October 2002 - Sinister - missprint.org

Sinister: Your underarm smells and your KENCHU looks like hell.
by Rachel fruitloop 15 Oct '02

15 Oct '02

Hello Sinister! I decided to write because I read Sara's post and it made me happy. In my car, I finally switched from the new Flaming Lips album, to the Belle & Sebastian mix that Ben made. There is something so perfect about the subtle Southern California fall weather that compliments B&S so well. I only get to hear one song at a time now, since I get to work fatser than you can say "brush fire" but I make that one song really count. I turn up the volume real loud and sing along. This morning it was "There's Too Much Love". "AND WHEN I COME TO BLOWS, WHEN I AM NUMBERING MY FOES..." That reminds me of something. The first rule is that I'm not supposed to talk about it. But I can't resist. I've been initiated into a "fight club"... It started last night. I was hanging some curtains in my room. Then RHONDA came in and sat right down on the other panel I hadn't hung yet. I told her to "give me that, snatch ass!" and threw her onto my bed. As soon as my back was turned, there she was all over my curtains again, and this time she had snagged them as she tried to run away from me. She thought it was some sort of game I guess. Now I was really mad, hard time. I tried to grab her and she sunk her teeth into my arm. She left a puncture wound with a bruise. I whacked her on the bottom pretty hard and pushed her back onto the bed. She just kept coming at me with her blue eyes glowing and her sharp claws slashing me every time I got close enough to grab her by the scruff of the neck and throw her half persian/half siamese ass out. She is really into this Fight Club thing! This morning she passed me in the kitchen on the way to her food bowl and she gave me that knowing "you're in" nod. It feels so *great* to be socially accepted, even if it is by someone as anti-social as my sister's cat. I am so happy that Halloween is coming up so soon. I'm dressing up as a spooky witch in a sexy dress. And Ben returns to me in a week. He got his Visa and now all we have to do is get married in 90 days. It's going to be New Year's Eve, probably in Santa Barbara. One year after the first time we kissed. It's surreal that I'm going from being Ben's list crush to Mrs.Apps after only a year. But you gotta move quick to stay ahead of the government! I'm going to be so proud to be his wife. Those of you who know Ben will know what I mean. He's just so loveable, a great person to be around, and a wonderful boyfriend (even long-distance) and I'm sure he's going to be the husband of my dreams. I hope that every one of you single people out there find a match for you as fitting as the one I have found in Ben. As a side note to those who may be gagging, remember that begrudging other people their own happiness is a step in the right direction if you want to alienate yourself from others even further. I learned that lesson the hard way. It took me 28 years as well as consorting with foreigners to find true love. I think if there is someone out there so well suited for ME then there must be SOMEONE for EVERYONE. You'll see! I know that some of the Sinister massive will be in the area for our wedding day, which will be very nice. Maybe the person who ends up buying Stuart Murdoch's Grenada will be in the area, too, and they'll get it in time to be our chauffer on the way to what ever New Year's Honeymoon Blowout that ensues. Although, that person would have to be pretty drunk already to end up with it, so I'm not sure I'd want them taking me anywhere! They'll have to let me drive. I'll be driving along blaring "I Love My Car" and singing along as loud as I can, over the clanking of the tin cans tied to the bumper. love, Rachel fruitloop p.s. �VIVA RACHELS! Whomever has the Rachels mixtape should email me! __________________________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Faith Hill - Exclusive Performances, Videos & More http://faith.yahoo.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: A Modern Parable
by The Space Shed 15 Oct '02

15 Oct '02

Hello, and good evening, my little lambs of Jesyus. My name is sister Janice, and I have given my life to The Saviour. I would like to tell you a story. Once upon a time, there was a princess. She was the richest, most beautiful princess there has ever been. Her name was Angoustora. Angoustora lived at the top of the tallest tower in the world. A fantastic, magical tower, made entirely of mirrors. She could come and go as she pleased - none of that Rapunzel crap for this gal, er, that is, she was free to come and go as she pleased, with a thousand thousand servants waiting on her hand and foot. She wasn't locked up, like so many fairy tale princesses are. Oh, no sirree.. Despite all this, she was unhappy. Every day, she would wander to the mirror and proclaim, 'oh mirror, oh mirror, oh why am i so bitter?' This is not her story. Who wants to hear her story?? Try living in the Real World for five minutes, lady, that way you get to know proper misery and sadness and pretty quickly you'll find out where you can shove your hypherluted melancholic posturing... Err.. I am sorry, my dears. What I meant was that one can be unhappy in any situation, even the most JesusGodBlessed one. There are many that would suggest that, with faith, application and belief in the value of virtue, one can conversely be happy in any situation, even those where others would feel wretched. That's the sort of thing they taught me at the convent. Of course, we all know that's bullshit, don't we? Really. The problem with religious types is that, if you let them, they'll spout sanctimonious crap at any given opportunity. Don't doubt me. I know. I lived with a bunch of nuns for far too many years of my life. Always spouting on about 'the love of God' whilst excluding those who didn't fit into their narrow world-views. Always talking about accepting everyone whilst castigating their fellow NUNS just because they happened to have a penchant for playing loud disco music every now and again. I always say, if you're a NUN, and a NUN is your friend, and you can't accept another NUN, even though that NUN is your friend, and you're both NUNS then.. yeah.... well, I've given up that game now, so I don't need to remember it, do I? I have decided it is time to spread love throughout the galaxy, and accordingly I have constructed my own space-craft from a garden shed and plan to use it to travel through space, visiting those in need of a morale boost. ...And, when my own morale needs boosting, I just watch my little plants grow. I found them round the back of the shed, and I brought them in and tended them. The leaves are marvellous dried out and smoked. An old herbal remedy for Sadness of the Soul, so i'm told. For does the Bible not say that Jesus was a gardener? I think it does. The Bible was never my strong point. Probably why those nuns had it in for me from the start. Probably why they thought I MEANT to poison the mother superior. And the visiting cardinals. And the papal emissary. And the convent dog, little Julia Andrea. I wouldn't do that. Well, not to the dog, anyway. How was I to know it was bleach? It said 'lemon fresh' on the bottle, and it SMELT citruss-y. Hey, like I always said, if you don't like my cooking, don't eat it again. Except they won't be eating it again. Or anything for that matter. Nectar and ambrosia, maybe, now they've hauled their holy asses up where they always felt they belonged. Err...where was I? Oh yes, I will, for the next few weeks, be journeying about the galaxy spreading the Love of Jesus Christ Our Lord Saviour wherever I go. So, if you're feeling sinister, don't go off and see a minister. Well, do it if you must, but I've been there, done that. Got the clothes. Dull clothes. Still, they do get you a seat on the bus. Two to yourself, sometimes. Especially if you get out a string of beads and start muttering....it doesn't even have to be a rosary. Anyway, why try in vain to take away the pain of being a hopeless non-believer? Believe in the new Church! The Church of the Shed. Coming your way soon. Blessed be, my dears Sister Janice Slejj +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: hard and big time cores you snatch asses!!!
by bus stoppers 15 Oct '02

15 Oct '02

i feel as though i haven't written you my dearest in a bit and so i have to now. especially since i have been feeling as though i might be fianlly easing my baby toes into the foamy rushing and crashing edge of the sea. just smile all the time. (that's what wilco said.) so life is a big soap opera, right? some days we all feel okay. others super fine and dandy. while sometimes it's really sad and on the verge of tears. well, this past week, going on into this week, has been one of those peachy keen weeks. moodiness and melodrama has always been an easy consistancy for me. you know the type. constantly contradicting from day to day. that stupid bus stopper is such a damn oxymoron sometimes. or all the time? the air waves have been filled with the flaming lips still. i even just turned in a 10 page essay today on the yoshimi album. yes. i'm a fucking nerd. but it's okay. (that's what my parents tell me anyway.) and the new bright eyes. i saw them last week on a thursday and conner was simply angelic in his not so sick twisted beautiful way. there was even a cutie pie dyke behind me screaming for him to take his pants off. that would have been nice. now that the weather has officially (for now it seems) become FALL...i feel better. the fall and winter of any year are always nicer by default just because of the pretty gray skies and the crisp breezes that require cardigans. actually, all the cardi means is that i don't get funny looks anymore because i'm not wearing it in the summer anymore. i went to the store the other day and got a bunch of new socks. they are more of a trouser type sock, but not knee high in length. kinda cute, but tacky ugly at the same time featured in red, orange, green, blue, and purple! and i can't forget to mention the polka dots. it's like being able to wear a pair of highlighters on my feet, they are so obnoxious. i love my socks. oh i almost forgot! to top it all off i met a nice boy who is a cute sean lennon. he calls me just to say goodnight..... goodnight loves xoxox sara ===== all the people'd stare as if we were both quite insane someday my name and his are going to be the same __________________________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Faith Hill - Exclusive Performances, Videos & More http://faith.yahoo.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: GLASGOW EARTHQUAKE APPEAL
by Brian McNeill 15 Oct '02

15 Oct '02

> URGENT - GLASGOW EARTHQUAKE APPEAL AT 00.54 ON MONDAY 07TH OCTOBER 2002 A MAJOR EARTHQUAKE HIT MEASURING 4.8 ON THE RICHTER SCALE EPICENTERED ON GLASGOW. Victims can be seen wandering aimlessly muttering: "Ah wiz shittin' masel" and "Ah need some jellies". The Earthquake decimated the area, causing approximately £30 worth of damage. Untold disruption and distress was caused: Many were woken well before their giro arrived Several priceless collections of memento's from the Balearics and Spanish costas were damaged Three areas of historic and scientifically significant litter were disturbed The cone fell off the head of the statue outside the Modern Art Gallery Thousands are confused and bewildered, trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting has happened in Glasgow One resident, Mary-Alice McGregor, a 17 year old mother-of-three said "It was such a shock, little Chelsea came running into my bedroom crying. My yungest two, Tyler-Morgan and Shauni slept through it. I was still shaking when I was watching Trisha the next morning." Looting was reported to be unaffected and carried on as normal. The British Red Cross have so far managed to ship 4000 crates of buckfast and tennets Super to the area to help the stricken masses. Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings including benefit books and jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos. HOW YOU CAN HELP Clothing is most sought after. Items required include: - Sovvy rings; Baseball caps; Shell suits; Tesco two stripe trainers; White socks; Chunky gold chains Food parcels may be harder to put together but are necessary all the same. Required foodstuffs include: - Faggots; Buckfast; Grey Peas; Buckfast;Pork Scratchings; Buckfast; Tripe and Onions; Buckfast; "**** Blood Pud"; Buckfast; Fray Bentos Pies; Buckfast £2 buys chips, scraps and ginger for a family of four £10 can take a family to Coatbridge for the day, where children can sniff glue and spike up among the national collection of stinging nettles 22p buys a biro for filling in a spurious compensation claim Please send your credit card number. _________________________________________________________________ Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: we don't want to hurt you , we just want to be your friends
by Jonathan Skinner 15 Oct '02

15 Oct '02

Dear Belle Well i suppose this probably the hardest letter to write and i should be doing it face to face. I have fallen out of love with you but please don't blame yourself-it is me with the problem. 5 years is a long time to be blindly besotted with someone but i woke up a few days ago and realised i loved you just wasn't in love with you. it is time for us to move on with our lives but do you mind if i continue to see your friends? i actully like them now more than i like you yours etc hello all i hope this finds you all in fine fettle. I for one certainly am . Just an overwhelming feeling of good- maybe karma is coming back to me after biting me in the arse so many times. Life is sweet and i am happy- does it get any better. I don't think so. Jazz festival is upon us once again and i encourage all humans out there to come down to cork for the festival which is number 5 about good things abut Cork ( glance further down for the other 6 or seven) Reasons for living in Cork *the educated drunks- Driving by on a bank holiday past the hording around the courthouse where the drunks hang out they were putting math equations on the white boards. Went home and checked them and by god they were right. Now i never go past without my camera in the vague hope of catching them in the act *the mad old lady- who when ever there is anything big on in the street say a concert or festival of sorts yells at everyone "get the fuck out of my street" *tobacco Joe- an ould fella who walks in to every pub in town selling various brands of roll your own including i'm sure some less than legal roll your own *issac bells- only the best pub in the world selling hundreds of beers including a giraffe ( 5 pints of beer for ?15) Old man sitting on crates kind of place generally witha band on in the corner and numerous hipsters frequenting many of whom you get on nodding terms with *the jazz festival- legalised debauchary every october weekend where the entire young population of cork decides they actully do like jazz (What about us that really do) and manage to stay out on 3 all nighters which is aided by-- *the beer festival- run on the same weekend at all the brewry pubs with cheap beer and an abundence of it *the film festival- where all the young population decide they actully do like films ( what about us that really do) a week long classy festival with premieres and stuff that can be entertaining *the fringe- ok so it is nothing on edinburghs or dublins even but this year we have lego men doing MACBETH which should be quite interesting and a play called *pain* which is perfomed entirely on broken glass Wow when you break it down Cork really isn't that shitty a place to live Nothing much really happening around here at the moment just been getting more and more interested in a varied amount of music Rather enjoying the libertines at the moment and interpol and saloon and niceman and numerous others including many australian bands as well and other stuff that i am getting into- i belive i have got to open myself to more and more music and more and more obscure bands just for my own sake - i suppose when you have loved a band for so long they eventully disappoint you but that doesn't erase the good times i suppose. Any way i must dash love lollipops and plague and pestilence to all and sundry jonathan +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: I obviously don't love my car after all...
by Gardiner, Stuart 15 Oct '02

15 Oct '02

The last couple of days have been unreal. Walking round in a daze. Two years and two weeks ago, I was sitting having a beer in Paddy's Bar in Bali. It is no more. Two weeks ago, I was going out for a beer with a couple of people who were about to leave for a round the world trip, starting in Bali. Thankfully they're OK, but it was a close call. Of course, we all know who's to blame (even if certain 'leaders' won't accept their responsibility), but that's for another day. Before long, life for people in the rest of the world will be back to the same as before, just as it was after every other terrorist act in the past. But there are hundreds of people for whom life won't be the same as before. On a couple of other internet groups I'm in, there's been along debate about whether it's safe to leave home any more. To which the obvious answer (in my mind at least) is that around 200 people from Britain alone die on the roads abroad each year, mostly in France and Spain, but that doesn't stop people going. So backpackers will be back on Bali within a month, even if the luxury tourists stay away a bit longer (though they're not as important, since the money they spend goes to big companies who can afford the losses, whereas backpackers actually support the local economy). It doesn't take much thought to realise that the terrorists won't achieve their objectives by this. Which just makes it all the harder to comprehend. In even more earth-shattering news, Stuart Murdoch is selling his car. Apparently you get a free ticket thrown in for every single B&S gig for the next 5 years (so that'll be about 5 shows then). If we all club together, do you think we could buy it for the list? Then for every show, we can drive there in Max. And he'll have to give all 1500 of us free tickets... Is anyone going to be in London this weekend? The world's second best band (probably), The Whitlams, are playing their first ever UK gig at the Shepherd's Bush Empire on Saturday night. Now obviously all people with good taste in music will be going anyway, but just in case, since I'm coming all the way down for the evening, does anyone fancy a beer or two beforehand? Get in touch... Big Stu +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: the secret life of umbrellas
by ian 14 Oct '02

14 Oct '02

two mails in a day...again. you can blame robin stout. he said the following, and the appalling ignorance behind what he said was something that had to be addressed: >All the way home there was a trail of >dead umbrellas, abandoned in doorways, thrown into hedges, sprawled in the >middle of the road they weren't dead, my dear. they were resting. this is a subject human beings, as a whole, have given very little thought to. c.s.lewis gave away some of the less-subtle secrets of wardrobes; douglas adams has written whole chapters on the secret life of biros; but the (apparently) simple umbrella is ALWAYS overlooked. i shall enlighten you. this is how it works: you never get to see the sunshine. you are shut away from the warm days. they keep you in a Dark Place and, sooner or later, you get used to the dark. its not so bad, nestling away somewhere quiet, left alone, to one's thoughts. you come to enjoy solitude, reflection, perhaps even quiet meditation. one day, you're pulled screaming into the light. they don't give any thought to how YOU might feel about your sudden change of circumstance. one minute you're blinking, trying to let the light in in stutters, wondering what on earth could have caused this sinister development, the next you're thrust up into the air and underneath a cold shower. its a thankless task, protecting and sheltering human beings. you'd do better looking after your own desires, trying to find a way back to that closet, or a spot in the nearest sun-kissed branch of beatties. but, due to your altruistic nature, you do the best you can. you're that sort. you can spend all your life doing this. if you're lucky, when you're old, you'll be retired to the back of a wardrobe and forgotten about, replaced by a younger, brighter and more aesthetically pleasing model. some of the elderly even get a New Life in a charity shop window. for a limited period, obviously. many are not so lucky. they are abandoned. twisted, unhappy wrecks left to rot for the rest of their earthly incarnations of course, there are alternatives for those who are lucky enough to hear about them: the world we see is not the only one. there are many places where it brushes up against the others, places where the veils are thinnest and a cross-over is possible. there are even places where the veil disappears altogether. these we call portals. the portals to Umbrella Heaven are invisible to humans. however, our faithful friends can sense when they are near one, even if they aren't entirely sure what it is they are sensing. has your umbrella ever twitched suddenly, when you weren't expecting it? it wasn't a sudden gust of wind after all, you know. most of the portals are in places where human beings congregate. have you ever left your umbrella in a pub? actually, no, you haven't. it has left you. you didn't care for it. you didn't even care where it was when you weren't trying to get something out of it. and it left you. quite frankly, you deserved it. buses are another favourite. luminaries of human thought, such as stefano santabarbara, may think that riding on city buses for a hobby is sad. umbrella philsophers (quietly spoken and frequently ignored, but none the less real) hold that every bus holds the key to a new universe. sometimes human beings find these new universes on buses. usually, we don't. our more evolved cousins, however, understand that, through a lifetime of patient service and uncomplaining endeavour, combined with conscientious bus travel and a fair amount of luck, one can cross to the Other Side. on the other side... well, it isn't a simple process. firstly, there are the feelings of lack of self worth to deal with. those that have made the journey on their first incarnation are likely to feel this most acutely. those that have endured many lifetimes are usually aware of their own value, though of course they are not conceited about it. after these feelings are purged, the crossing to Paradise can be completed. so..what does Umbrella Heaven look like? i expect you're imagining beaches full of long, thin sun-loungers; parisian-style cafes packed with parapluieieie smiling and waving and looking so grand; self-actualised ex-shelters rejoicing in harmony; eight-pronged wonders skipping naked through fields of waving corn... well, its nothing like that. an umbrella once told me what heaven was like, but it isn't translatable into human-speak. you'd never understand it, unless you already possess the ability to converse with inanimate objects. i know some of you do. i have observed dimitra daisy deep in conversation with a cupboard door. i have watched as jim taylor chatted amiably to a pair of socks....those of you will already know all of the above, and any further explanation is unneccessary. those of you who DON'T know have much to learn. but there's a good place to start. the next time you shove your little friend up into the air (no, hewitt, i'm not talking about THAT little friend) just smile, nod your head and mutter a one-syllable word 'thanks'.... it won't go unnoticed. on the path to enlightenment, nothing does. like the buddha once said, 'there's many a muck makes a mickle'.. peace, my friends. xx ian +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: New T-shirts, "Max" for sale, Q&A's etc. ...
by Katrina House 14 Oct '02

14 Oct '02

Hello all, It's all go at Banchory HQ at the moment! Firstly, the brown "Graffiti" logo T-shirts that Chris designed are now in stock - a beige print on a chocolate brown t-shirt in Small, Medium, Large and Extra-Large sizes. Also on the Merchie front, the promised playing cards will be with us shortly - stay tuned for more details soon! You can view and purchase the new shirt online in the "T-shirts and Badges" section of http://www.belleandsebastian.co.uk/home Secondly, Stuart is auctioning his beloved car "Max" for charity! The reasoning and spiel behind his decision can be found in the "News" section of the above-mentioned site. The auction is taking place on e-Bay and you can bid online at http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=1777807925 And lastly, Stuart has been plugging on with the Q&A's so there is a second lot of responses online now, along with quite a few diary entries of what he's been up to recently. Keep sending your questions in and please be patient for those who haven't received a response yet! The Diary and Q&A's can be found in the "Writing" section at http://www.belleandsebastian.co.uk/home Cheers, B&S and Banchory. http://www.banchory.net http://www.belleandsebastian.co.uk/home +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: i lost my shed to a starship trooper
by ian 14 Oct '02

14 Oct '02

a patch of scorched earth. in films, a patch of scorched earth always means something. if i was fox mulder, and this was the x-files, i'd touch the ash, sniff it, and pronounce it evidence of some government conspiracy. fuck that. i've got all the evidence i need already. the local newspapers have reported mass-sightings of a unidentified flying object over selly oak some time on thursday night. as i headed down to london to see saint etienne (of which more in a later post, i'm sure..), something looking suspiciously like a garden shed lifted vertically into the sky above the fair city of birmingham. and then, it vanished. along, it seems, with sister janice slejj. sister janice turned up a while ago, and i kindly allowed her to reside in my airing cupboard, and then in my shed. now, she appears to have gone, leaving only a hole; a pile of batteries and what looks suspiciously like a bag full of jarlsberg rind behind her. accept it, ian, go with the cosmic flow. it has been that sort of week:- over the past couple of weeks, i've been enjoying what i thought was a lively and interesting correspondence with a texan 243 piece band called the polyphonic spree. today, i received this letter from their management: 'Dear Mr. Anscombe Consider this your final warning, before legal proceedings are instigated against you. Do not attempt to contact my clients again...blah blah blah...inappropriate...blah blah blah...threats..blah..genitals...yawn...witter...witter...do not, and never have, indulge in the type of behaviour to which you refer...blah blah....artists have a right to privacy and entering their homes in the middle of the night, dressed as a frenchman and asking them to feel your baton is a serious contravention of this...blah blah...not as if you can even play an instrument - the maracas really aren't that hard to master...blah blah... nipple clamps; erection; meringue; stimulation of the pancreas.....' on and ON it goes. goodness, some people have NO sense of humour. and, anyway, its not even as if its true..i wasn't dressed as a frenchman, i was dressed as marlene dietrich. some people see a beret and jump to all sorts of conclusions.. under neath ze lamp post by ze da da da.. darling i rem-em-ber the way la la la la.. some artists don't seem to understand that, underlying their worldwide success, has to be some modicum of RESPECT for their fans. its just like the time i stuck my hand down jarvis cocker's trousers in a crowded lift. when you become FAMOUS and a CELEBRITY, you must accept that people are entitled to DO that to you.. and THEN there was the time that... no, enough of past horrors..memories have a way of crashing into each other, don't they? you start off climbing into a seemingly innocuous one, thinking you know where its going, and before long you're involved in a 28-reverie pile-up, buried underneath a multi-layered mash of mental metal. and this is the worst time of year for memories. the darkness, even in the day time, drives us within ourselves. we go inside ourselves instinctively, knowing the darkest days are yet to come and the strength to face it full on has to be sought deep within. this year, though, i'm going to try and smile at the dark, rather than wish it away. it has its own beauty, so much more subtle and fascinating than that of the sun. perhaps that means staying away from memories, focussing on the now. some people would tell you the now is all you've got. but i don't feel like talking about them today. a cold philosophy, that, the idea that the past must die every second. if we don't have the past, we have nothing to build the present on. and everything needs foundations, no matter how insubstantial. if my garden shed had had better foundations, it might not be whizzing around the galaxy right now, with an excommunicated kleptomaniac nun in it. (then again, it probably would. at some point in their life, MOST people will find a member of the clergy stealing attempting to steal a wooden outhouse from them. i'm sure it has already happened to most of you. you've been around.) they know this already, ian, there's no need to tell them. smile at the dark, toss the rejection letter into the bin, plant bulbs in the scorched earth. allow something to grow from the mistakes of the past. i shall start my own cult. we shall wear WHITER ROBES and play BETTER MUSIC than the polyphonic spree. i shall practice looking at my memories, but not allowing them to overwhelm me. i shall look inside myself for strength, not for weakness, and admire the beauty that even bleakness has to offer. and i shall make sure i don't let any more nuns in my house. i hope this will make me happier. have loveliness, my dears xx ian ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tomorrow will bring happiness Or at least, another day Phil Ochs ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: The season has arrived
by robin stout 14 Oct '02

14 Oct '02

Saturday was too sunny to be true. I should have realised it was just the sun giving a final smile as its nose twitched and it prepared to sneeze. And on Sunday it did. It sneezed everywhere, all over my house and my bike, all over my hood and through the cracked soles of my brown leather shoes. My umbrella got caught by the howling crosswind every time I passed a side street. It blew inside out and I had to drag it back into shape. It flapped limply like a bat with a broken wing and held its course like a bicycle wheel with bent and twisted spokes. All the way home there was a trail of dead umbrellas, abandoned in doorways, thrown into hedges, sprawled in the middle of the road. I honestly thought I'd be swept away and end my days at the bottom of a drain somewhere, drowned and broken like one of those umbrellas. I didn't think the sky had the room for so much rain. Maybe this is just Wales. Don't know. Now all the coal's run out in the valleys perhaps they should work out a way of selling rain somehow. Rain energy? Will that work? We certainly have an inexhaustible supply here. Did anyone see John Otway singing "Bunsen Burner" on Top of the Pops? After Justin Fucking Timberlake and No Fucking Doubt I was beginning to lose the will to live, but then he came on and showed the spirit of Rock 'n' Roll is still alive and kicking. It's a shame it takes a 50 year old bloke with a boney chest to prove it. Well that got me feeling happier again and made me think of Belle and Sebastian's well deserved Brit Award - the last great rock moment - when a trailer came on for a new chat show on BBC2 Wales which is presented by Stuart Cable - you know, the one from the Stereophonics with the big scary perm. It looked dreadful; terrifying even. No wonder it's only on late night BBC2 Wales. That made me feel depressed again so I made myself a milky drink to get over the trauma. Blah blah blah, shut up robin. Anyway, I have a little proposal. Miss Annie Tremp and I will be having a mini Sinister picnic in Cardiff on Saturday, so if any sinisterenes are going to be in the area you're quite welcome to come along. I haven't worked out when or where it's going to be yet, but just send me an email if you're interested and I'll work something out. You may need to bring your wellies, though, or possibly a small boat if this rain keeps up. bye Robin x _________________________________________________________________ Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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