A shadow ran across his tanned face, like a high cloud over the Texan plain. 
The hollows in his cheeks deepened. He felt around for his gun, but found 
only a gearstick and a ticket machine.

"Well..", he said.

He let me on. I sat at the back and kept my book closed the whole way home.

I know you have stalked people before. I saw you behind that bush that one 
time; you were only pretending to tie your shoelace, don't pretend. So 
perhaps you could give me a tip or two. Of course I could always just ask 
him for a photograph, but he's still got that gun-barrel glint in his eye, 
and I don't think I'd like to risk it.


The number thirty is a good place for lookalikes. There's a woman who 
catches it every morning who looks so much like Jarvis Cocker that I 
convinced myself for a while that she was actually his sister. Turns out 
she's not, of course; I had a sneaky look at her bus pass and it said her 
name's Oborsky.

R x

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