Mmm, lovely heroin. People look at me funny all the time because I'm a drug addict. Speaking of which, Miss Julia and i attended the local picture house last weekend to see "The Acid House". To tell the truth I found it quite hideous viewing, I didn't enjoy it much at all. "A soft touch" was the best, but still I wouldn't want to see it again. The first Scene with Slow Graffiti was excellent. I really liked the way the keyboard plays in the background before Struan and the gang kick the jams. Unfortunately the scene ends with a couple going for it up the bottom style. Christ, you could hardly show your parents that, could you? Shocking. I bet Isobel was not amused at all. I certainly wasn't. Down with this sort of thing. I saw a stoat once, and a tawny owl. The owl was sat in the middle of the road, and I slammed on the brakes. Emergency stop! We regarded each other, and for a moment I was gained the wisdom of the owl. Owls, you see are very wise creatures indeed. And for that moment, when I was as wise as the owl I thought about many things. I could think very clearly - answers to questions that had burdened me through my life came freely. Emotion and chemicals and war and religion, all of these things were simple to me, and I knew what had to be done to make the world a wonderful place again. But, when the moment passed I was exhausted. I passed out on the steering wheel. I awoke the next morning, and the car was covered in snow. And I had turned into a fox. I climbed out through the radiator and ran as fast as I could to the nearest church, which was Hyndland church in Glasgow's west end. The church had a closed sign on it, so I couldn't go in a pray to be returned to my natural state. I started crying, because I was starving and cold. Just then a friendly voice came from behind. "Are you wost, wittle one?". I looked up to see a young man with kind eyes and excellent bone structure. And a big earring. "Come with me wittle one, and I'll feed you warm you up". "Thank you kind sir" I said in my fox voice. The young man took me to the Grovener Cafe and bought me a vegetarian all day breakfast. He talked of the loves of his life and showed me a picture he had drawn of a pretty lady. When I ate my last bean I realised I was no longer a fox. I was Rod Begbie. +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister@majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo@majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" +---+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+