Sinister: Annoying children with soccer cleats and SuperSoakers...

[Kim Girton]

Ah, it’s the Reporting Back that makes you quiver, is
it?   Apologies for the delay in reporting, those who
were eager to hear the synopsis of east coast leisure
activities, but the lab lost my soil samples and I had
to return to our digging site to collect replacements
to be analyzed, and I couldn’t do a Report Back
without soil results, now could I?  That would be a
disgrace. 

Mere words cannot quite describe the wonder of that
which was this first picnic.  No, nothing short of
interpretive dancing would be accurate.  But since all
I have are words: There was enough food to feed a
small army, though with Washington’s reputation for
being gluttonous and evile, what else would one
expect?  Lisa’s cookies were phenomenal and I kicked
myself for days for not remembering to take some home
with me… If you ever undertake baking again, Lisa,
I’ll pay you for two dozen!!! :) 

The bees must be lurking on the list, too, as they
were nearly more friendly than the Picnickers (this
may of course be attributed to the fact that
Picknickers are less likely to attempt to do a few
laps in your spiked orange and/or cranberry juice). 
Right, and there are no bees IN the ocean, in case you
were confused about where the Mid-Atlantic Coast is. 
Apologies for a non-specific recount of all who
attended, as we ended up, surprisingly, outnumbering
the birthday party of a reported 75 attendees who had
ACTUALLY reserved the picnic spot that we eventually
commandeered.  I’m pretty sure the birthday partiers
were lying about their guest list, though.  There was
no way there were 75 people there.

A lovely waterfall (kindly decorated by the locals
with empty Beast cans and Slurpee cups) served as a
delightful background on what was probably the first
obscenely pleasant day so far this fall.  It was
almost easy to forget one was in the politically,
socially, and economically tumultuous District of
Columbia, that is, barring the occasional outbreak of
sirens from just past the line of evergreens at the
edge of Rock Creek Park.   Did you know there really
is a Pierce Mill, after which the nearby road was
named?  I didn’t.  It’s a pretty sorry mill as far as
mills go, but not altogether aesthetically unpleasant
for a historic unused mill.  A non-Sinister picnicker
swore he saw a frog in the stream by the Mill, but
we’re pretty sure he was drunk, or just cruelly
taunting the nearby wee ones, who also swore the frog
existed and then ran away to pee in their trousers.  

A pretty low-key event, really – we chatted about the
band, of course, DICKYWUSS, of course, and those of us
who had not yet heard it quickly grew jealous of those
who had.  Lisa entertained us with stories about what
used to be Stuart’s car and the Dog on Wheels, and we
discussed the merits – or lack thereof – of
Constitution Hall as a venue for a band like Belle &
Sebastian.  The general consensus was that the Hall,
indeed, sucks, for pretty much any band, and
definitely for the likes of B&S.  Thank God they will
be appearing at the more commercial -- and thusly more
indie-kid spurned -- 9:30 Club next month.  So suck it
up, DC hipsters, and come out to join the B&S fun. 
It’s so rare we get to enjoy them live in these here
parts.

With the exception perhaps of the bruises I obtained
from being assaulted with tennis balls, we all left
unscathed, well-fed, and definitely well-sunned.  I
unfortunately could not locate Jenny at Wag night, but
perhaps next time, eh?  Special thanks to those who
brought food and drink, and whoever brought the tennis
ball… You'll get yours. :)  Kevin, sorry you had to
miss the event.  There’s something to be said for just
stuffing your personal life in a tote and bringing it
with you, instead of missing a rare event like this
one.  We could always have fed one more… :)

Don’t lose sleep if you also were a no-show.  Perhaps
someone else will take it upon him or herself to
organize Act II.  Thanks to all, and I’ll see you
‘round the List.

~ Kim

P.S. AND THE SOIL RESULTS WERE AS FOLLOWS:

* AREA: Near Pierce Mill; Pierce Mill Road,
Washington, D.C. NW
* Soil Nutrient Levels (based on ideal conditions for
agronomic crops):
-	pH ~ 6.2 (barely optimum)
-	Phosphorus ~ 38 ppm (optimum)
-	Potassium ~ 276 ppm (above optimum)
-	Magnesium ~ 49 ppm (below optimum)
-	Calcium ~ 2660 ppm
* Recommendations: Treatment with calcium carbonate to
raise the magnesium level and pH of the soil.  Needed
nutrients for a yield of 6 T/acre of alfalfa include
50 lb phosphate/acre.  For 100 Bu/acre, the soil will
require a treatment of 100 lb nitrogen/acre and 20 lb
phosphate/acre.  33 T/acre corn for silage will
require soil treatment of 240 lb nitrogen/acre and 80
lb phosphate/acre.
* Basically, we don’t recommend anyone begin farming
Rock Creek Park.  At least not near the bike path,
anyway.


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