May 2001 - Sinister - missprint.org

Sinister: If I were bread, would you be my butter?
by Laura Llew 16 May '01

16 May '01

Caution: This post may cause drowsiness. Alcohol will intensify effect. Use care when operating 'heavy machinery'. "Students whose parents had the big bucks to afford it. Holly and Wanda had little bucks." This is an excerpt from Brittany Spears latest work of fiction (fiction referring to writing here - not to her chest size). After reading the stylistically beautiful melodramatic prose which Brittany weaves, with the help of her mommy, I find myself wondering how I could even begin to think of even writing a grocery list out with the knowledge that I shall always be literarily inferior. Somehow, I shall find the inner strength to move forward and write a post to Sinister. As much as I like Sexy Steve's posts, I must say - Enough with the Pynchon talk already!! It only makes me feel guiltier about that copy of GR sitting in the back window of my car. (I didn't want it to get lonely so I got the Gravity's Rainbow Reader's Companion to accompany it. Now they can be unread together. See, I'm nice to my books.) We could talk of Proust since I've made it halfway through Remembrance of Things Past. I once heard the pinefox proclaim that he wished he could cuddled up with a volume of Proust's work, sipping a cup of tea, and having a madeline or two..... right in front of a fire - so he would have something to throw the book into. Tsk, tsk. Not to like such a work! (I *adore* the first part of Swann's Way.) Mr. Fox, should I send you the new graphic novel of this classic which just came out? Calm down! When I say *graphic* I mean as in comics. Maybe you'd like it better if there were lots of purty pictures. You can't blame the pinefox if he's drawn to the visual. I heard that PF likes to fancy himself as the next Chi-Chi Rodriguez so he can go around simpering and saucily saying, "Why I got more legs than a bucket of chicken!" I fully approve. I think PF looks much better in short frilly skirts than he would in Trousers. ***STORYTIME*** Now, Miss Laura Llew is going to tell you about her dream from the other night! Doesn't it involve Belle and Sebastian, the Sinister list, or anyone you care about? Not a chance! Are you still excited? You should be! I had been on one of those "reality" TV shows like they have on MTV which is odd since nothing on that channel is real. (Please refer to previous allusion about Broccoli Spear's chest). The show I had been on had already finished and I was at a reunion special where all the cast members were sitting around in a circle talking about how life had changed since the show. One of the males was saying how disappointed he was to discover all the girls he had sex with during that season who he thought were beautiful were really Joyce Carol Oates ugly once he was sober enough to see straight. I replied with, "If you think that's bad, all the girls I slept with were so ugly that when I woke up the next morning they were males." Well, at least none of them looked like anyone on the front of the new single cover. Scary! (Notice the sly attempt to try and fake like this is content. Go Laura Go!) Today I discovered that the site of last year's Southern picnic, Big Witch Gap, wasn't named for a witch but after Tskilegwa who was the last of the Cherokee Eagle Killers. (They consider Eagles sacred and their feathers are used for various festivals and dances so only someone proscribed in the methods and procedures was allowed to kill the eagle.) After consulting with my multiple personalities, it was decided that this year's picnic would take place at the same spot and whenever I find my copy of B&S's last album with a recording of their performance at the Bowlie on the other side. Featured author has not yet been decided. I'm glad I don't live in London where I would have to pretend that I like picnics with lots of attendees. I'm glad I don't live near large phallic symbols in New York's Central Park which annually draws hordes of Sinisterines each year. I can sit here in Western Carolina, pouting, and pretending that I feel as if I were missing out just because I can't go to any B&S concerts in Scotland. It must be awfully hard to have to shout with glee at every opportunity, "I have tickets to see Belle and Sebastian!" Does your throat get sore? Do your fingers tire typing it? I know that b&s could never sound better than when I listen to them in my bed. If I ever decide to 'field test' this theory, I'll let y'all know. Laura 'meeting all dem der Laura Llew needs since 1977' A rough translation of "Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa" in Southern is: This ratcheer sho sounds like a sorry Leonard Skynrd cover so I reckon I'll be a gittin gone. _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: I went up to the country park...
by steve peet 16 May '01

16 May '01

... I did, on Saturday night, to hang about till after dark, but it was shut. So I went on Sunday instead and just hung around. Though I did see a fox with her cubs, which was neither eating biscuits nor saving rabbits, which was good. Star and Garter I often go to Smile whn I'm home in my native Manchester, though I only ever made it to the first B&S special... maybe one day Cay. Offbeat I am hopefully going to the B&S special at Offbeat to re-live my sheffield.ac.uk student days, am glad it's still going, so keep me posted! Good luck to all those studenty types doing exams too. Norway I was going to say Noweigan, but I cant spell it... Thanks for the phrases, I'll try them out on my Norway-person friend who will be sure to bemused, being not a fan. I still haven't been sent my AH ticket, but I guess they've got my cc number and I've got a booking code, so I'll just have to be patient and stop being paranoid. I wont relax till I've got it in my filthy mits though! Right, maybe see some of you Londony people at Strange Fruit? PeetSketchSteve _________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: And like vultures circling in the sky, I will wait till you are weak and about to die
by sweetie something 16 May '01

16 May '01

sinister *//why are you so close, closer than most, to my weakness?\\* well quite alot actually firstly and most scary this has nothing to do with me but my friend met this guy from the internet (they had been speaking for months) and they got on very well and one thing led to another led to spending the night together that was about 7 or 8 months ago this morning the police came round to her house asking her about the guy that she had seen all those months ago. asking her all sorts of questions about when they had been together and what they had done. an offer has been made for our house i dont like strangers coming into my home and looking about and when they came to my room i even turned the music down and smiled i didnt say anything though. i watched the little kids look at my rats, and secretely hoped theyd put their fingers too near the cage and get bitten. or at least id get to say that theyd better be careful or theyd get bitten. and they came back a second time and they came into my room again. i sat on my bed cross legged with my note pad, writing. and watched the kids get not too close to my rats again. and this time i didnt turn the music down so much and when the womans dad spoke to me, i didnt hear. so i just didnt say anything. and i had my boa, alcatraz, around my neck. they didnt come right into my room that time. my boyfriend has been and gone oh i got a hello but now he is away again for 3 months this time without even a goodbye. and i dont have his number now not that i think ill ever need it again (even though, officially, we havent split up) i am releived in some ways but mostly sad thinking that thats been almost 10months and to know for a fact if i had decided to take that i dont care option sooner i could have been going out with a much nicer boy but like always. i thought 'no'. and now its too late. but even more sad because,the 10 or so minutes spent alone with him although i only sat at the computer, and he sat on the floor a bit away i think. by the way that i wanted to sit next to him, and wanted to hold his hand and wanted for him to hold me that i still have some feelings for him buts thats maybe just because 10months is a long time and for 8 months i remained monogomous but im not sure how i feel at all i think i might still like him but im not sure. i dont even having the tiniest wee smidgen of a feeling of guilt from cheating at all. and i have as good as announced to the world that i am single but, if he came back right now. oh i dont know. i really dont. those days: 14th, 15th, 16th, and 17th assuming u know what that means of course listening, still sweetie xox ICQ #42242252 MSN instant msngr: something_sinister(a)hotmail.com AOLim id: IIIsecondcreep *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* everything i do, everything i say, everything i try to be everything is wrong, everything is right, everything is up to me everything i am, everything i was, everything i aim to be everything is black, everything is white, everything is in between +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Leicester Picnic
by DansonHatcher＠aol.com 16 May '01

16 May '01

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii you guys First things first: LEICESTER PICNIC ! After going to the York picnic I was all up for another and so I sent a few experimental mails out Well, this has got a fair bit more interest than I was expecting. mmmmmmmmmm, lots of interest but you just make sure you all come. For anyone who has escaped what has now become a mass publicity campaign the gathering will be held in Victoria park, Leicester, more than likely on the 30th (ish) of June , more definate details to come in the next few days... Also i`m no longer unemployed which is good ..and bad. Good because I get paid (weekly!) and bad because I`m going on to the late (4pm-midnight) shift. anyway! Tomorrow is Emma's birthday so I have to rush into Waterstones in town and get her a book, not sure which one , so many to chose from! also Madeleine who sent me an Email, Hi I think I`ve sent my reply to the wrong place(derr) but yes I am interested in the minibus. Mail me back with any info. hey now, hey now, hey now don`t dream its over. James. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: The Penguin Book of Birds' Arses (Large Print Edition)
by Peter Miller 16 May '01

16 May '01

Foxes don't eat biscuits. They eat chickens. They rip their bastard heads off and spit feathers all over the tablecloth. Before the advent of Larry the Frog, Elenita99's best friend was a mobile phone with an endless stream of French loonies on the other end. Preston? I've heard the locals are a bit rough. I hope you're all being polite to these nice old ladies who man the ticket booths at provincial theatres. Don't forget, you are ambassadors for rock'n'roll. On the website, poor old Neil says stop writing to him asking when B&S are going to play in your town. I can sympathise - "When are you playing in Sidmouth? When are you playing in Sidmouth?" I'd like to go to the Royal Albert Hall. I'd like to go to Preston too. Beautiful Bournemouth. And all the other places. I'd like to do the whole tour. Has the tour got a name? The Guns'n'Roses tour is called "Chinese Democracy Starts Now" which suggests to me that they haven't really got over all their drug problems. Choo-Choo Charlie sounds like a particularly powerful strain of cocaine. Which reminds me, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIG DAVE! I think it would be good if everyone met up before the Glasgow gigs in a pub, especially people who've come a long way. I understand there are some nice ones near the Barrowlands. Apparently there's a good one just opposite, really handy, called THE SARACEN'S HEAD. Why doesn't everyone meet up there? Sister Disco +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: yes, me, i'm going to scarborough fair...
by tomatron 16 May '01

16 May '01

never been to scarborough before. i'm all excited. although it does bear slightly too close a resemblance to the word 'scabrous' for comfort. Hannah Brown wrote: > something about a we should write a b&s football song, can't remember the precise details may i suggest the title 'fold your hands child, you walk like dave beasant'? may i? no? sorry. (especially to the vast swathes of listees who haven't got a clue who the man dave beasant is) i just realised that i now have 1 1/2 weeks to learn my entire final year course. i'm guessing this won't be easy, or they'd just teach it in 1 1/2 weeks, rather than 'a year'. if anybody has a deep knowledge of metaphysics, epistemology, sociology of science and the history of medicine, you're more than welcome to get in touch with me to tell me the answers (or indeed to impersonate me for the duration of my exams). do they have 'answers' these days? i'm not sure they do. i think that might just have been maths and chemistry, anyway. i fondly remember geography, when all you did was colour in maps. oh, and please forgive mr charlie his obsession with agrarian collectives. we watched ken loach's 'land & freedom' last night, it has that sorta effect. give him a few days, he'll be back to advocating what could best be described as artistic kibbutzes founded on a system of communitarian intellectual activity, as is normally his wont. either way, the revolution is important, kids. yours off to join the international brigade, tommi (sheffield wednesday's owl) +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Red
by Sally_Moore＠mandg.co.uk 16 May '01

16 May '01

Ok I am really embarrassed now, I've actually gone red. Katrina told us who the people in the picture are days ago, at the request of my own Dad. Worst thing is I read it all as well. Sorry everyone. I won't be posting again for a while. Sally xx ______________________________________________________________________ The information contained in this message may be CONFIDENTIAL and is intended for the addressee only. Any unauthorised use, dissemination of the information, or copying of this message is prohibited. If you are not the addressee, please notify the sender immediately by return e-mail and delete this message. Although this e-mail and any attachments are believed to be free of any virus, or other defect which might affect any computer or system into which they are received and opened, it is the responsibility of the recipient to ensure that they are virus free and no responsibility is accepted by the sender for any loss or damage from receipt or use thereof. Please note that all e-mail messages are subject to interception for lawful business purposes. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: second row in the infants
by Choo-Choo Charlie 16 May '01

16 May '01

So, i've got tickets for Scarborough!!!!! You just ring the box office and a nice lady (formerly the grumpy stressed one, now happy to help) takes down yr details and yr off. We're in the second row - i dreamt all nite last about the gug and bizarrely, it was chris that i spoke to most, with stuart being a bit aloof. Isobel wore a flowery dress and seemed happy. The theatre was full with people waving scarves on the balcony. I do hope that lots of people are coming to Scarb cos the internet says that its capacity is very big and everyone seems to be going to the Albert Hall. Come to Scarborough. It's lovely. The fish and chips will be amazing. It's so amazing tho. I think i'll probably dream of it every nite from now til june 26th. I've been having quite horrific dreams recently actually. Loads of witches. Loads of them. I think it's cos i'm sleepy all the time and worrying about not doing any work ever for my exams. Tho i did conclude that American cultural imperialism doesn't exist apart from building Warner Villages in every town. See, it's capitalism that destroys us in the end, not America, cos capitalism impoverishes us in every way and puts a big theme park where there could be an adventure playground or an agrarian collective. I mean it actually - it's a revolution in the imagination. There might as well be an agrarian collective there for all the good that another Starbux does in its stead. So, that's 41 days to go then..... love charlie s t a y b e a u t i f u l +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: 17. mai- gratulaerer til alle i Norge!
by idleberry 16 May '01

16 May '01

I think thats how its spelt.... heck of a word to spit out for me actually. Tomorrow is Norwegian Day, 17th May, to celebrate Norwegian indepedance. And I've got a Norwegian exam. But afterward, I shall be getting extremely drunk and cheering, and singing "Ja, vi elsker dette land.. " rather loudly and incoherently with all my other Norwegian pals. And booing anyone who brings a Swedish flag. So, in the spirit of me panicking, and tomorrow being Norwegian day, heres a quick guide for non-Norwegians as to how to do Norwegian. Jeg heter... My name is.... Jeg kommer fra USA/ Skottland/Tyskland/ England I come from USA/Scotland/Germany/England Hva heter du? whats your name? Kan jeg faa din telefonnummer? Can I have your telephone number? Kan jeg faa et ol? can I have a beer? Jeg er glad i deg I fancy you Du har vakre oyene/kroppen/haret You have beautiful eyes/body/hair Skal vi danser? shall we dance? Jeg liker Belle and Sebastian I like Belle And Sebastian Jeg misliker Steps I don't like Steps Steps er dritt Steps are sh*te Jeg er full I'm drunk Hvor er vi? Where are we? Du bor her? You live here? Er dette din seng? Is this your bed? Hvor skal jeg sover? Where shall I sleep? Nei, jeg har ingen penger No, I have no money Ja, vaer sa snill Yes please Det var fantastisk! That was fantastic! Tusen takk! Many thanks! Vi snakkes! Speak to you soon! So there you go. Hope that helps if you ever suddenly find yourself stranded in a kiosk in ooh... Trondheim. Hmm. Trying to forget I have an exam tomorrow. Okay, I'm off to try and forget elsewhere. Hugs & stuff for everyone, and "hurrah!"s to the Norwegians bye. Idles ===== http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/corduroysmoke we're all smoking our corduroys in our secret little b+s club- what are you doing?? __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Yahoo! Auctions - buy the things you want at great prices http://auctions.yahoo.com/ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: brains the size of a pea
by Robert Brennan 16 May '01

16 May '01

I decided to hold off posting for a bit until I had a bit more to say than "I've got an Albert Hall ticket! YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!" but nothing happened so I'm telling you anyway. I've got the Friday off and a pre-gig picnic sounds like a good idea but has anyone noticed that the venue is just a fossilised bone's throw away from the absolute ace-est place in London? Of course I'm talking about the Natural History Museum where you can find the reconstructed skeletons of dinosaurs like Tyrannosaurus Rex and The Pink Floyd (which attacked its prey by emitting unbearable guitar solos). And its got great big tropical insects (dead ones) and a place where you can find out how your brain works. So does anyone fancy taking their packed lunches on a Sinister school trip? Bring a pencil and don't forget your permisson slips. 80s brat-pack films: Has no-one mentioned the greatest of them all which was of course Ferris Bueller's Day Off? Anyone... Anyone... That Jonathan David cover photo looks like the awkward early bit in a toga party before everyone gets proper drunk and starts trying to yank each other's sheets off. Back to work Robster ____________________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Get your free @yahoo.co.uk address at http://mail.yahoo.co.uk or your free @yahoo.ie address at http://mail.yahoo.ie +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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