July 2001 - Sinister - missprint.org

Sinister: I got a new partner riding with me.
by David Clark. 27 Jul '01

27 Jul '01

I'm just writing to let Jonny know he can relax a little on the Elvis thing as "Always on my mind" is more properly a Willie Nelson song (Any who are familiar with Palace will now understand the title line.)And it's pretty safe to assume that were there an Elvis, he would certainly not be down the Willows this Friday. I read of a woman once who had caught one of the real Elvis' silk scarves once and had then set out to catch as many as she could from the impersonators of the world (why both Elvis and his league of Elvii insist on chucking neck gear I do not know) at the time of writing she had over 200 carefully folded in a drawer in her room. To all those who have quibbled on all matters toast and jam (shit, had anyone mentioned jam), you may be pleased to know that I have found the Good Doctor. <http://www.drtoast.com/> I'm sure he can set us right, and he seems to have a Haiku or two. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: RE: the boy done wrong again
by philip boucher 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

hello, well this equation thing reminded me of something... at work the other day, mike showed me a little thing he made, my maths is a little rusty, but it has to prove _something_ about women... women = time X money time = money so.... women = Money (squared) ___________ money = \ / \/ of all evil (root of all evil...) so... ___________ women = \ / (squared) \/ of all evil the square root cancels out the squared thingy (which i cant figure out on the keyboard) so.... women = the root of all evil. a bit long winded and comepletely off topic, but it impressed me... errrr, content? someone saw my B+S shirt the other day and asked if I had seen the high fidelity... (is that pushing it?) I just wanted to share that little equation type thing. Ahem. love philip http://philip_boucher.tripod.com/philipboucher/ _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Elvis has now left the building
by Oonagh & Jonny 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

hmmm, i may have disappeared into some kind of black hole, as i posted this yesterday, but it appears not to have made its merry way to sinister - if by some miracle of modern science it ends up posted twice - apologies list mummy! please don't tell me off. my reason for posting is that i am getting quite disturbed and feel i must turn to sinister for some much needed psychotherapy - i fear i must be a fucked in the head psycho... i am lay back on the couch, so please help me doctor. the problem is that i appear to be haunted by mr elvis aaron presley (elvis aaron? what kind of a name is elvis aaron? you can't imagine elvis aaron signing on or attending his new deal appointments. then again, maybe you can...) it all started last week when i was listening to a century of elvis - yeah, i know, i know - the thing was i had a burning desire to listen to lazy line painter jane as is oft my want, and quite simply couldn't be bothered to get off my lardy arse before all four tracks had wafted through the air - i know that he said that sinister is a bit freaky but i do have a sneaking regard for mr david (oops - am i allowed to say that? no archives you see to check if i'm a true siniterine or whether i should be persona non grata) anyhow, the next day i happened to be travelling through sunny salford (older readers may recall a certain lads club of note) to be bombarded at every turn by posters announcing ELVIS! LIVE! AT THE WILLOWS! (for those less familiar with quaint northern english traditions like whippet racing ang pigeon fancying, the willows is the home of those giants of sporting incompetence, salford city reds rugby league club, rugby league being a *ahem* contact sport for those with a testosterone (sp??) overload, with a ball somewhat incidental to the proceedings). anyhow, the willows is also home to many a fine stars in their eyes fifth placed contender come friday or saturday night. the fact that i must remain at home to tend my children becomes all the more glorious with the thought that i could be living it up at the willows listening to *celine dion* or *ronan keating*. the thing with the posters was that it didn't say (in letters too small to read) steven patrick appearing as ELVIS! LIVE!, but just ELVIS! LIVE! - maybe there is something behind a century of elvis... anyhow, i am haunted since then - i turn on the tv - mr presley is there. i open my sinister posts and ms laura llew not only mentions elvis but refers to always on my mind... i began to seriously doubt my sanity when i went to see the luscious ballboy play in manchester last night - i was fully prepared for the chorus of public park aka dogs not kids with its i'll be elvis presley to your marilyn monroe, but for the support (i know not who they were suffice to say that in their mind's eye they were performing at their sixth sell-out night at milton keynes not to fifty or so people in the night and day cafe) to dedicate a song to elvis... i am deranged and only sinister can save me now... jonny ps - did i tell you that since my baby left me, i found a new place to dwell... no on second thoughts, don't go there... pps - ms titchener was quite right to have ticked us all off (or at least those of us who can receive 97-99fm on wunnerful radio one) - the white stripes are rockin' - they've not so long ago done a cover of jolene, so i await jailhouse rock with glee well that last bit should be in past tense now - they did rock, but alas they did not jailhouse rock - perhaps elvis has now left the building... must go - chris morris beckons... +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: i put my head over
by Jo tomas 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

the trench and say a whispered hello. It's daunting and a bit scary. i am jo on my stereo is camera obscura belle and of course the specials and tom paulin. in my fridge olives and vodka it's nice to meet you all. Joxx ===== small town night club over a pub/girls in make up thicken the blood ____________________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Get your free @yahoo.co.uk address at http://mail.yahoo.co.uk or your free @yahoo.ie address at http://mail.yahoo.ie +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Wales - the Undiscovered Country
by Robin Stout 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

I went to Wales today, for a job interview in Newport. I'd forgotten Wales existed. The Alpha Line darted past ruminating sheep, sheltering in shadows, and terraced houses whose gardens were impossibly full of rusty cars. They must have driven them through the kitchen. The interview went well, and now I'm worried I might have got the job. You see, when I went for it I assumed I wouldn't, and now I don't know. Suddenly things have become daunting. I'll have to stop sitting around all day and become a working man. I'll have to polish my shoes every day and grow a moustache and buy a walking-stick umbrella. Oh Lord! It's very scary. Then I arrived home and my sister's goldfish had died. It hadn't been eating properly and had been looking peaky for days. I'd say it had been looking "green around the gills" but it hadn't. So it had been swimming around that morning, unhappy but alive, then when I arrived home it was swimming on its side, without moving its fins, or breathing - or living for that matter. I put it in a cornflakes box and gave it a dignified burial in the bin. My sister's in New Zealand, so she doesn't *have* to know. I can always pretend it's still alive - "How's the goldfish?" "Oh, you know, swimming." "Oh that's good." It's not like it ever did much else. But I don't think I could handle the guilt. So Belle and Sebastian *have* to release their new single soon to take my troubles away. The only thing that would make me happier would be a photo of Ken Chu's bare bottom. But even the Pope couldn't afford one of those. I'm not coming to the picnic on Saturday because I'm working. But I might climb onto the roof of the shop with a cheese sandwich and pretend I'm there. At least that way I can pretend I'm good at football. love Robin x _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: they'll hop & giggle & wiggle, until it gets too dark
by john john 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

Dear Sinister i was at the dentist today! just for a normal check-up, but it was doublescary, because my sister is on holiday.. shes usually the dental nurse for my dentist, and holds my hand when im ready to faint from the needles, and i thought i was going to get a big scary nurse that would squeeze my hand supersore.. it turned out that the nurse was really fab, my hand was untouched, and i was out of the door as quickly as id came in i popped into a shop on the way home & bought some fizzy strawberry laces, which i ate along the road, as i was looking about & watching things & people. it was a wee bit rainy, so there wasnt many people about, but there were some ducks in the river and on the pond in the park, who looked a bit wet, but i suppose ducks do from time to time i was nearly home, and there was a bunch of wee rough kids who were looking at me.. they were about 100 yards away, but i could hear them say john to each other.. i was ready to walk around them, and the quiet & demure one with a sweet smile let me past.. one of the loud & rough ones said sorry, i thought you were john.. i didnt say a thing, and when i walked past, the same girl appeared to have realised my fleece was a girls top, and shouted at me. i had never seen these kids before i got home & watched some telly & ate some more laces (my tongues all fizzed away now)... LA 7s fab, apart from on the outtakes, when they had one of those directors cut board thingies, and it said J.Maxwell on it.. baaaa i called my sister at her cottage to tell her of the trauma, and we spent ages talking about spiders and camping, and shes going to orkney soon.. i went a few years ago, and its absolutely gorgeous.. but its really bad for hay fever b&s day soon! and i hope everybody & a few more are going to be in north berwick on Saturday.. im not actually going myself i think ill go isolate myself up in the hills with my mp3 player and sob the day away and have lovely cheese & ham sandwiches.. anyways, im away to watch hollyoaks.. byeee, johnjohn. xxxx _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: the boy done wrong again
by Apps Ben (Mr B) 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

Lovely people, My humblest apologies. I said...... Chris Perriman asked: "so how would B&S be described best as a mathematical equation?" What about: _________ B&S = ___ / \/ all tweevil hee hee! But it all went horribly wrong. I was trying to pictorially demonstrate B&S = the root of all tweevil, it was hilarious at the time, honestly we (well I) were wetting ourselves. But then it went all pear shaped and I've egg on my face and any other number of food related embarrassments. So sorry, really really sorry. :-/ Crumbs, now I've kinda wasted everyone's time *again*, but I couldn't just leave it. Best think of some content or something quick to dig me outa this hole......right, MyMomSays you're very cruel cos I thought I had a crush but I don't, hey you did apologise straight aways so you're forgiven if I am. Aint Ken magic for doin' that temporary archive. Someone give the man a job. Why cockscrew.com though? I'm banishing myself now for a year or two til i have something worthwhile to say and before I break something else. ttfn ben x +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Someone has a Crush on you ;)
by MyMomSays＠aol.com 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

First and foremost, I would like to apologize because I put every single listee on my Crush List on CrushLink. That means, yes, you TOO will get this fantabulous e-mail taunting you with the prospect of true love. You see, they also have this awful method of giving you more and more hints if you add more and more crushes to your CrushList; I, being extremely anxious to figure out who this elusive "crush" is, added names to kingdom come just trying to get a hint that didn't keep me up at night. Needless to say, I don't think anyone really has a crush on me, it's just bollocks. For some reason there are a certain set of conditions under which I do not sleep well. They are: 1. Brand new sheets. 2. Going to bed sans knickers 3. Having been in #sinister for 6 hours that day I had all three, sadly enough, kept tossing and turning worried someone was watching me sleep and might get a peek at my ass, and dreaming about watching the IRC channel scroll by. Here, let me BREAK IT DOWN: Yesterday, July 25, 2001: Number of hours spent in #sinister: 5.5 Number of times Boss caught me in #sinister: 1 Number of times I shifted around while wearing parachute pants just to hear "that noise" : 2 Number of VH1 "Behind the Music" specials viewed: None Number of times I missed Nickelodeons' 80's daytime programming: Too many to count Number of times I lusted after Ken Chu: Again, too many to count. Ounces of Diet Coke consumed: 60 Number of minutes consumed by considering buying "like, a radass stereosystem": 150 That's about all I did yesterday. Gurgles, Your Beloved Mandee +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: chimpanzees, instruments of torture and things that go 'whoooooo'
by Desmond Torpey 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

howdy... ...i've just about recovered from the recent flurry of B+S activity...i can get back to the usual incoherent,rambling, entirely content-free posts of old...although the peel session songs have got me unreasonably excited about the forthcoming EP (and future albums)...if this is the standard of stuff that they wont even bother properly releasing then sweet jesus i cant wait...'magic of a kind word' is just the most fantastically danceable peice of greatness since..well...jonathan david...especially the sixties style 'woooooo' shout halfway through...and as for the belle and sebastian do twee hip-hop stylee of 'shoot the sexual athlete'..mmmmmmarvellous.. ...i'll have to think of something else to do on national belle and sebastian day...getting to london is too expensive for my already ridiculously stretched budget...perhaps i'll just run around some feilds with 'tigermilk' on my walkman, eating cake...being unemployed is more depressing than i imagined..i'm not even technically a student anymore so i cant use that as an excuse for being poor,lazy and unwilling to work...i am in fact, merely a bum...a very bored bum at that... a trip to the dentists the other day was almost a highlight...especially the bizzare cable channel they have running in the waiting room...from what i could gather, 'the smile channel' had an output consisting of looped videos of chimpanzees throwing protective goggles around, refusing to sit up straight in the dentists chair and visiting second hand clothes shops in soho...perhaps patients are so busy trying to work out what the hell is going on they will forget the instruments of torture and unbearable pain that awaits them...i think maybe i have hit a brick wall when this constitutes entertainment..i have been living in waiting rooms for the last four weeks..an endless round of job centres,employment agencies,surgeries and banks..all i've managed to achieve is the knowledge that i know less than i imagined about computers (ie nothing) and no bugger will give me a job...things, as usual, havent worked out quite the way i planned them to..actually thats a lie..i havent planned anything really...thats the problem...i never know where i'm going or what i'm going to do with...life..and stuff...i should be feeling wonderful i suppose..freedom for at least a year..to whatever i want..with no responsibility, commitment etc..hmmmm...bit i just can work out what to do with it... ...reading 'the bell jar' and listening to 'pink moon' probably hasnt helped...in saying that however, i only brought 'pink moon' last week and going on reputation i expected it to be half an hour of pure naked, unbearable misery...i actually found most of it to be kind of uplifting, especially 'from the morning'...nick drake depressed? tcha!...where was this post going?...i've completely forgotten... ta ta... __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Make international calls for as low as $.04/minute with Yahoo! Messenger http://phonecard.yahoo.com/ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: open the door, get on the floor
by Apps Ben (Mr B) 26 Jul '01

26 Jul '01

Sam got the new SFA album. So did I. Only I haven't got a posh stereo. 'It's not the end of the World' is my favourite, sounds like the Carpenters. Which is a good thing. Looks like B&S day's gona be a scorcher (in the good old UofK). Might have to ditch my cords for shorts. Bring tambourines, recorders, maraca's and guitars to Primrose Hill. Flowers in your hair. Sweet music in the air. It'll be like the summer of 69 all over again. I'm guessing. Chris Perriman asked: "so how would B&S be described best as a mathematical equation?" What about: _________ B&S = ___ / \/ all tweevil hee hee! Ribena and scones in Jurassic Park anyone? Now that *would* be a sinister picnic. Soundtrack by T Rex, live on Triceratops of the Pops. sorry, *old* joke. I'm in work and just took a phone call from a lady who sounded like she was standing in a schoolyard. It took me away for a moment. There were kids voices shouting and playing, I was waiting for the strings and dum-d-dum der dum-d-dum of IYFS to glide in when she said "HE-LLO-OO?" This goddam band'll get me sacked. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Hi Ho. Lunch is over. back2reality. Ben XXX PS Hooray for the strawberries and cream girl for saying "And as for cars they're evil." +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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