Me: Here are the Thesauruses Clueless Customer #1: No, I'm looking for a book of synonyms. Me: So, it is a nonfiction book? Clueless Customer #2: No, it's a true story. Before you start to snicker at the lack of mute inglorious Miltons that abound in a little bookshop in western Carolina, may I remind you that Sinister is its own little source of disturbing quotage from people. Yes, yes. Why just a few months ago a sinisterette posted about how she loves to go grocery shopping because it's so "erotic." With the exception of a few family reunions and the four years which I lived in Utah, I haven't been around the mentally ill very much but I do believe this girl might benefit from extensive psychiatric treatment. (Then again, from my experience with Erotic Poetry I'm beginning to think that the most popular definition of "erotic" is simply "bad" to which I apologize profusely if this was her intention in the use of this word.) Second to only cruise ships, Grocery Stores would be the best (or is that worst?) setting for my own personal Hades. Because of this, I end up making comments like I did today while passing the produce department. "In Hell, everyone most likely has to eat watermelon naked" which only began a subsequent conversation about the book Cooking In The Nude and what dishes would not be included in such a book. (Trust me, the ones which would be included are worse - Chicken Porno Bleu, Promiscuous Prawns, Vealing Lusty, Fondue Me, etc.) See why I hate grocery shopping? ***Trivia Time!*** Does this have anything to do with Belle and Sebastian, you, or anything you care about? Not a chance! Does it have to do with MEMEMEMEMEMEME! Of course! Now for our sponsored random Laura Llew Trivia Tidbit: I have taken over 20 college credit hours in Religion which is enough for a minor at most universities. OK, so this actually doesn't even mean a thing and I didn't even go to church last Sunday. However, I did watch a good bit of the Simpsons' Marathon so CLOSE ENOUGH. I'm certifiably capable enough to be able to tell you that Matthew 'Fire and Brimstone' Henderson was correct in his summation of: "Jonathan in the Bible was David's best friend growing up. He was also King Saul's son, which made him kind of an enemy." See, aren't you glad we have a good ole' Southern boy on the list now to keep us on the straight and narrow(minded)? You can find all of this in first Samuel and I'm glad this is the original source of B&S new title rather than the other suggested Correlli's Mandolin. (Though personally I have delusions of mediocrity myself. I always set low standards for myself and consistently fail to achieve them.) I always appreciate biblical allusions (aka: delusions). Like when I was recommended the book "Eyeless in Gaza", I was ecstatic to connect that the title was referring to Samson. Personally, I can think of many things I would rather have than a Jonathan to my David - like an Ahab to my Jezebel, a Corianton to my Isabel, a Samson to my Delilah (snip, snip), or a Joseph to my Potiphar's Wife. Too bad I'll most likely just end up with a Dr. Jekyll to my Mr. Hyde. Speaking of Hot Hydes, no one told me WILL PORTER is going to be at the NYC picnic!!!! I'll be there with Belles on!!! Southern ones!! Honey dripping blondes on each arm and maybe one riding piggy back (which might be hard to manage in a hoop skirt but us Southerners are capable of ANYTHING!) Maybe I'll bring a Sebastian too for good measure! Ok, I'm lying like a politician (with my Intern on my desk). On Thursday, I'm leaving for Chicago for work instead of NYC for play :( What's worse is that I'm utterly depleted of mix tapes to listen to. Beware that I'm making a list of people under the "All Bark and That Bites" category who talked schmack about their mix tape abilities and then were UNABLE TO PERFORM. Though I can't complain about the entries so far. Perhaps you're just scared that Rachel Walther or Jer will beat you out. Wimps! Laura: I can’t think of any happy German literature A Clever Bookshop Boy: Yeah, even the fairy tales are Grimm I could be dreaming-- Laura PS- Stop being mean to BIG STU. I bet he has the best *seat* in the house PPS - Happy belated birthday to Chrstiaan!!!, Tamara, and Ralph Waldo Emerson. Plus, a happy premature birthday to Walt Whitman PPPS - Sorry, about the lack of "flow" (opposed to "Flo". Kiss my Grits!) in this post. Halfway through writing it I became depressed and started watching MTV (or maybe I started watching MTV and became depressed). Thus, if this ends up choppy and disjointed just be glad I'm writing and not reparing a broken bone. _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+